If you fancy a bird...

[Da Man Clay]

Because that what this thread is about isn't it?

No. This threads about staking, dirty little secret is about keeping an affair secret.

 

[Les Biehn]

Well I think the stalking option is a good idea...

Thing is once you know where she lives what then??

Watch her and take notes. Generally revell in the sense of power you scopophilic past time has given you over her. Then go home and masturbate over tiny details of her life that you have put much meaning into while being aware that it is unhealthy.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

Just let her know your stalk is perfectly harmless Leslie

 

[Les Biehn]

I will sit ouside her house listening to Behold by Joey Fehrenbach fantasising what it would be like to kiss her and make her tea and toast. Then when she goes to bed I will go home and cry myself to sleep as if I am in a mid 80s John Cusack teen movie, romantic and profound rather than sad and desperate.

 

[Kinky Gerbil]

I think it depends if you plan to rape her.

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

But I feel like I need some sort of neurotic perversion and theres this bird I fancy at work and I want to sniff her or something so the whole voyeurism thing could be worth a go.

Bloody Hell Les you will be like that bloke in Silence of the Lambs in the basement cell next to Hannibal Lecter who sees Jodie Foster walk past and then bangs on out and sprays her with the results as she leaves

 

[Les Biehn]

Bloody Hell Les you will be like that bloke in Silence of the Lambs in the basement cell next to Hannibal Lecter who sees Jodie Foster walk past and then bangs on out and sprays her with the results as she leaves

Its called spidermanning.

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

I will sit ouside her house listening to Behold by Joey Fehrenbach fantasising what it would be like to kiss her and make her tea and toast. Then when she goes to bed I will go home and cry myself to sleep as if I am in a mid 80s John Cusack teen movie, romantic and profound rather than sad and desperate.

your starting to worry me

 

[Les Biehn]

your starting to worry me

Yes, thats right Spielberg I now know you love tea and toast. You know I watch, don't be all coy.

 

[Meade's Ball]

If i were a woman dressed up as a young boy pretending to be a girl 3 years his senior, then i would adore your following. Without you sniffing my stubbly clump and the leathery whip that roofs it and that i need to wear in my school showers on a Thursday afternoon, i wouldn't know how to get through the day, or bathe in it's importance. I would begin following you after a while. Especially if you began dressing as an old man impersonating my mum, who died in the 70s with alzheimers.

 

[Les Biehn]

If i were a woman dressed up as a young boy pretending to be a girl 3 years his senior, then i would adore your following. Without you sniffing my stubbly clump and the leathery whip that roofs it and that i need to wear in my school showers on a Thursday afternoon, i wouldn't know how to get through the day, or bathe in it's importance. I would begin following you after a while. Especially if you began dressing as an old man impersonating my mum, who died in the 70s with alzheimers.

We can do that Meado. Can I call you Jennifer during the stalk?

 

[Meade's Ball]

We can do that Meado. Can I call you Jennifer during the stalk?

Jennifer dates a man
From a 60s covers band.


Ok. My mum was called Ford Von Smorgasbord during the darker, more caring hours. The man i thought you might become to impersonate her well was Harold I. Aint.