[Misc] dealing with depression

[father_and_son]

Had a few instances over the past few decades, most recently down to a bullying boss who I escaped from by jumping to a failing business via another non-starter (so a few years of hell).
Starting to come out the other side with the help of counselling... if you are local the Rock Clinic have two banches in Brighton (one near Hove border and one Kemptown side). Both provide private counselling services but at reasonable rates and you will be seen, assessed and assigned an appropriate counsellor far quicker than the NHS can arrange.

Talking therapies really do make a difference.

 

[Durlston]

Having read the post above, I presume the posts in between that I have not yet read have lanced this particular boil. So my post is edited. I really wasn't impressed, first read, though.

The world has changed. These days you aren't told to take a couple of asprin and pull yourself together.

However there is still a fear of showing 'weakness'. I'm quite chatty with my work colleagues, and endless chatter stopped me going under during the divorce and custody battle nearly 30 years ago. But there is a limit to what I feel comfortable sharing with people who might influence my work space. That is probably irrational, though.

Another point, the way we are brought up can be massively important. My parents were really not up to speed, and my relationship with the old man was poison. A kid aged 12-15 really shouldn't be hyperventilating with anger at night, with knife under his pillow, and ready to use it. Things like that are hard to assimilate. I just hope the kids I have brought up were treated better by me (pretty sure this is the case, fortunately). Blood's starting to boil now so I'd better go to another thread for a bit...

Judging by all your posts and your kindness on here, I'm sure you brought your children up very well, Harry Wilson.

But sorry to hear about your troubled childhood mate. I was frequently in trouble at school - wish I'd learnt more and done better in my exams without messing about.

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

Judging by all your posts and your kindness on here, I'm sure you brought your children up very well, Harry Wilson.

But sorry to hear about your troubled childhood mate. I was frequently in trouble at school - wish I'd learnt more and done better in my exams without messing about.

Thanks. Appreciated.

I hope your life has panned out well despite the schooldaze.

I have found that with time, at least in my case, you develop 'work-arounds' for any setbacks or adverse experiences. Neverthelesst took me until my late 30s to learn how to not 'go off one' with insufficient justification, due to my fulminating anger. I met up recently with someone who tought me (at uni) 35 years ago. He said I was an 'angry young man' Lol! Anyway, my teenage years left me with a loathing and extreme opposition to bullying (especially psychological), which can't be a bad thing. Give me another 20 years and I might even start learning how to tolerate fools gladly. Well....maybe not, lol! In any case I'll probably be long dead by then....(80+?...our lot don't make old bones).

All the best

 

[Weststander]

Had a few instances over the past few decades, most recently down to a bullying boss who I escaped from by jumping to a failing business via another non-starter (so a few years of hell).
Starting to come out the other side with the help of counselling... if you are local the Rock Clinic have two banches in Brighton (one near Hove border and one Kemptown side). Both provide private counselling services but at reasonable rates and you will be seen, assessed and assigned an appropriate counsellor far quicker than the NHS can arrange.

Talking therapies really do make a difference.

Great post. I have friends who used the services of the Rock Clinic, as well taking suitable anti-depressants, who came out of the lowest ebbs stronger and happier. There’s no magic bullet. Many people would feel low to melancholy at times; meds and the talking therapies combined ameliorate the lows and make living a happier condition for more of the time.

 

[AmexRuislip]

Chris Kirkland talking about depression.

I know it's Talk Sport.
But listening to Chris Kirkland talking about his battles with depression, brings it all home, to how life is so precious.
Take time to listen, if you want to

https://talksport.com/radio/listen-again/1528646400

https://talksport.com/football/chri...d-admits-he-contemplated-suicide-180610285800

 

[Don Tmatter]

Saw somewhere that the reason Dean Cox wasn’t playing for Crawley most of last season was that he was suffering from depression/anxiety issues.

 

[fozzie's paper boy]

I don’t post much on NSC, but this is an inspiring thread, and a reminder both of how decent people are in general and also for those of us living with depression that we definitely are not alone.

I’m just coming out of my second significant bout of depression in the last few years, and while I’m cautious about concluding anything other than that things are feeling better at the moment a few things have really helped me:

• Talking about it - at home and at work, and telling my boss.
• Seeing my GP and going on meds - Sertraline since Dec last year
• Cutting out booze - no alcohol in 2018, and while I have the occasional pang I really don’t miss it and feel much better for it. Have also cut down on caffeine.
• Keeping a diary - recapping the day in writing before I go to bed helps settle things and set me up for a decent night’s sleep
• Getting into more of a routine - sounds stupid but getting out of bed and having a shower first thing every day has made me much less likely to head back to bed. Having breakfast too has been another blindingly obvious thing to do
• Meditation - was hugely sceptical about this, and tried and gave up a few times, then a fried recommended a book called “10% Happier” by Dan Harris which is just brilliant, and now I’m hooked.

I keep telling myself that I also need to factor exercise in but haven’t managed that yet. These are just things that worked for me, it really is a case of trying some things out for yourself and seeing what makes a difference. Best of luck to all on here, and thanks, it’s been great reading through this thread.

 

[Weststander]

I don’t post much on NSC, but this is an inspiring thread, and a reminder both of how decent people are in general and also for those of us living with depression that we definitely are not alone.

