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I liked the Bee Gees song about decorating. 'It's just emulsion that's painting me over'

Much fascination here at the stable that you would arrive here with just a single post to tell us that someone else had reached their century. I declare you the Bill Frindall of NSC. Come join us in the cricket threads.

The irony being that they probably don't understand, or have never read, the novel. For, as I think I mentioned earlier, they are very much unwitting subjects. 'The horrible thing about the Two Minutes Hate was not that one was obliged to act a part, but, on the contrary, that it was impossible...

Was their any actual evidence that hotels were booked in advance, or did some random internet account mention it and you took it as read ?

I'd love to have been at that reading of last will and testimony.

@Guinness Boy once had a cat called 'Little Fucker' I shit you not.

No, they're away at Oxford

I swear this is Knuckle Draggers version of the Radio 1 Roadshow. Will Smiley Miley be there ? 'Can you guess how many arrests there have been in the last 24 hours ?' We've already got Bits n' Pieces. Why not fairground games ? Some fool stand there and see if you can hit him in goolies with a...

Can anyone tell me verified information about what is actually happening in town tomorrow ? I have staff concerns and want to make sure folk can avoid the area.

Now listen, I am the most Stupid of the Wooshed. I am King Woosh. I have been wooshed more times than the most wooshed person in Wooshland. But I am not falling for this one.

I'd let her off. I think the permanent humiliation of being a 'meme' till history ends is enough.

Some of my best friends are hoity-toitys.

Always remember that these predictions are no more than the verdict of a couple of people in an office. I never take notice.

Should it now be singular... Leanne's removed.

Plymouth Argyle v Exeter City was always a strange fixture.

Those words could easily be moved around for the same effect.

Their local rivals, Wealdstone, appear to think not.

If it wasn't you, I would just say that there is no cricket team, you stopped playing years ago, and decided to work on a village Eastenders script.

Euan has a secret fetish. He wants a horny policeman to turn up in the early hours and handcuff him. That's all well and good. But it's the second part he could have avoided if he'd just gone on Gaydar instead. Now he's going to get Big Bill in cell 24765 as part of the deal.

I can't see any evidence that there is an 'EDL' protest taking place.