Tony Meolas Loan Spell
Slut Faced Whores
Would agree with this. Those who I know got married "young" certainly are not together now, yet those I know who got married in their 30's are still going strong.
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Will 'marriage' one day be a thing of the past?
- Thread starter Wilko
- Start date
Would agree with this. Those who I know got married "young" certainly are not together now, yet those I know who got married in their 30's are still going strong.
I said, "men tend" to be better off. There will always be examples where that's not the case. It's like people saying that smoking's not dangerous because their grandfather smoked 40 a day and lived until he was 90 - you have to look at general trends.
Publius Ovidius
Well-known member
my wedding anniversary is on the 17th and it is our 28th. we married young and i dont think that was a problem at all
bhaexpress
New member
The thing far too many people marry in haste (I know from my own mistakes). The issue is that people, married or not, fail to work at relationships and will not compromise. Having a 'bit of paper' or not will never change that. However, congrats anyway, well done. Your missus must be a very tolerant woman !
Trufflehound
Re-enfranchised
So the heirarchy in the 'well off' stakes after divorce is:
Slut-faced whores
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Men
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Women
Tony Meolas Loan Spell
Slut Faced Whores
- Thread starter
- #107
In many of these cases the man may be better off financially but I would hardly say that leaving the family house and kids makes him 'better off' as seems to be the story in most cases,
Well quite. In fact, some of the references do say that richer but less happy - which was something that I mentioned in my own case.
I was not making a value judgment as to whether men would be happier, but whether they'd be richer. The latter is generally true, the former is generally not.
- Thread starter
- #109
Indeed. Just read through all these and am confused as to how it is felt the female is better off:
Option 1) See a 25% increase in income but you have to leave the family home, leave your kids and pay maintenance
Option 2) See an 11% fall in income but get to stay in the family home with the children.
Personally if i was in that position I would be delighted with option 2.
- Thread starter
- #110
I would also add that these look at finance IMMEDIATLY after the divorce. What about when/if she meets a new fella? The former husband gets a slight reduction in paying maintenance whilst she is left with the house, the kids, a new income plus the maintenance from her former husband - not bad on her part!
Here's what one of the studies said.
Jenkins's research found that the incomes of "separating husbands" rise "immediately and continuously" in the years following a marital split. He found that, when a man leaves a childless marriage, his income immediately rises by 25%. Women, however, suffer a sharp fall in income. Their financial position rarely reaches pre-split levels.
Jenkins combined data from 14 different British Household Panel Surveys over 1991 to 2004 with the findings from five European surveys. Recalculating the results using the formula by which the government measures poverty, he established new per capita incomes. Jenkins found that the positive effect on men's finances is so significant that divorce can even lift them out of poverty, while women are far more likely to be plunged into destitution. Separated women have a poverty rate of 27% - almost three times that of their former husbands."
You're also assuming that men pay maintenance, according to Jenkins' research "just 31% of separated mothers receive payment from the father of their children."
The government's own figures are that 34% of absent parents (virtually always fathers) don't pay maintenance, so Jenkins' figures could be high, although some of the discrepancy could be explained by the government's own figures counting only CPA payments - not all mothers go through CPA.
This is something I've looked at for a long time and there have been many surveys on this subject. I started getting interested as I know a few women who have really struggled after separating from their partners, I soon found out that that was the norm.
NMH
Banned
"Do you take this man/woman, in sickness and in health, in fatness and slovenliness if she/he can't be bothered to try and keep her/his act together even for personal health, and in menopause or mid-life crisis when nothing you say will be right or bearable?"
"not a chance"
The trouble with marriage is that it's really a waste of time. Nobody ever says, in the actual wedding; "no - actually I don't feel right about this and would rather not say 'I do'. Let's just have the reception party for everyone who attended, and take more time to give it some thought".
Thus you hear people say, after a marriage has gone down the tube; "I knew there was something not quite right, and I didn't think it was the right thing to do even at the time".
"not a chance"
The trouble with marriage is that it's really a waste of time. Nobody ever says, in the actual wedding; "no - actually I don't feel right about this and would rather not say 'I do'. Let's just have the reception party for everyone who attended, and take more time to give it some thought".
Thus you hear people say, after a marriage has gone down the tube; "I knew there was something not quite right, and I didn't think it was the right thing to do even at the time".