[Humour] Joke of the day

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Not Andy Naylor

Not Andy Naylor

Well-known member
Dec 12, 2007
8,996
Seven Dials
I'm very confused. Which joke is the joke of the day, the blonde one or the duck one? And is this the same as the joke du jour?

On the subject of the blonde joke, if the pilot is prepared to lie to a passenger so blatantly, how can he be trusted to fly a plane, which requires honest communication with the co-pilot and the ground? Very worrying.
 






Simster

Simster

"the man's an arse"
Jul 7, 2003
54,953
Surrey
Not Andy Naylor said:
I'm very confused. Which joke is the joke of the day, the blonde one or the duck one? And is this the same as the joke du jour?

On the subject of the blonde joke, if the pilot is prepared to lie to a passenger so blatantly, how can he be trusted to fly a plane, which requires honest communication with the co-pilot and the ground? Very worrying.
Click to expand...
I think I can help here. The pilot lied as a means to an end - that end being to get her to sit in standard class without continuing to make a scene in first class. He probably wouldn't lie to his co-pilot or ground control without very good reason such as a hijacker holding him at gun point and forcing him to lie over the radio, or alternatively telling his co-pilot that the reason he has a rich tea biscuit is that there were no bourbons left, knowing full well he'd eaten the bourbons himself when the co-pilot was in the toilet.
 


jcdenton08

jcdenton08

Offended Liver Sausage
NSC Patron
Oct 17, 2008
14,562
Simster said:
I think I can help here. The pilot lied as a means to an end - that end being to get her to sit in standard class without continuing to make a scene in first class. He probably wouldn't lie to his co-pilot or ground control without very good reason such as a hijacker holding him at gun point and forcing him to lie over the radio, or alternatively telling his co-pilot that the reason he has a rich tea biscuit is that there were no bourbons left, knowing full well he'd eaten the bourbons himself when the co-pilot was in the toilet.
Click to expand...
It really does give a fascinating insight into the complex cockpit politics in the aeronautical industry, a debate I feel has been pushed to the back burner for far too long.
 


Albion my Albion

Albion my Albion

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Feb 6, 2016
19,663
Indiana, USA
1723097880321.png



What are we going to do with you guys? Inject you with bleach?
 




E

essbee1

Well-known member
Jun 25, 2014
4,733
Tony Towner's Fridge said:
I just love duck jokes. I have bookshelves full of them and on my main room wall I have over 15,000 duck jokes scribbled down.

I suppose I am a quack addict?


TNBA

TTF
Click to expand...
Wouldn't a better joke have been that you had thousands of books on bottoms etc? Then
the crack addict joke would have worked. I'm speaking as someone who is exceptionally
witty.
 


Tony Towner's Fridge

Tony Towner's Fridge

Well-known member
Aug 22, 2003
5,547
GLASGOW,SCOTLAND,UK
essbee1 said:
Wouldn't a better joke have been that you had thousands of books on bottoms etc? Then
the crack addict joke would have worked. I'm speaking as someone who is exceptionally
witty.
Click to expand...
Well there's no way I am going to wipe out a lifetime of accumulated jokes, just to change the joke theme. Who would foot the bill?


TNBA

TTF
 


AmexRuislip

AmexRuislip

Retired Spy 🕵️‍♂️
Feb 2, 2014
34,776
Ruislip
A Russian agent arrives at a small Welsh station and asks for Mr Jones. “Well,” says the stationmaster, “there’s Jones the Milk, Jones the Meat, Jones the Flowers, Jones the Undertaker. In fact, my name’s Jones.” The agent whispers to him, “The eagle doesn’t walk over the mountain.”



























“Ah,” says the stationmaster, “you want Jones the Spy.”
 
Last edited:




Questions

Questions

Habitual User
Oct 18, 2006
25,512
Worthing
I love crispy duck.
I had a double portion last night on the way home.
Those two statements are connected btw
 


Coldeanseagull

Coldeanseagull

Opinionated
Mar 13, 2013
8,361
Coldean
AmexRuislip said:
A Russian agent arrives at a small Welsh station and asks for Mr Jones. “Well,” says the stationmaster, “there’s Jones the Milk, Jones the Meat, Jones the Flowers, Jones the Undertaker. In fact, my name’s Jones.” The agent whispers to him, “The eagle doesn’t walk over the mountain.”




























“Ah,” says the stationmaster, “you want Jones the Spy.”
Click to expand...
:lolol: Good one. Can't see what it says, as It's in white print on a white back ground....but I'm sure it's funny

Edit
Highlighted the text and was able to read it....whats the matter with you? there's no ducks involved :facepalm:
 


AmexRuislip

AmexRuislip

Retired Spy 🕵️‍♂️
Feb 2, 2014
34,776
Ruislip
Coldeanseagull said:
:lolol: Good one. Can't see what it says, as It's in white print on a white back ground....but I'm sure it's funny

Edit
Highlighted the text and was able to read it....whats the matter with you? there's no ducks involved :facepalm:
Click to expand...
I copied and pasted from a website for blind people :facepalm::lol:
 














Insel affe

Insel affe

HellBilly
Feb 23, 2009
24,344
Brighton factually.....
How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Three. The left ear, the right ear, and the final front-ear.
 


Lyndhurst 14

Lyndhurst 14

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2008
5,243
2 years ago I joined a support group for procrastinators. We have yet to meet up.
 


Is it PotG?

Is it PotG?

Thrifty non-licker
Feb 20, 2017
25,481
Sussex by the Sea
Doesn't sound like much of a support group if you can't even be bothered to meet up after that period of time.
I'd bin the idea.
 




Mr Bridger

Mr Bridger

Sound of the suburbs
Feb 25, 2013
4,756
Earth
I organised a lecture on the issues surrounding erectile dysfunction but it was a flop, nobody came.
 




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