The GENIUS of Cheryl Cole

[Rookie]

but she is the nations sweetheart. (c) any tabloid

 

[Simster]

With her forthcoming album "Messy Little Raindrops" due to hit the shops on November 1st, here's a sneak preview of some of the lyrics from 'Happy Tears' - which gives a heartbreaking insight into the breakup of her marriage to philandering soccerist blingmeister Ashley...

I cried when I heard you were cheatin'

I cried when I said I was leavin'

I cut off my hair and painted my toes

I sold all the diamonds and burnt all your clothes

I cried when I slashed all your tyres

I cried when your suit hit the fire...

Powerful stuff.
And get THIS, from the official X-Factor magazine:



We're SO fortunate to live in this golden ago of pop. Enjoy it while it lasts.

She seems to do an awful lot of crying.

Perhaps that's what impressed her when that scrawny mini-me of hers and that perma-punchable, stage-schooly "Katie" couldn't be arsed to perform at an audition and turned on the water works instead.

Any SANE person: f*** off you pair of drips. Try again next year.
Cheryl Cole: Aw bless, you two can go through, at the expense of people who did as they were f***ing TOLD and auditioned properly.

 

[Pavilionaire]

I like the lines in Verse 2:

"I cried as I left home to stay with my mum

That day I found you with your phone up your bum

Frolicking naked in the arms of John Terry

As your sphincter texted "Love" to his O2 Blackberry"

 

[Kinky Gerbil]

I like the lines in Verse 2:

"I cried as I left home to stay with my mum

That day I found you with your phone up your bum

Frolicking naked in the arms of John Terry

As your sphincter texted "Love" to his O2 Blackberry"

Ha ha genius

 

[Easy 10]

I like the lines in Verse 2:

"I cried as I left home to stay with my mum

That day I found you with your phone up your bum

Frolicking naked in the arms of John Terry

As your sphincter texted "Love" to his O2 Blackberry"

QUALITY

 

[Pavilionaire]

These are the lines a nation wants to hear!

A bit of George Michael "Outside"-style honesty wouldn't go amiss.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

"I cried as I picked up the papers that day
To read once again that my husband was gay
Then I found a yank dancer to act as my rock
When you texted some slut, with a pic of your cock"

 

[Acker79]

Obladee, obladah, life goes on, lah, lalalala life goes on
my boy lollypop, you make my heart go giddy up
last night I heard my mumma singing a song, ooh-ee, chirpy chirpy cheep cheep

"They don't make 'em like that anymore"

Apparently they do.

 

[Easy 10]

I cried when that cleaner gan took us to court

Just cos I smashed her and knocked off her wart

I divvent gone hurt her, I'm only a titch

But she had it coming, that stupid black bitch

 

[Herr Tubthumper]

...as Cheryl sadly croons, "You can't hold onto water"



Rubbish. Has this women never heard of a BUCKET?





Edit: damn you Granny...!

at the very least you could cup your hands.

 

[Pavilionaire]

She's bouncing back in Verse 3:

"I hope you're ashamed of all the bad things you did
Now do us a favour and f*** off to Madrid
Cos it's me on the telly and the front cover of Vogue
And I'll shit on the head of that Dannii Minogue."

 

[Northstander]

She's bouncing back in Verse 3:

"I hope you're ashamed of all the bad things you did
Now do us a favour and f*** off to Madrid
Cos it's me on the telly and the front cover of Vogue
And I'll shit on the head of that Dannii Minogue."

Funny but sadly, nail on head!

 

[marcos3263]

after reading this I feel close to tears, the poor poor girl.

I am so proud of her - In my eyes she is a true hero - not like those so called soldiers etc.

to go through what she has gone through - dont forget she had a disease and ALMOST DIED - and open her heart and write about it.

takes guts,

and she did it all on her own, with no support at all.


surely..................an angel

 

[arfer guinness]

Funny how the most famous singer in Girls Aloud is like the most famous one in The Spice Girls, not a lot of talent but married a well known footballer.

 

[Barrel of Fun]

He made me ditch my name from the pretty Miss Tweedy;
Turns out he was always rather weedy.
I changed my image to Tomb Raider Lara;
All that was left to say was Ash, sionara
Flew to LA leaving him the flak;
Shoulda listened to my momma and never gone black.

 

[The Ringleader Returns!]

"The thought of that night still makes me cry

You had pulled your calf, couldn't play in that big cup tie

It was the night I caught you in bed with Jermain Jenas

A grin on his face, Your lips round his penis."

 

[The Antikythera Mechanism]

I cried 'cause it was all such a farce

I cried 'bout the phone up your arse

 

[keaton]

She truely is a modern day Princess Di.

Let's hope so

 

[Easy 10]

Dark.

 

[Stoo82]

Im just looking forward to her big fall from grace.

It happens to them all.