Irritating phrases or words in the workplace.

[Parson Henry]

We have probably had this before so apologies if so.

Just been to a meeting at work and a number of those damn awful irritating words or phrases surfaced but a few were new to me.

'these are now glory days and we must be ready to turn and face the crowd'

We also had 'shambolic shake up' and 'keep the gravy flowing'!!!!!!

What is that all about?

What are your favourite irritating words or phrases?

 

[Hampden Park]

go with the flow

you are good at what you do (normally said after a bollocking)

it is not set in concrete

 

[Yorkie]

At the end of the day.

Once during an appraisal at Yorkshire Electricity my supervisor kept saying 'at the end of the day' so I just said, 'At the end of the day I go home.'
Fortunately he had a sense of humour and laughed.

 

[Gazwag]

"Due to inflation continuing at a low rate and the increased capital costs due to computer upgrading etc etc"

 

[Parson Henry]

Just had a memo to all staff from the chief bozo...

'We must ensure that this message is ingrained into the DNA of all staff'

Classic!!

 

[Normal Rob]

the evilest thing i ever heard was when being questioned about redundancies a director replied...

'it's not downsizing, it's rightsizing'

c**t.

 

[Stinky Kat]

we need to stop working in chimneys

its a win win situation

this piece of work is a developmental opportunity for you

AGGGGGGGHHHHHHH. I want to kill my mamnagers

 

[Silent Bob]

"stop slacking and do some work"

irritates the hell out of me.

 

[Yorkie]

I hate mission statements.

 

[Stinky Kat]

I hate mission statements.

who reads them, not the customers

 

[Franks Wild Years]

I'm working at a corporate conference today. Here's some titles of presentations.

Measurement Strategies and Decoherence Effects in a Superconducting Quantum Device.

Natural three-qubit ineractions in one-way quantum computing.

Loss tolerant characterization of non classical photon statistics.

If i could understand what the f*** they were on about I think I would find them very irritating.

 

[Stinky Kat]

I'm working at a corporate conference today. Here's some titles of presentations.

Measurement Strategies and Decoherence Effects in a Superconducting Quantum Device.

Natural three-qubit ineractions in one-way quantum computing.

Loss tolerant characterization of non classical photon statistics.

If i could understand what the f*** they were on about I think I would find them very irritating.

Is the conference being facilitated by Emperors New Clothes ltd?

 

[Franks Wild Years]

Is the conference being facilitated by Emperors New Clothes ltd?

I wish I could post some of the diagrams they are using. They're very pretty.

I'm in the strange twilight world of NSC and coorporate egghead bollocks.

 

[Bluejuice]

"Stop downloading porn on company machines"

Seriously, when is there ever a call for that kind of language?

Just have to ignore 'em

 

[Marshy]

anybody that sais " Do you know what i mean ? "

 

[The Clown of Pevensey Bay]

People who "buy into" ideas

People who suggest I "park that there for the time being" (when they mean "stop talking about that and talk about this, please")

Anything to do with synergies

 

[clapham_gull]

We used the get a Christmas bonus.

They stopped it for a year, then after complaints from staff re-introduced it for one year only.

So we got the message it was re-branded the "millenium bonus"

 

[clapham_gull]

"solution provider"

 

[clapham_gull]

"that's not my gig"

 

[Tom Bombadil]

I have been asked "to facilitate the development of interdepartmental synergies"