NSC Confessional

[On the Left Wing]

Okay ... now gargling on a bar of soap

 

[Easy 10]

Went shooting wood pigeons with an airgun, to look hard. But I shot a dove by mistake. First and only time I have ever killed a living creature deliberately.

I am not altogether clear on this confession, my child.

You shot a dove by mistake, and yet you confess that this is the first and only occasion you have killed one of Gods creatures deliberately.

I say unto thee, thou dost cannot have it both ways. Forgiveness and redemption in truth can only be achieved if you are true unto yourself. Do not attempt to pull the wool over The Lords eyes, or he shalt smite thee in thine sleep, and take away your sweets.

 

[Digweeds Trousers]

Easy, I am not sure if you are particuluarly adroit on your Olde English Grammar but the words:

thou dost cannot have it both ways

is absolute nonsense, its sort of a double negative with grammatical suicide.

Gobledegook and gibberish. You are an intelligent man. Sort it.

 

[Easy 10]

Easy, I am not sure if you are particuluarly adroit on your Olde English Grammar but the words:

thou dost cannot have it both ways

is absolute nonsense, its sort of a double negative with grammatical suicide.

Gobledegook and gibberish. You are an intelligent man. Sort it.

Diggers, you should know by now that I just talk absolute bollocks. I've also had two wife-beaters at lunchtime and am now firmly entrenched in "Friday Afternoon" mode, hence my postings will once again be of a particularly poor quality, and barely worth the monitor space they appear on.

 

[Hungry Joe.]

You get me wrong, Phaedrus.... I think NSP is fantastic - it manages to help keep the noise level on NSC at a tolerable level!!

Ah, I see what you're getting at there, NSP acting as a sort of NSC creche? To be honest it's not always that adult on here.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

This was the first of many many lies i told people. Others include:

i had a badge-making machine.

Can't believe you DID that

STRAIGHT to hell - do not pass purgatory

 

[Meade's Ball]

Can't believe you DID that

STRAIGHT to hell - do not pass purgatory

You'd love to come round my house and make a few badges.
No swearwords though.

 

[Tom Bombadil]

When I was about eight I stole a marker pen from the newsagents near my school.

I felt so bad about it I put it back 2 days later.

 

[Dick Knights Mumm]

I have been having thoughts. Frequently.

 

[NMH]

I am seeing a girl called Carla and a girl called Clara and its getting kinda tricky. Especially when drunk and trying to send text messages...

Perfect, you can blame typos and dyslexia for any indiscretions.

What's the problem?

 

[Lady Bracknell]

Playing with my next door neighbours airgun when I was about 12, I shot a bird (a feathered one). I meant to just look tough, but to miss the bird, but I missed missing and shot it dead. 27 years later, I still feel guilty.

When I was about 12 I also played with an airgun. And neatly shot several holes through the next door neighbour's Sunday newspaper.

Unfortunately, he was sat in a deck chair in his back garden reading it at the time.

Did I take the blame?

Er, no.

I confess that I told my mother it was Nicky Brown from up the road wot dunnit. And his mother fetched him a terrible clump around the ears and sent him for an early bed without any tea.

 

[Braders]

i've got too many sins but not enough time to write them all down

 

[Brighton TID]

At the Amex, I once called one of the opposition players who was faking injury a C U NEXT TUESDAY at the very top of my voice. Embarrassing and completely out of character and should have been thrown out.