[Brighton] Being called ' Mate'. When is it ok?

[Rogero]

Fine when it is a mate saying it. But is it ok for shopworkers, bar staff and waiters to call you it. Should a waiter say it ? Well. I don't like it.
How do you feel?

 

[Creaky]

Personally I prefer to be called ‘mate’ rather than ‘sir’.

 

[BN9 BHA]

Doesn't bother me mate.

 

[easynow]

Waste of energy to care about stuff like this, mate.

 

[Brighton Mod]

Personally I prefer to be called ‘mate’ rather than ‘sir’.

I reckon its a Brighton thing, when I joined the army in the early eighties many didnt quite get it, apart from the fact that the Scottish, Welsh, Irish, West Country, Midlands, Geordies, East anglians etc all thought I was from London.
I no longer live in Brighton and now the word used is fella, its not and neither is mate a first person name but a third person term. Such as tu and vous in French, if it offends anyone, just communicate that to the sender of the term, simples.

 

[Meade's Ball]

I hate being called BUDDY. Get it occasionally on the blower at work, and the next time it happens, world, I’ll hang up.

 

[Juan Albion]

It can feel really weird. I play online scrabble against an Irish nurse and she calls me 'mate' all the time.

 

[Bry Nylon]

I play online scrabble against an Irish nurse and she calls me 'mate' all the time.

8 points.

 

[AmexRuislip]

It can feel really weird. I play online scrabble against an Irish nurse and she calls me 'mate' all the time.

Are you sure she really is an Irish nurse

 

[Rogero]

You most likely don't like it because of a socially learned feeling of superiority you have over shopworkers, bar staff and waiters.

When someone calls another person 'mate' they are expressing a desire to form a bond with a fellow human being, in a very British way. It's usually a very positive social interaction, so it's a shame that you dislike it, or that you feel you are superior to them, purely on the basis that they are people working in these types of jobs.

If they were working in professions that you respected more, then you would surely not feel such contempt towards them calling you 'mate'.

I think you should reflect on this, and consider that we are all equal despite the professions that we have. Perhaps them calling you 'mate' is a compliment that you are worthy of their empathy.. and maybe consider calling them 'mate' back. It might make them feel good.

Perhaps more of an age thing maybe.

 

[timbha]

You most likely don't like it because of a socially learned feeling of superiority you have over shopworkers, bar staff and waiters.

When someone calls another person 'mate' they are expressing a desire to form a bond with a fellow human being, in a very British way. It's usually a very positive social interaction, so it's a shame that you dislike it, or that you feel you are superior to them, purely on the basis that they are people working in these types of jobs.

If they were working in professions that you respected more, then you would surely not feel such contempt towards them calling you 'mate'.

I think you should reflect on this, and consider that we are all equal despite the professions that we have. Perhaps consider them calling you 'mate' is a compliment that you are worthy of their empathy.. and maybe consider calling them 'mate' back. It might make them feel good.

I wouldn’t want my GP or the GP’s Receptionist to call me mate, and I certainly wouldn’t call them that even if they were my mates. Being called Bud or Buddy makes me feel like an effing idiot

 

[LVGull]

Fine when it is a mate saying it. But is it ok for shopworkers, bar staff and waiters to call you it. Should a waiter say it ? Well. I don't like it.
How do you feel?

How about getting called darling, babe, lovely ffs.

 

[jonnyrovers]

You most likely don't like it because of a socially learned feeling of superiority you have over shopworkers, bar staff and waiters.

When someone calls another person 'mate' they are expressing a desire to form a bond with a fellow human being, in a very British way. It's usually a very positive social interaction, so it's a shame that you dislike it, or that you feel you are superior to them, purely on the basis that they are people working in these types of jobs.

If they were working in professions that you respected more, then you would surely not feel such contempt towards them calling you 'mate'.

I think you should reflect on this, and consider that we are all equal despite the professions that we have. Perhaps them calling you 'mate' is a compliment that you are worthy of their empathy.. and maybe consider calling them 'mate' back. It might make them feel good.

If I say 'mate' it's because I can't remember your name. If someone says 'mate' to me I assume it's because they can't remember my name. My bias is informed by my own failings.

I make judgements about friends and colleagues based entirely upon the quality of their interactions with service staff.

Not sure where I'm going with this...

 

[Luke93]

8 points.

Was the 'A' on a double scoring square?

 

[Rogero]

How about getting called darling, babe, lovely ffs.

Best not to say anything like that. Just good morning would do. Not good morning Ducky.

 

[Rambo]

There is a book called 'Don't Sweat the Small Stuff'. Go read it.

 

[jonny.rainbow]

Being called 'Mate'. When is it okay?

When you're being spoken to my your colleague on a ship?

 

[timbha]

There is a book called 'Don't Sweat the Small Stuff'. Go read it.

Isn’t that an oxymoron?

 

[LamieRobertson]

Are you sure she really is an Irish nurse

Is he sure it’s a she

 

[AmexRuislip]

Is he sure it’s a she

Or they could be some hairy assed red neck, online in the library, playing scrabble in Rikers Island prison