I got stopped by the police today...

[Bry Nylon]

For a traffic violation, whilst driving an HGV for a friend.
Traffic cop called me "Sir" throughout, was exceptionally polite, but at the same time gave me a right bollocking and some good free advice

In the end, he let me off with a warning. Buckinghamshire Traffic Police

 

[clippedgull]

Did he know you are a member of our emergency services?

 

[HampshireSeagulls]

Did he know you are a member of our emergency services?

Course. The "friendly advice" was TAKE YOUR f***ing FIREMAN'S HELMET OFF WHEN YOU ARE DRIVING!"

 

[Bry Nylon]

No, I just sat in the back of his Volvo, watching the vascar video tape and occasionally saying "yes" and "no" and finally, "err, thank you Officer."

 

[Barrel of Fun]

Dodgy tail light, Bry?

 

[Bry Nylon]

Dodgy tail light, Bry?

No, I went through a red light. BIG mistake in an HGV and I am quite ashamed and very glad that nobody had to pay the price for my stupidity (I didnt mean to - it was simply one of those 'moments').

 

[Barrel of Fun]

No, I went through a red light. BIG mistake in an HGV and I am quite ashamed and very glad that nobody had to pay the price for my stupidity (I didnt mean to - it was simply one of those 'moments').

Having seen the aftermath of light jumping, I thought you would be very careful Bry!

Having said that, I have done it.

Should I brake? Will I make it? Etc.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

For a traffic violation, whilst driving an HGV for a friend.
Traffic cop called me "Sir" throughout, was exceptionally polite, but at the same time gave me a right bollocking and some good free advice

In the end, he let me off with a warning. Buckinghamshire Traffic Police

Did you explain you had an important volleyball match to attend?

 

[Bry Nylon]

Having seen the aftermath of light jumping, I thought you would be very careful Bry!

Having said that, I have done it.

Should I brake? Will I make it? Etc.

Well, I wasn't exactly light jumping. When I got to the lights, the car in front of me had broken down. When the lights changed to green, everybody behind me streamed past. When it was clear, I swung out, to get past the broken down car, blocking the entire road. Then the lights went to amber, but my cab was already over the line and in the junction. So I thought "f*** it" and just put my foot down to clear the road. But, yes, my trailer unit went through the lights on red.

Next thing I saw were blue flashing lights in my door mirror...

 

[Easy 10]

Good to see a bit of honesty and HUMILITY there Bry. Most of the time a tale like this would take the tone of "fookin' PIGS wasting their time, shouldn't they be beating up MUSLIMS or something ?".

Good work fella.

 

[Barrel of Fun]

I hate it when that happens. The British are generally fairly good at queuing, yet when it comes to something like that, people haven't got the slightest inclination to let the first car/truck go.

Another one is a bottle neck (Particularly the one by Arundel). A queue forms, yet people still pass 50 odd cars in the outside lane and then force their way in.

I imagine you would have been pulled aside by the police if you were blocking the junction anyway, so a lose-lose situtation!

 

[Rangdo]

I hate it when that happens. The British are generally fairly good at queuing, yet when it comes to something like that, people haven't got the slightest inclination to let the first car/truck go.

Another one is a bottle neck (Particularly the one by Arundel). A queue forms, yet people still pass 50 odd cars in the outside lane and then force their way in.

I imagine you would have been pulled aside by the police if you were blocking the junction anyway, so a lose-lose situtation!

A simple solution to that is those "merge in turn" signs. Make people use both lanes to queue and take turns. No more queue jumping. Unfortunately they're few and far between but they always seem to work.

 

[Beach Hut]

Typical public servants looking after each other

 

[clippedgull]

Typical public servants looking after each other

I thought that but he claimed he didn't expose himself to the copper

 

[Easy 10]

I'm a notorious queue-jumper at the regular LOGJAM along the A27 eastbound when joining the A23. The inside lane always gets snarled up with cars mixing with the traffic joining the A27 from the Devils Dyke roundabout. It gets pretty dangerous at the top, as sometimes it ends up almost stationary with LOADS of cars trying to join the left lane to trundle down the hill to the A23.

Sod that. I ALWAYS take the outside lane, fly past the congestion at the top of the hill, and join the sliproad for the A23 300-400 yards further on where the traffic is moving freely. Its idiotic playing dodgems at the top.

 

[Bry Nylon]

In case it benefits anyone else in the future, I was once given some really good advice by an ex-traffic police officer I used to work with, in the event you are pulled over:

1. Don't unclip your seat belt. They will naturally assume that you weren't wearing it.
2. NEVER get out of you vehicle until invited to do so by the police. If you do, it will be seen as confrontational, or that you are likely to do a runner.
3. Take the keys from the ignition and place them in a visible place on the dash. This relaxes traffic officers straight away.
4. Put your hands on the wheel where the officer can see them, and don't move them, or make any sudden movements. Remember, they have no idea who they have just pulled over.
5. Always apologise for the offence and don't try to argue the toss. Chances are they don't want the paperwork that comes with booking you for a minor offence, but if you act like an argumentative knob, they probably will.

 

[Barrel of Fun]

I'm a notorious queue-jumper at the regular LOGJAM along the A27 eastbound when joining the A23. The inside lane always gets snarled up with cars mixing with the traffic joining the A27 from the Devils Dyke roundabout. It gets pretty dangerous at the top, as sometimes it ends up almost stationary with LOADS of cars trying to join the left lane to trundle down the hill to the A23.

Sod that. I ALWAYS take the outside lane, fly past the congestion at the top of the hill, and join the sliproad for the A23 300-400 yards further on where the traffic is moving freely. Its idiotic playing dodgems at the top.

I will gesticulate next time you fly past me.

Aside from that, a perfect junction/inter-change for lots of traffic. Waterhall or Toad Hole are clearly perfect for out football stadium!

 

[Bry Nylon]

I thought that but he claimed he didn't expose himself to the copper

I didn't! I thought if I told him I was an off-duty firefighter, I'd get "well you should know better!" And be looking at 3 points and £100 fine before you could say "evenin' all.."

 

[Easy 10]

I will gesticulate next time you fly past me.

I doubt I'll notice. I'll probably be texting someone.

*rebel*

 

[Lord Bracknell]

A simple solution to that is those "merge in turn" signs. Make people use both lanes to queue and take turns. No more queue jumping. Unfortunately they're few and far between but they always seem to work.

They have that sign on the A27 Lewes bypass at the moment - eastbound on the approach to the single-line working that precedes the roadworks at the Southerham roundabout.

Delays in the evening peak have more or less been eliminated - at least for drivers who are sensible enough to use the outside lane to approach the point where the merging takes place.

Inexplicably, there are many, many drivers who are daft enough to join the long queue that builds up in the left hand lane. And some of them even get arsy with those of us who are simply obeying the "MERGE IN TURN" sign.