Food Hell - Awful Meals

[Uncle Spielberg]

What do you consider to be food hell. I had a can of corn beef hash from the local supermarket with uncle bens microwave rice. I heated it up in the microwave for 4 minutes as instructed. The meal was an abomination and quite the worst concoction I can recall for many a year. To give an idea of how bad it was my Dog, upon me emptying my plate into his bowl, sniffed at it for a few seconds and then walked away without touching it.

Under no circumstances prepare a meal of:

Corn Beef Hash in a tin
Uncle Bens microwave rice

Can you beat this monstrosity

" you have not been charged for this information "

 

[tip top]

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

this is not a tipping thread

 

[Shegull]

Uncle Ben's Microwavable rice is lovely but the corn hash or whatever it was certainly doesn't do anything for the taste buds.

 

[Lokki 7]

I don't mind a bit of corned beef hash. As a student I used to fry it up crispy with some onion, chilli and galic. Bit of HP sauce, lovely.

 

[tip top]

this is not a tipping thread

errr........ i know

 

[algie]

Instant smash is rough

 

[Easy 10]

At school once, during breaktime in the playground, I offered Joanne Patching one of my Hula Hoops. She gratefully accepted, but unbeknown to me, as she reached inside the bag to claim her share of the crispy snack, she opened her hand and deposited several small plastercine pellets amongst the remaining Hoops. I continued to consume the remainder of the bag, but I soon became aware of an unpleasantly soft and mushy sensation taking place within the cavity of my mouth. On checking inside the bag, I saw the plastercine residue skulking at the bottom, and turned to see Joanne Patching collapsing with laughter next to the woodwork prefab.

I threw the bag and the remaining Hula Hoops in the bin. I got the last laugh though, because in PE a few weeks later, I fell on top of her during a frenzied mixed basketball session, and touched her boob as I clambered to my feet. I always called her \"Titpatch\" after that.

 

[Common as Mook]

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/norfolk/6936644.stm

This sounds like proper food hell.

 

[algie]

At school once, during breaktime in the playground, I offered Joanne Patching one of my Hula Hoops. She gratefully accepted, but unbeknown to me, as she reached inside the bag to claim her share of the crispy snack, she opened her hand and deposited several small plastercine pellets amongst the remaining Hoops. I continued to consume the remainder of the bag, but I soon became aware of an unpleasantly soft and mushy sensation taking place within the cavity of my mouth. On checking inside the bag, I saw the plastercine residue skulking at the bottom, and turned to see Joanne Patching collapsing with laughter next to the woodwork prefab.

I threw the bag and the remaining Hula Hoops in the bin. I got the last laugh though, because in PE a few weeks later, I fell on top of her during a frenzied mixed basketball session, and touched her boob as I clambered to my feet. I always called her \"Titpatch\" after that.

Reminds me of when i was in primary school and one lad use to go down the bins looking for remains of apples.He did this nearly everyday

 

[Tooting Gull]

The real corned beef hash crime is to get in from a tin in the first place. Cook it yourself - the Lokki formula looks good, might try that myself next time.

My food hell is steak tartare, bloody disgusting and I only ever ordered it once out of total ignorance.

 

[The Wookiee]

Rice Pudding

 

[keaton]

I will pretty much eat anything, but i had Jellied Eels for the first time recently and they were bluddy disgusting, like sicked-up cat food with jelly round the outside

 

[Falmer Flutter ©]

I will pretty much eat anything, but i had Jellied Eels for the first time recently and they were bluddy disgusting, like sicked-up cat food with jelly round the outside

Was once at this girl's 30th birthday and for some reason among the buffet was a big bowl of jellied eels. Well, I'd had a couple of drinks so thought I'd give it a bash. Big mistake. Truly revolting. How I never threw up among the cheese and pineapple sticks, I'll never know. Dirty Cockney slag.

 

[Cian]

Reminds me of when i was in primary school and one lad use to go down the bins looking for remains of apples.He did this nearly everyday

I went to school with someone who picked up loose crisps, apple cores, etc. He was well fed by his parents, he was just a greedy bollox. And is now about 25 stone.

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

Easy did you go to Mile Oak Primary as I recall a Joanne Patching.

 

[The Wookiee]

Semolina

 

[Herne Hill Seagull]

Absolutely anything with mushrooms in it. When I lived alone and the g/f was a visitor rather than a joint owner of our house, I wouldn't even let them into my flat uncooked - can't stand them.

I have to leave the kitchen if they're being cooked 'coz the smell makes me gag too. Disgusting things.

Anything tasting of aniseed too - how anybody would choose to ingest that flavour is completely beyond me...

 

[Jesus Gul]

Enjoy every type of food except this fish scale porridge stuff i had at Hong Kong airport. Pretty popular over there but didn't do me any favours.

I'm currently reading Tom Parker-Bowles' book The Year of Eating Dangerously. Only got through the first chapter on elvers in the West Country so far. Wonder if corn beef hash, smash or fish scale porridge is mentioned later on

 

[Monkster]

Absolutely anything with mushrooms in it. When I lived alone and the g/f was a visitor rather than a joint owner of our house, I wouldn't even let them into my flat uncooked - can't stand them.

Me to but for a different reason, worked in a Mushroom factory before Uni several years ago......