Would you Do Cher Lloyd in the Swagger Jagger?

[Mackenzie]

I don't think I'd be able to keep up with her.

 

[TheBlueAndWhiteStrips]

She is a chavvy irritating talentless wannabe gangster.



I suspect the best bit would be wiping your cock on her curtains on the way out.

And then shitting in her handbag

 

[Twinkle Toes]

I read a Swagger Jacker is someone who steals one's look and grabs. She (or whoever wrote it for her) then got it wrong

Ahhhhhh, cheers for the translation keaton. It all sounds like a right bunch of ol' bollards to me tbh. The late, great, Lenny Peters must be turning in his grave (unless he was cremeted of course).

 

[The Wookiee]

I would rather stick it in a tigers mouth !

 

[Acker79]

What little I've heard of that song sounds a lot like build a bonfire.

 

[Uncle C]

Well I rather like it.

 

[Cypriot-Seagull]

If she was wearing a Brighton shirt and sang "your f*cking brilliant" to me then YES

 

[DarrenFreemansPerm]

Tight

 

[TheBlueAndWhiteStrips]

What little I've heard of that song sounds a lot like build a bonfire.

It is, the chorus to Swagger Jagger is My Darling Clementine. As is Build a Bonfire.

 

[JBizzle]

What - in the name of all that is Holy - is the Swagger Jagger?!

Is it Yoofspeak or summut??

Swagger Jagger is a rip off of "Oh my darling Clementine".

 

[xenophon]

A skip rat

 

[Albumen]

Never heard of her but it looks like her

It looks female so I probably would.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

That song is so SHITE. Being sung by a fat-arsed chav midget doesn't exactly help either. No offense.

 

[Knightsworld]

That song is so SHITE. Being sung by a fat-arsed chav midget doesn't exactly help either. No offense.

You missed out Cheryl f***ing Cole wannabe

 

[Prodigal Son]

She is a chavvy irritating talentless wannabe gangster.



I suspect the best bit would be wiping your cock on her curtains on the way out.

Beef ones or the ones that hang in the window?

 

[Buzzer]

I've considered her odd looks, I've considered the way she carries herself with an awful dress sense, her chav accent, her pikey background and her very mediocre talent, weighed up all those things but she has a fanny so I probably would. Bet it's like a paper cut.

 

[Silent Bob]

She looks wierd and sshe doesn't make music so much as ear cancer.

But I defs would.

 

[Mellotron]

People label songs casually as "the worst thing I've ever heard", but I GENUINELY think Swagger Jagger could stake a claim for being THE WORST SONG OF ALL TIME.

It's a freakish mutant, it sounds like random noises thrown together to satisfy youngsters short attention spans. It sounds like the product of marketing people in a room going "right, what's cool? Twitter! Dancehall! Club music!" - and just throwing it all into a DISGUSTING BROTH without stopping to actually see whether it hangs together as a SONG.

Then getting Cheryl Kerl's EVIL younger sister to shout/rap/not sing the words.

 

[Dr Q]

Well I rather like it.

First time I've heard it. What an absolute heap of shit!

 

[JJ McClure]

The song is absolute garbage, however there is still something about her that makes me think shes fit.