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Bell Cheeses at work



Uncle Buck

Ghost Writer
Jul 7, 2003
28,075
:lolol:

That's a top quality, passive-aggressive email. Particularly liking the sarcastic "borrowed" in quotes.

If you could somehow coordinate everyone in the company replying and claiming responsibility, that would be tremendous.

To be fair, this particular creature takes pride in send company wide emails about people using tea towels as clothes and not filling the kettle up.

So this special has just caused a lot of sneering.
 




Uncle Buck

Ghost Writer
Jul 7, 2003
28,075
This was another classic, but was not sent to all, just those she suspected;

Dear All,

A question….would you really leave your kitchen at home in such a mess……? Regardless of any significant other you may have, I think not, so why would you dump spoons and crockery in the sink for someone else to wash up…..

Stop being lazy and wash up your own used items.

No-one is here to baby or mother any of you….

The red towels are for wiping up crockery and utensils NOT for wiping the work surfaces down, that’s why the J cloths were bought, or for drying your hands

Also, please refill the kettles and turn on, this saves time for the next person making around…

You all know who’s responsible, so please whoever has left the mugs and added over the last 2 days the spoons, please go and wash them up and when dry put in the black mug by the plugs, thank you.

I know I’ve been here only 5 weeks, and it would be nice not to nag and have clean stuff to use every day, so thank you in anticipation of your co-operation.
 


Papa Lazarou

Living in a De Zerbi wonderland
Jul 7, 2003
19,365
Worthing
This was another classic, but was not sent to all, just those she suspected;

Dear All,

A question….would you really leave your kitchen at home in such a mess……? Regardless of any significant other you may have, I think not, so why would you dump spoons and crockery in the sink for someone else to wash up…..

Stop being lazy and wash up your own used items.

No-one is here to baby or mother any of you….

The red towels are for wiping up crockery and utensils NOT for wiping the work surfaces down, that’s why the J cloths were bought, or for drying your hands

Also, please refill the kettles and turn on, this saves time for the next person making around…

You all know who’s responsible, so please whoever has left the mugs and added over the last 2 days the spoons, please go and wash them up and when dry put in the black mug by the plugs, thank you.

I know I’ve been here only 5 weeks, and it would be nice not to nag and have clean stuff to use every day, so thank you in anticipation of your co-operation.

F88k me, only there 5 weeks, and sending THAT?!?

How to make friends.

There's huge potential to wind her up massively
 




Papa Lazarou

Living in a De Zerbi wonderland
Jul 7, 2003
19,365
Worthing
The problem with that is, it means interacting with them as I try and talk to nobody here all the time, that becomes an issue.

You don't need to talk to perform the wind-up... let your actions speak louder than words.
 




Martlet

Well-known member
Jul 15, 2003
687
We've just had the results of our annual staff survey through. Apparently, as leaders of the business, we need to spend more time "reimagining the possible".

Needless to say, I've decided to cancel my next three client meetings to free up some serious reimagining time......
 


hans kraay fan club

The voice of reason.
Helpful Moderator
Mar 16, 2005
62,763
Chandlers Ford
F88k me, only there 5 weeks, and sending THAT?!?

How to make friends.

There's huge potential to wind her up massively

Indeed. What an absolute tw4t.

And what's this 'please fill and turn on the kettles' for the next person. How dreadfully WASTEFUL. What if nobody wants tea in the following few minutes? Waste of energy and company money, not to mention your environmental footprint. I say you should have her sacked immediately.
 






Badger

NOT the Honey Badger
NSC Patron
May 8, 2007
13,108
Toronto
This was another classic, but was not sent to all, just those she suspected;

Dear All,

A question….would you really leave your kitchen at home in such a mess……? Regardless of any significant other you may have, I think not, so why would you dump spoons and crockery in the sink for someone else to wash up…..

Stop being lazy and wash up your own used items.

No-one is here to baby or mother any of you….

The red towels are for wiping up crockery and utensils NOT for wiping the work surfaces down, that’s why the J cloths were bought, or for drying your hands

Also, please refill the kettles and turn on, this saves time for the next person making around…

You all know who’s responsible, so please whoever has left the mugs and added over the last 2 days the spoons, please go and wash them up and when dry put in the black mug by the plugs, thank you.

I know I’ve been here only 5 weeks, and it would be nice not to nag and have clean stuff to use every day, so thank you in anticipation of your co-operation.

I assume your work kitchen is PLASTERED with laminated "reminder" signs?
 




hans kraay fan club

The voice of reason.
Helpful Moderator
Mar 16, 2005
62,763
Chandlers Ford
Now we are getting boards about how to save money and help profit share.

1. Stop wasting laminating sheets.
2. Stop wasting blu-tack
3. Stop turning the ****ing kettle on, just in case someone wants it, in a bit.
4. Stop wasting your work time writing stupid passive-aggressive nagging e-mails.
5. Stop wasting everyone else's work time by sending them to us all.
6. You tw4t
 




Uncle Buck

Ghost Writer
Jul 7, 2003
28,075
1. Stop wasting laminating sheets.
2. Stop wasting blu-tack
3. Stop turning the ****ing kettle on, just in case someone wants it, in a bit.
4. Stop wasting your work time writing stupid passive-aggressive nagging e-mails.
5. Stop wasting everyone else's work time by sending them to us all.
6. You tw4t

Or just ignore as per normal.

Work from home as much as possible and come in to do expenses only...
 








BBassic

I changed this.
Jul 28, 2011
13,060
Today's company wide email from resident loon;

Hi Chaps,

Please could you remember to wash any mugs or glasses used when you have guests, and not leave them in the sink for others to do…..

While you at it, wash the bloody spoons too!!

Gotta say, I'm siding with the loon on this. It takes literally seconds to give your cup/plate/cutlery a quick rinse.
 






Gwylan

Well-known member
Jul 5, 2003
31,830
Uffern
To be fair, this particular creature takes pride in send company wide emails about people using tea towels as clothes

I think you have to say more about this: how are people wearing tea towels? Are they being deployed as bandanas? As skirts? As scarves? I have visions of troupes of her fellow workers all strutting around the office with tea towels wrapped round them. I think you need to explain yourself
 




Uncle Buck

Ghost Writer
Jul 7, 2003
28,075
I think you have to say more about this: how are people wearing tea towels? Are they being deployed as bandanas? As skirts? As scarves? I have visions of troupes of her fellow workers all strutting around the office with tea towels wrapped round them. I think you need to explain yourself

I think the spelling mistake says all you need to know on this one.
 


Napper

Well-known member
Jul 9, 2003
24,456
Sussex
Very noble to take responsibility of the kitchen but really !?

I honestly think if someone at my place started all that within 6 weeks of being here they would be odds on NOT to pass the probation period.

DO SOME WORK
 


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