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Palace BANNED from signing players



El Presidente

The ONLY Gay in Brighton
Helpful Moderator
Jul 5, 2003
39,922
Pattknull med Haksprut
Crystal Palace have been banned from signing players following a dispute over unpaid bonuses and signing-on fees from last season.

Crystal Palace dayglo orange twat of a chairman Simon Jordan insists all players - past and present - will get their money

Palace have been hit with the embargo from the Football League, which comes as a huge embarrassment for tractor driving referee haranguing Neil Warnock’s team as they prepare for the launch of the new Championship season.

Warnock’s side are due to complete their pre-season programme tonight against non-League Whyteleafe and start their League campaign on Saturday against Plymouth at Smellhurst Park.

Jordan said: ‘This summer has been difficult for Palace and therefore for me. We had a poor season and attendances were down. I have stepped in to bankroll the club to the tune of £5million between May 20 and July 31, money I had set aside for purchases of Nivea self tanning lotion.

‘I don’t have a board of investors pumping money in. Most clubs would have gone into administration but ours hasn’t because I stood up and made payments to hold the squad together" said the self promoting former barrow boy phone seller.

‘Most Palace fans will find it perplexing having finished a fantastic 15th with the manager me, myself, I appointed, but there are bonuses due and severance payments outstanding to ex-players. This doesn’t apply to the existing squad. Everyone at the club has been paid, just not the total they are owed.’

John Oster, James Scowcroft, Paul Ifill and Shefki Kuqi are among those understood to be owed money.

Jordan claimed the embargo was not a direct result of the missing payments but simply that everyone in football thinks he is a motormouthed arsehole and that it would have no impact his transfer policy with Darren Ambrose, Stern John and Freddie Sears added to the squad.
 




Danny-Boy

Banned
Apr 21, 2009
5,579
The Coast
Crystal Palace have been banned from signing players following a dispute over unpaid bonuses and signing-on fees from last season.

Crystal Palace dayglo orange twat of a chairman Simon Jordan insists all players - past and present - will get their money

Palace have been hit with the embargo from the Football League, which comes as a huge embarrassment for tractor driving referee haranguing Neil Warnock’s team as they prepare for the launch of the new Championship season.

Warnock’s side are due to complete their pre-season programme tonight against non-League Whyteleafe and start their League campaign on Saturday against Plymouth at Smellhurst Park.


Jordan said: ‘This summer has been difficult for Palace and therefore for me. We had a poor season and attendances were down. I have stepped in to bankroll the club to the tune of £5million between May 20 and July 31, money I had set aside for purchases of Nivea self tanning lotion.

‘I don’t have a board of investors pumping money in. Most clubs would have gone into administration but ours hasn’t because I stood up and made payments to hold the squad together" said the self promoting former barrow boy phone seller.

‘Most Palace fans will find it perplexing having finished a fantastic 15th with the manager me, myself, I appointed, but there are bonuses due and severance payments outstanding to ex-players. This doesn’t apply to the existing squad. Everyone at the club has been paid, just not the total they are owed.’

John Oster, James Scowcroft, Paul Ifill and Shefki Kuqi are among those understood to be owed money.

Jordan claimed the embargo was not a direct result of the missing payments but simply that everyone in football thinks he is a motormouthed arsehole and that it would have no impact his transfer policy with Darren Ambrose, Stern John and Freddie Sears added to the squad.

This reads to me like that stupid BBC show they put on on Tuesday nights "The New Romantics". Supposed to be factual but its actually twactual, just an excuse for a load of young hactors to talk modern whilst dressed in Victorian garb.
 


Danny-Boy

Banned
Apr 21, 2009
5,579
The Coast
This reads to me like that stupid BBC show they put on on Tuesday nights "The New Romantics". Supposed to be factual but its actually twactual, just an excuse for a load of young hactors to talk modern whilst dressed in Victorian garb.

