[Drinking] What makes a GOOD pub..?

[fat old seagull]

At least one old codger who has sat in the same spot and drunk the same drink since before the current landlord.

An old fashioned till operated by someone who does all the adding up in their head, none of this touchscreen crap.

The only substantial food available is ham sandwich or cheese sandwich. You cannot get a ham and cheese sandwich without buying one of each. They are already made and sitting under a glass cloche. They are not particularly tasty but are served immediately and cost a pound.

There should be a selection of the underworld from wide boys up to proper gangsters. They will all be perfectly friendly and even buy you the odd round. One without a nose for trouble would not really notice them, except when a couple of young men in smart shoes walk in when they roll their eyes. This is shortly followed by a barmaid saying "evening officers - will you be staying for a drink?"

They serve good beer - that this may also be real ale is incidental.

Lock-ins. With smoking.

An old brass with a mouth like a sailor.

An old fashioned jukebox that broke down years ago and they had the good sense to never repair.

Outside khazis. Reasonably clean, fully functioning and draughty.

Now that is a PROPER PUB ! Is there one like this left anywhere ?

 

[mikeyjh]

No kids. Nice lager.

 

[smudge]

No kids, no dogs, no druggies.

 

[Questions]

:

This is why Craft has it right in my opinion. I often need something more substantial than crisps and a scotch egg or some cheese fits the bill. If I want to have a proper meal then I go to a restaurant.

Well quite. Craft do get it about right. Anyway who has time to eat a meal in there with their beers to get through .

 

[Magicman]

As long as I am satisfied in the bum and mouth departments, I am happy.

The bulldog would suit you fine

 

[Nibble]

Nice folks behind the bar who are happy to chat while you're ordering.
Doesn't stink.
But for me, there's nothing better than a well kept pub garden, on a sunny afternoon with a few mates, getting that slow, gently sozzled drinking in the sun buzz on. Perfection.

 

[maltaseagull]

A real fire in the winter.
Landlord wears a shirt and tie.
Decent ales AND a decent selection of wines/spirits too.
Friendly and attractive barmaids (if they can boast a decent "top set", then so much the better).
Absolutely no mobile phone coverage whatsoever.
A selection of the days newspapers.

Black and white TV too?

 

[Gwylan]

George had the right idea

http://theorwellprize.co.uk/george-orwell/by-orwell/essays-and-other-works/the-moon-under-water/

 

[vegster]

Simply just having good beer. I can cope with all sorts of alleged "hardships " such as lack of seats, crap garden, lousy bar staff etc just so long as when you sup that first beer of the evening you get that Churchill moment, " Oh Yes !"

 

[mistahclarke]

For a long time the Dyke Tavern ticked all the boxes:
- Hot barmaids, some with great racks
- Happy hour Mon-Fri till 7 making pints £2.50
- Decent tunes at a good volume
- Good garden for better weather
- Near my house
- Could always get a seat

All got ruined when they went child-friendly.

 

[happypig]

For a long time the Dyke Tavern ticked all the boxes:
- Decent tunes at a good volume

That's all too subjective, what you think are decent tunes, I might think a bloody awful racket.

All got ruined when they went child-friendly.

Always does, I feel for your loss.

 

[wellquickwoody]

A footrail and coat hooks around and under the bar.

 

[SouthCoastOwl]

No mobile phone coverage.
Pub cat.
Decent ale.

 

[Notters]

Bitter, Mild and Old.

 

[looney]

1. Decent beer including guest beers.

2. Bar staff that know the difference between a straight glass and jug and what they actually are.

3. Landlord smart enough to train the 90s kids/barstaff to point 2, as they tend to be 1 generation deep.

4. Food but basic, Pickled egg, onion and packet of crisps count as a meal.

5. If fruit machines then their noise turned off, ditto dukeboxes.

6. Friendly regulars, not like the slaughtered lamb in the American Werewolf in London.

 

[Nibble]

Craft has food right. In fact it's a pretty nice pub all round. If it had a decent outside area it's be perfect.

 

[crodonilson]

My criteria:

A pretty barmaid
Good quality beer
A jukebox
A pool table/dart board
(In the Summer) A beer garden
(In the Winter) A log fire

 

[brighton bluenose]

Four pages and not a single mention of DECENT CRUMPET amongst the regulars!!

 

[Questions]

Craft has food right. In fact it's a pretty nice pub all round. If it had a decent outside area it's be perfect.

That is the one thing that let's it down. My local in Worthing doesn't have a garden either and I miss that on a summers evening. Luckily my Shoreham pub the Welly does have one.

 

[Nibble]

That is the one thing that let's it down. My local in Worthing doesn't have a garden either and I miss that on a summers evening. Luckily my Shoreham pub the Welly does have one.

It certainly makes a difference, Shoreham has some cracking beer gardens.