The works Christmas party

[Racek]

Anyone got any good/embarrassing stories of colleagues making a fool of themselves at the Christmas party?

We had a girl from HR who got her titis out at last years party. She would not come back to work after that. It was a shame as everyone loved her tits.

 

[The Antikythera Mechanism]

[MENTION=221]Beeneys gloves[/MENTION]

 

[daveinprague]

Some member of staff threw a table off the balcony at the company party last year injuring several people...surprisingly he was sacked.

 

[Gazwag]

There was one a few years ago posted on here, can't remember who that was at the moment


Edit: Here it is An emotional apology to all.

 

[Publius Ovidius]

one of our guys punched a wall and abused senior management at a top London hotel and was aked to leave....suprisingly he is still here. Also one bloke said to our CEO " You look like a prize c***" ( he was wearing a "festive" waistcoat.) He is also still here.

 

[The Antikythera Mechanism]

[MENTION=221]Beeneys gloves[/MENTION]

Bloody hell, I got my late 80's, early 90's goalkeepers and goal keeping apparel mixed up - Beeneys Gloves, Digweeds Trousers. D'oh

 

[Durlston]

Everybody behaved themselves at our Christmas do on Tuesday night. It was more of a dinner than a party but there were some fine-looking ladies.

 

[The Large One]

I DJed our Christmas do which meant that (a) I got to choose the music (woo-hoo!) and (b) I didn't have to make small-talk with anyone. Oh, and there was free beer.

What it did also mean was that I could watch people descend into varying grades of meltdown, inappropriateness and emotional instability.

The worst thing is waking up the next day thinking '... shit, did I behave myself? And if I didn't, did I get away with it?'

 

[daveinprague]

Our department xmas dinner was at a 'posh' restaurant. Sat down at 18:00...1st course.. 19:30....main course 21:30...both cold... it was shit...and they got the hump as they didnt get tipped.

 

[Springal]

Ours is tomorrow! Won't be too bad I think, as the timing means most people will be going straight from work...

We had a supplier one last night, and one of the girls woke up to find a handful of sausages in her bag, and a sausage in her spare shoes? Also someone from HR got a text message from someones unlocked phone, regarding 'punishment' and how 'bad' they had been this year - luckily taken in good spirit !

Oh and one of the girls, slept with a man twice her age.

 

[crabface]

I once went to a work christmas party which ended up with two of the directors having a fight, which ended up leading to the company folding.

 

[Racek]

Ours is tomorrow! Won't be too bad I think, as the timing means most people will be going straight from work...

We had a supplier one last night, and one of the girls woke up to find a handful of sausages in her bag, and a sausage in her spare shoes? Also someone from HR got a text message from someones unlocked phone, regarding 'punishment' and how 'bad' they had been this year - luckily taken in good spirit !

Oh and one of the girls, slept with a man twice her age.

Thats the sort of thing I like to hear.

 

[Sheebo]

I DJed our Christmas do which meant that (a) I got to choose the music (woo-hoo!) and (b) I didn't have to make small-talk with anyone. Oh, and there was free beer.

What it did also mean was that I could watch people descend into varying grades of meltdown, inappropriateness and emotional instability.

The worst thing is waking up the next day thinking '... shit, did I behave myself? And if I didn't, did I get away with it?'

Did you wear a cap backwards? I have this image of you spinning ur shit on the decks bruv...

 

[The Large One]

Did you wear a cap backwards? I have this image of you spinning ur shit on the decks bruv...

Yo...*










* No.

 

[Randsta]

Our's is going to be awful couple of women in their 60's! no eye candy and mainly ******!

 

[Kumquat]

A friend of mine vomited in a girl's face while he was having sex with her. All he'd drunk was red wine and he said she looked like she'd had her throat cut. Unsurprisingly she was not very keen to continue their blossoming relationship after that.

 

[Meade's Ball]

I missed mine with sickness last Friday. But, i was texted the morning after by a friend saying: have you heard the news about DW (a manager in my department)? I reply with a no and await the news. Ten minutes pass and nothing has happened. I text again to say COME ON SPILL THE BEANS. My friend calls me insisting no text could accurately describe what had happened. Now, DW had been off sick for about 3 months. We'd asked of when he'd return but the general answer was "soon" from other managers. We began to gossip on occasion too over it. He'd grown ill at the same time as a female member of staff he was close to had basically left the building. The rumours were those of heartbreak or a breakdown caused by lost love. Now, he didn't make it to the Christmas do, which was held as every year at the Oval. But we always go to this same pub - one which last year i was pretty much escorted from for accusations of drug-dealing, which were not true - just around the corner from there at about 3pm. Boozers were heavily in action. It had gone dark, my friend told me, when this woman walked in and was seen around and about the place chatting to various other partygoers. My friend said about an hour passed until he realised that that woman was no woman at all but in fact DW! Everyone was shaking his hand to commend his act of bravery for revealing his transvestisism to such a large group of people at once. DW is a man in his 40s and not a pretty picture and i doubt he's much better in tights. Still, if this stops him being such a miserable **** then great.
Now, it didn't end there. Our communications department contains 4 women, 2 gay men and 1 bi. The most outrageous of the bunch is JJ, who often tells me he travels to Kings Cross for one-night stands with people he's met online; rutting nights away from his longterm partner, basically. Now, i was told that JJ, who doesn't seem to have ounce of shame about him, on the dancefloor made a play for the now-more-ladylike DW and pretty much starts to dry hump him face down on the floorwhilst everyone else is still drinking and staring on in shock. Fair play to both of them, i suppose. If you're worried about being seen dressed in your more comfortable and "alternative" state, then it's best to be publicly buggered and have the cut of your hem or bra-size barely even remembered any more.

I was gutted not to be there. I still am, in fact. That sounded like a classic. Have been working out my completely non-judgemental blasé greetings for DW when he goes back to work either as the man he was, a lookalike of Sylvester McCoy, or as something out of Prisoner Cell Block H. A simple welcome back will do, i guess.

 

[pishhead]

1 Woke up at a friends house with two Christmas trees, decorations and hastily unplugged lights intact. No idea as to how they got there.
2 Had a company do in Drury Lane, blacked out at some point and came around at 5am wandering down Charing Cross road.
3 I don't go to works Christmas parties anymore.

 

[crodonilson]

Ours is on 8th January

 

[Durlston]

A friend of mine vomited in a girl's face while he was having sex with her. All he'd drunk was red wine and he said she looked like she'd had her throat cut. Unsurprisingly she was not very keen to continue their blossoming relationship after that.

Ashley Cole?