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Incidentally ... anyone who thinks that SASTA and Network Rail are the champions at ****ing up travel arrangements should see what the combination of Highways England and Balfour Beattie is capable of.

I strongly advise people not to try this if you're travelling eastwards. When you get to Seaford, carry on along the A259 to Eastbourne.

As a local, I can report that this is a complete closure of the road in both directions - starting at about 8pm. Local traffic is able to get to local destinations only with the assistance of an escort (which requires a wait of up to 20 minutes, before it shows up, with a man who will dismantle...

Presumably they need to ensure that they can finish the keg before it goes completely rancid. An offer like this every year or so is probably the best way to get rid of the stuff.

The increasing number of evening games will obviously have an impact on families with children's season tickets where the kids are too young to endure the late bedtimes that inevitably accompany a night time kick-off. The Reading system (which allows unlimited upgrades for evening games and...

The worst that can happen today is that Derby beat Wolves and we drop to fifth in the table. Any other result keeps us in fourth place and none of the other games will affect our current position. That said, defeats for all the top clubs will be better than victories or draws.

SASTA ... Seagulls are sorry to announce ...? Sky are sorry to announce ...?

The torturer and human rights abuser from Bahrain seems to be the favourite to win the FIFA job. Eurovision has to go to the UKIP choice, shirley? "When You Go", not "You're Not Alone"

People seem to be ignoring the most important feature of this referendum. A vote for IN means "I want George Osborne to be the next prime minister" A vote for NO means "I want Boris Johnson to be the next prime minister". The entire campaign so far has been focused on that one issue. The...

I make a point of only buying trainers if they are plain white, show no manufacturer's name, and cost less than £10. The only let down I've ever had was when I bought a pair where the left trainer had been made in Vietnam and the right trainer was made in Malaysia. In every other respect...

Setting up my home office in what had been the third bedroom got me into deep trouble with the young Miss Bracknell (who had moved out a long time earlier):- "What the hell have you done to my bedroom?"

So now they can get on and vote Sheikh Salman bin Ebrahim al-Khalifa into Blatter's old job. The man responsible for imprisoning and torturing footballers in Bahrein for doing no more than expressing opposition to the despotic ruling family.

You could, of course, recoup the money that you have lost by trying the same trick yourself. It might impact upon your own credit rating, of course, but that's only a problem if you abandon this new approach to financial management.

Wales 15 Scotland 20 England 20

What do you mean - "out of season PANTO"? I will miss the game on Monday, because I will be performing in Cinderella at the Lewes Arms.

All that tells us that you don't move in clay pigeon shooting circles. I have a mate who is a European toad-in-the-hole champion. I don't expect you have heard of him, either - although he is more famous for doing other things.

He is alleged to have given the inquiry information about how the BBC dealt with abuse allegations that was not true.

Historically, business rates have just been collected by the Council, but the money has gone to the Government who have used it as if it was general taxation. The system is slowly changing, though, with local councils getting more control over the business rates that they collect from...

Of course you wouldn't be able to ask that question. You've got your Dimblebys muxed ip.

Indeed. It's about 1% of the Club's total income. I wish my council tax could be as low as that.