Michael Owen - death by powerpoint

[portlock seagull]

MICHAEL OWEN BROCHURE: The complete 32-page agents' dossier on the fallen Newcastle star and former England striker | Mail Online


Do you think Craig Davies has one of these too?

 

[strings]

Bloody 'eck - I didn't realise he was only 29!

If he can get fit, he really would be a decent signing for someone - a very convincing book actually!

 

[folkestonesgull]

He is still the most natural (english) finisher playing today - He is a big tournament player, and would be a great signing on a 2 year contract for any team.

 

[Easy 10]

If a player of Michael Owens profile needs a glossy magazine all about him to hawk around prospective suitors, then he really is more washed up than I thought. I would think he finds this quite humilating.

 

[Tony Meolas Loan Spell]

I would still have him in the England squad...worth throwing on at nil nil with a few mins to go...

 

[Herr Tubthumper]

He is still the most natural (english) finisher playing today - He is a big tournament player, and would be a great signing on a 2 year contract for any team.

...wasnt for Newcastle was he?

He's washed up, face it. He might be the most natural english finisher or whatever but in the land of the blind etc.

 

[countrygull]

`Michael may consider a challenge away from St James`s Park`. Try `Michael can't get away from this God forsaken place fast enough`

 

[Muzzman]

It all sounds good until you get to his medical review... which spans 3 pages.

 

[strings]

It claims that Owen was very close to signing a lifetime deal with Newcastle, which was scuppered by the departure of Keegan.

 

[pasty]

`Michael may consider a challenge away from St James`s Park`.

I can't be arsed to trawl through 32 pages, but does it really say that? Surely that is the single most useless piece of information ever to be put in a document of any kind. If he wouldn't consider away from St James' Park, then whats the point of the f***ing brochure?

 

[Brighton Breezy]

I wouldn't have thought pointing out he played in a large number of Newcastle games over the last two years was a good selling point...

 

[beorhthelm]

If a player of Michael Owens profile needs a glossy magazine all about him to hawk around prospective suitors, then he really is more washed up than I thought. I would think he finds this quite humilating.

apparently (and not really unsurprising in these days of agents) it is quite normal for players to have such brochures even for those under contracts.

still all one need know about Owen is a goal every 2 games, even with his Newcastle time taken into account. just need to get and stay fit and have a string of games. will turn up at West Ham (probably on alot less than supposedly at Newcastle)

 

[Marshy]

Fit and scoring goals i would still pick him with Rooney as Englands front 2.
Nobody else is even close

 

[Easy 10]

apparently (and not really unsurprising in these days of agents) it is quite normal for players to have such brochures even for those under contracts.

still all one need know about Owen is a goal every 2 games, even with his Newcastle time taken into account. just need to get and stay fit and have a string of games. will turn up at West Ham (probably on alot less than supposedly at Newcastle)

I could perhaps understand it for a younger, more up-and-coming player who is trying to make a name for himself and earn a big-money transfer to a top-flight club. But Owen has been around for 12-13 years now, what can a new brochure possibly say about him that isn't already common knowledge to everyone ?

Just smacks of desperation. Which, lets face it, is exactly what it is.

 

[Pavilionaire]

The bottom line is that it comes down to wages, and his wages are far too high.

That said, there will be takers. Harry Redknapp must be looking at this seriously, because with a bit of wheeler-dealing he could offload, Pavlyuchenko, Bent and Zokora and have money for Owen and Crouch.

 

[Easy 10]

Anyone who takes him on but doesn't build an element of "pay-as-you-play" into his contract is a MUG.

 

[Pavilionaire]

I'd love to know the maths behind this, like how many shirts you will shift in the Far East in his first season.

Spurs have missed out on Europe so their profile will dip, yet having c. 15 matches less to play than Arsenal, Villa and Everton could see them have a serious assault on the 5th spot. This move could work for Owen as most weeks it will only be one match per week, and it could work for Spurs because they need a big-name signing with global appeal.

 

[Lush]

I'd love to know the maths behind this, like how many shirts you will shift in the Far East in his first season.

Spurs have missed out on Europe so their profile will dip, yet having c. 15 matches less to play than Arsenal, Villa and Everton could see them have a serious assault on the 5th spot. This move could work for Owen as most weeks it will only be one match per week, and it could work for Spurs because they need a big-name signing with global appeal.

Does Michael Owen still have global appeal though? Surely the kids have moved on by now, even the kids in the Farthest East.

We only have fond memories because of the Germany 1- England 5 - and that was 8 years ago...

 

[PILTDOWN MAN]

Its nice to know he's "clean and fresh" he's not a washed lettuce for f*** sake

 

[Easy 10]

Its nice to know he's "clean and fresh" he's not a washed lettuce for f*** sake

He is a bit sluggish now though.