Palace in transfer embargo - Crystal Palace FC Supporters' Website - The Holmesdale Online

My abject apologies, it is twue...and look at that photo, he looks like the "Scouser" in the Harry Enfield sketch, that walked into a gay bikers' club in London on a day out....:lol:
 


El Presidente

The ONLY Gay in Brighton
Helpful Moderator
Jul 5, 2003
39,922
Pattknull med Haksprut
Palace in transfer embargo - Crystal Palace FC Supporters' Website - The Holmesdale Online

My abject apologies, it is twue...and look at that photo, he looks like the "Scouser" in the Harry Enfield sketch, that walked into a gay bikers' club in London on a day out....:lol:

No problem Danny, as much as we like to laugh at SJ many on here do have a sneaking respect for him because

(1) He has put his money where his (very large) mouth is, we of course want Palace to lose every game, but don't want them to go into administration.
(2) He is a 'proper' fan of sorts
(3) His views on agents etc tend to strike a chord with many fans
(4) He has no idea just how silly he looks
 


lizard

Well-hung member
Jul 14, 2005
3,369
I think they should start on -50 points for a combination of this and being SCUM!
 




Danny-Boy

Banned
Apr 21, 2009
5,579
The Coast
No problem Danny, as much as we like to laugh at SJ many on here do have a sneaking respect for him because

(1) He has put his money where his (very large) mouth is, we of course want Palace to lose every game, but don't want them to go into administration.
(2) He is a 'proper' fan of sorts
(3) His views on agents etc tend to strike a chord with many fans
(4) He has no idea just how silly he looks

I used to feel like that, I can remember what went before (administration) BUT they guy is lile a seriously camp version of Simon Cowell, without the astuteness.

Plus anyone who made money out of mobile phones is to me an utter twat anyway, they are destroying civilisation, though I admit I have got one now...:down:
 


Tony Meolas Loan Spell

Slut Faced Whores
Jul 15, 2004
18,069
Vamanos Pest
Ha ha good job they signed Stern John before the embargo :jester:
 






Tony Meolas Loan Spell

Slut Faced Whores
Jul 15, 2004
18,069
Vamanos Pest
I think you will find that Palace were given a choice of a ten point deduction or signing Stern John, and they took the second option, which I suspect they may regret.

Speaking to a Palace fan at work he said that he knows that he will have a BRILLIANT first game, probably scoring three Hugo Sanchez style goals.....then be utter SHIT for the rest of the season!
 










Jan 30, 2008
31,981
Crystal Palace have been banned from signing players following a dispute over unpaid bonuses and signing-on fees from last season.

Crystal Palace dayglo orange twat of a chairman Simon Jordan insists all players - past and present - will get their money

Palace have been hit with the embargo from the Football League, which comes as a huge embarrassment for tractor driving referee haranguing Neil Warnock’s team as they prepare for the launch of the new Championship season.

Warnock’s side are due to complete their pre-season programme tonight against non-League Whyteleafe and start their League campaign on Saturday against Plymouth at Smellhurst Park.:

Jordan said: ‘This summer has been difficult for Palace and therefore for me. We had a poor season and attendances were down. I have stepped in to bankroll the club to the tune of £5million between May 20 and July 31, money I had set aside for purchases of Nivea self tanning lotion.

‘I don’t have a board of investors pumping money in. Most clubs would have gone into administration but ours hasn’t because I stood up and made payments to hold the squad together" said the self promoting former barrow boy phone seller.

‘Most Palace fans will find it perplexing having finished a fantastic 15th with the manager me, myself, I appointed, but there are bonuses due and severance payments outstanding to ex-players. This doesn’t apply to the existing squad. Everyone at the club has been paid, just not the total they are owed.’

John Oster, James Scowcroft, Paul Ifill and Shefki Kuqi are among those understood to be owed money.

Jordan claimed the embargo was not a direct result of the missing payments but simply that everyone in football thinks he is a motormouthed arsehole and that it would have no impact his transfer policy with Darren Ambrose, Stern John and Freddie Sears added to the squad.

:braders:
 






Sweeney Todd

New member
Apr 24, 2008
1,636
Oxford/Lancing
Palace fans have little to say on this thread. They had plenty to say on NSC when we were in the shite.
 










little al

Crystal Palace fan
Apr 4, 2009
3,628
Aberdeen, United Kingdom
The club is up for sale. He insists that he will only sell to someone with Palaces' interests at heart. In the meantime he is (reluctantly it has to be said) bailing us out.
 




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