Heaven

[Hyperion]

HeveaN is where they let the right people in and keep the wrong people out.

Profound. Embellishment

 

[RexCathedra]

My mother the teacher says this is an easy one -- you get there -- it's a room full of teachers, and the guy at the front with the LCD projector says "All right, let's NOT break up into small groups..."

 

[seagullsovergrimsby]

And we beat Palace every game

 

[looney]

Profound. Embellishment

Its like you walk into Heveans pub and in front of you theres some 20 something knob in skinny jeans, moused hair and beard looking like a closet homosexual, windswept jihadi.

He asks the barman for a bottle of San quackquack Larrrgarrrr. The barmen says, "Certainly". Pulls the pump and a trap door opens and said tool disappears without even a murmer. In Hevean stupid people would be escorted outside "to be slapped". You Order your beer, say hello to Hitoney who is sitting at the bar nursing his red glowing cheek, and you pick up a copy of the Daily Heaven to read the article by Parrish why he thought it would be good to loan the Palace first team out to Rochdale before the 3rd round of the FA Cup.

 

[Spider]

I have seen Deerhunter, Liars, Okkervil River, Jens Lekman, Beach House and many more in Heaven. It's a very good place, made particularly amusing by the fact that they run it as of it was a club night for chinstroker gigs - so muscly camp blokes in vests behind bar and security patrolling toilets every two minutes to make sure you're not up to any funny business!

 

[Icy Gull]

It's where you spend eternity sitting on a cloud playing a harp, great

 

[The Sock of Poskett]

Life's best bits multiplied. No more cryin', dyin' or pain. I can feel a song coming on ...

 

[Tricky Dicky]

It does.here on Earth,trouble is people go through Hell to get there-take stock,marvel at the abundances this beautiful planet has to offer..

I would agree there are fantastic things on this Earth to marvel at, but that's not really heaven is it, it's just Earth.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

I imagine the Heaven Utd football team have made all their new signings for next season early and are all fully fit and ready to go. 1st game is against Hell City, I wonder who will win?

Wages of sin would be a problem

 

[Goldstone1976]

Wages of sin would be a problem

Indeed. King Baal might be a handful at floated deliveries to the back post too.

 

[Wellesley]

HeveaN is where they let the right people in and keep the wrong people out.

1901 Club. No peasants.

 

[The Antikythera Mechanism]

[YT]oc_x2-rCFWI[/YT]

Forgot how good this was

 

[rocker959]

Valhalla

 

[Weststander]

So going to a Gay night club automatically means you are bent ?

Not at all.
Were well worth going to as they played the best dance music.
And because of their 'reputation', knuckle-draggers never went to them ..... what a bonus.

 

[Weststander]

[YT]oc_x2-rCFWI[/YT]

Forgot how good this was

Brilliant track.

 

[withdeanwombat]

IF it exists, then it's like the Republic of Somersetshire, but without the speed cameras.

 

[Baldseagull]

What do you reckon It's like?

I will never know. Far too big a sinner and utterly unrepentant.

 

[murciagull]

I will post when I get there

 

[Dan Aitch]

 

[Wrong-Direction]

Oi there's already a thread about religion!