Glass hammers, tartan paint etc

[Puppet Master]

Anyone got any good examples of "Fools Errands" like these? Been trying to catch out my dad for years ever since he sent me to the shop as a lad and got me to ask for some elbow grease...

 

[happypig]

Many, many years ago I went into a telephone exchange and there was an apprentice holding onto the end of a piece of wire; around the corner was another apprentice holding the other end. I don't know how long they had been there but they were still there when I left 30 minutes later.

 

[dougdeep]

A Long Weight was a favourite where I worked.

 

[Gazwag]

have you tried sending him for a long weight


Ah too late

 

[Flex Your Head]

Can you get me some hooks for hanging wallpaper please?

 

[Puppet Master]

Skyhooks is a good one

 

[Hillian1]

I was sent off for dehydrated water, a long weight, left handed screwdrivers etc.

I always knew they were "fools errands" so just went outside and had a few fags.

Oh how they laughed.

 

[DanielT]

Skirting board ladder

 

[Albion_Dave]

Many years ago when i was labouring on a building site i spent a good hour being sent from pillar to post for a skirting ladder .

 

[Goldstone1976]

An AC battery? A copper magnet?

 

[Puppet Master]

Here's a good modern day one - virtual memory.

 

[marcos3263]

When I were a lad my Granddad got me to ask for Left Handed Chopsticks much to the amusement of the extended family, waiters and nearby tables. To this day the laughs haunt me. To a small degree I think this ruined my life.......

 

[Puppet Master]

Did anyone see that episode of The Island with Bear Grylls where they convinced the Essex lad a haggis was a four-legged, purple animal found running around the hills in Scotland

 

[Gritt23]

Skyhooks is a good one

That's one which has actually become true. Send someone out for skyhooks these days, and they'll come back with some.

 

[keaton]

At a factory i was asked to get a 'HammerFore"

que "What's a hammerfore?"
"banging in nails"

 

[daveinprague]

Everybody in / or ex RN knows about Skyhooks... remember 'Maidens water' as well

 

[Cian]

Not unknown to send a junior sound engineer in to find the knob/fader to "give it a bit more oomph" on a mixing desk.

 

[spongy]

Imperial and metric Spirit level bubbles is one I've heard,

Also holes, and if anyone ever needs some I have plenty at work, literally.

 

[Norman Baker suck my lozenge]

I remember on my first ship ,HMS Newcastle the lads a told me to ask the buffer for a spur lash,He threw me into Gibraltar harbour shouting "SPUURLAAASH"!

 

[Czechmate]

Ask him to get you a metric adjustable spanner .