I'm going scumbag hunting...

[Cian]

Me and a friend have just (well, it was two hours ago now) been beaten up. I came out far the better from it - Petes in hospital, I'm not. All over not giving some scumbags a smoke - they didn't take phones/cash/laptops/anything off us.

I know who did it, I know where he lives, and I know the cops want something to put him away for - he's on a suspended sentance for two minor stabbings.

I've gone to the cops, have to go in on Monday to press charges. Should I go the full way and do him for assault, or should I pay him a visit - from experience he's a weak bugger when sober and not surrounded by his mates, and I'm not a small person....

He's a Ugandan who's here illegally and is currently undergoing deportation proceedings, just to make it more complex...

 

[Vankleek Hill Seagull]

As you've been to the police, a personal visit might be dimly viewed.

Go all the way and press charges. If he's there illegally and needs to beat up people then hopefully they'll deport him a bit quicker.

 

[Shizuoka Dolphin]

On the other hand, if he's going to be deported anyway, after you've been to the bill, go round to give him a proper send off.

 

[Garry Nelson's Left Foot]

Or do both.
Go to the police and press charges.
Then get an 'acquantaince' to 'have a chat.'

 

[NMH]

Make up a great story about ongoing threats to put something explosive in your car, or your house.

Terrorism is punished more severely and thoroughly nowadays, be it local or international.

From now on though, carry mace or pepper spray, or if you really think you may be at further risk, send me a pm and I'll remind you of a certain common household chemical that stops everything that breathes.

 

[B.M.F]

Or do both.
Go to the police and press charges.
Then get an 'acquantaince' to 'have a chat.'

You know this makes sense. I do not condoe violence normally but little shits like this deserve to be put in there place.

 

[tedebear]

sounds like he's getting whats coming anyhow - just press charges, add a few words about how illegal immigrants are ruining things for the rest of the immigrants who are here rightfully (me!!) and ensure he's deported, usually takes about 10days after he's given a deportation issue - enough time for him to be visited by a friend of a friend's friend - if you get my drift...

 

[Everest]

As he's here illegally, surely it can't be illegal to kick the sh1t out of him.

 

[Cian]

I've calmed down a bit, gone to the cops again, found out that he has an exclusion order meaning he can't come within 1 mile of my towns boundaries (which are HUGE, covering probably 20 square miles or more).

So we're going in on Monday to make statements and get the fecker deported again.

 

[Rangdo]

Don't know if this is true but a bouncer mate of mine said if you hold a Thompson directory against someone's body when you hit them ie. with a baton then it doesn't leave any bruising and therefore no evidence.

 

[Wardy]

Don't know if this is true but a bouncer mate of mine said if you hold a Thompson directory against someone's body when you hit them ie. with a baton then it doesn't leave any bruising and therefore no evidence.

Would depend if you then hit them where the Thompson was or aroung the head.

 

[Rangdo]

Would depend if you then hit them where the Thompson was or aroung the head.

Well yes...

 

[Everest]

Does that only apply to a Thompson, or will a Beano do?

 

[Cian]

We don't have Thomson directories - will the Yellow Pages work?

 

[Rangdo]

I think it's in the thickness. A Yellow pages would be too thick so you'd need something like a baseball bat for him to feel it, which would probably be quite satisfying for you. A Beano on the other hand would be too thin.
He was told this by a policeman when he was a bouncer at the Glastonbury Festival.

 

[Everest]

Cleared that up then.

 

[Rangdo]

Do you get the Beano then?

 

[Cian]

The Dublin Independent Directory is about the same width as a Thompson Directory, I think. A bit thinner than the phonebook and much thinner than the yellow pages....

 

[Rangdo]

So you could hit him with a baton through the Dublin Independant Directory while a mate beats him round the head with a Yellow Pages and pokes him in the eye with a rolled up Beano.

 

[Kev the Ape]

the bastards. I hope he gets locked away.