I’m just coming out of my second significant bout of depression in the last few years, and while I’m cautious about concluding anything other than that things are feeling better at the moment a few things have really helped me:

• Talking about it - at home and at work, and telling my boss.
• Seeing my GP and going on meds - Sertraline since Dec last year
• Cutting out booze - no alcohol in 2018, and while I have the occasional pang I really don’t miss it and feel much better for it. Have also cut down on caffeine.
• Keeping a diary - recapping the day in writing before I go to bed helps settle things and set me up for a decent night’s sleep
• Getting into more of a routine - sounds stupid but getting out of bed and having a shower first thing every day has made me much less likely to head back to bed. Having breakfast too has been another blindingly obvious thing to do
• Meditation - was hugely sceptical about this, and tried and gave up a few times, then a fried recommended a book called “10% Happier” by Dan Harris which is just brilliant, and now I’m hooked.

I keep telling myself that I also need to factor exercise in but haven’t managed that yet. These are just things that worked for me, it really is a case of trying some things out for yourself and seeing what makes a difference. Best of luck to all on here, and thanks, it’s been great reading through this thread.

Great post.

A close relative of mine takes Sertraline, and we say that it's prevented their potential suicide.

With the telling the boss bit, I'm glad it worked for you. For another perspective, I worked somewhere where the scheming owner seized upon any members of staff or busness partners revealing mental illness, as a weakness to then bully them and ease them out of the organisation. He had no time for 'weak' people. Nice bloke. I only mention this as a word of caution for any sufferer who wouldn't be able to trust their boss or gossipy colleagues.

Exercise - you've done the right thing for you at the moment. There's no point making it another pressure, to beat yourself up over not exercising. Being kind to yourself.

Another technique is to give yourself one pleasurable thing to look forward to each day. This can anything like watching a TV prog or movie you love, a nice coffee out, anything really.

 

[crabface]

• Meditation - was hugely sceptical about this, and tried and gave up a few times, then a fried recommended a book called “10% Happier” by Dan Harris which is just brilliant, and now I’m hooked.

I second this, i was similar, a friend recommended it and lent me a book. I originally rubbished the idea, thinking it was some hippy nonsense, but eventually came round to giving it a try and it is fantastic.

 

[m20gull]

I second this, i was similar, a friend recommended it and lent me a book. I originally rubbished the idea, thinking it was some hippy nonsense, but eventually came round to giving it a try and it is fantastic.

I use a range of guided meditation apps from Meditiation Oasis and they really help.

 

[pearl]

I don’t post much on NSC, but this is an inspiring thread, and a reminder both of how decent people are in general and also for those of us living with depression that we definitely are not alone.

I’m just coming out of my second significant bout of depression in the last few years, and while I’m cautious about concluding anything other than that things are feeling better at the moment a few things have really helped me:

• Talking about it - at home and at work, and telling my boss.
• Seeing my GP and going on meds - Sertraline since Dec last year
• Cutting out booze - no alcohol in 2018, and while I have the occasional pang I really don’t miss it and feel much better for it. Have also cut down on caffeine.
• Keeping a diary - recapping the day in writing before I go to bed helps settle things and set me up for a decent night’s sleep
• Getting into more of a routine - sounds stupid but getting out of bed and having a shower first thing every day has made me much less likely to head back to bed. Having breakfast too has been another blindingly obvious thing to do
• Meditation - was hugely sceptical about this, and tried and gave up a few times, then a fried recommended a book called “10% Happier” by Dan Harris which is just brilliant, and now I’m hooked.

I keep telling myself that I also need to factor exercise in but haven’t managed that yet. These are just things that worked for me, it really is a case of trying some things out for yourself and seeing what makes a difference. Best of luck to all on here, and thanks, it’s been great reading through this thread.

Thanks for posting. You don't have to go to the gym or whatever to exercise. I enjoy just going out for a walk and observing my surroundings, listening to birdsong (not an ipod) .... people watching. Best wishes

 

[desprateseagull]

Thank you for (most) of the replies, and giving your own stories. I was in 2 minds whether to do my original post, but glad I did.

Talking through stuff with my GP has been very helpful.

Little steps being taking, to break this mood, which I think I had been ignoring for too long.

And btw, the 'desprate' (with typo!) in my name only relates to search for match tickets!

 

[desprateseagull]

I meant to say I my earlier post DO NOT RESORT TO ALCOHOL as as answer to your problems. Beer will give a temporary lift but in the morning you'll be ever deeper in your gloom.

Sent from my SM-G925F using Tapatalk

Not had a drop, since holidays. mood dropped after i got back.

 

[desprateseagull]

Anyone else getting a bit concerned that desprateseagull hasn't been on NSC since his opening post on this thread on Thursday night?

Please log in mate. Your PM box might be pretty full. And also hope you're feeling a lot better.

Still here- had a break from the internet.

 

[DJ NOBO]

Still here- had a break from the internet.

Wise move

 

[Ludensian Gull]

Feeling really down tonight, don't know why ,have been drinking probably doesn't help . Sorry to post this by it needed to tell someone .

 

[Johnnyboy]

Sorry to hear mate. Pm me and I’ll send you my mobile number if you’d like to chat.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[PILTDOWN MAN]

Feeling really down tonight, don't know why ,have been drinking probably doesn't help . Sorry to post this by it needed to tell someone .

Keep talking/posting we are here to listen

 

[AWAYDAY]

Counselling works

 

[Albion my Albion]

Depression--something many Aussie, Nigerian, Peruvian, etc. fans have to deal with this morning since their national teams have been knocked out of the WC.