Girlfriend funds Archer - dilemma

[Cian]

Focus have never, ever come into Ireland, as yet. However, if they do nobody I know will shop there without getting a serious earful from me.

 

[The Clown of Pevensey Bay]

I would f*%k her something rotten on that table as that what the wanker did to us

I wouldn't bank on the table being sturdy enough! (Not calling your gf fat by the way)

 

[trueblue]

Sadly none of these comments have so far swayed my girlfriend from her adoration of the aforesaid table

 

[Bwian]

Sadly none of these comments have so far swayed my girlfriend from her adoration of the aforesaid table

Then it's up to you to put a f***ing big scratch in it and take it back as damaged.

(Bill Arsehole is a **** is not a good scratch by the way-they might catch on).

Regardless-the table has to go back and in a condition that prevents re-sale would be a bonus!

 

[¡Cereal Killer!]

offer her the best sex she ver had if she takes it back!

 

[Yorkie]

Definitely dump the table. Your girlfriend has no taste anyway as Ikea have a much better choice and quality.

 

[Set of Tracksuits]

Tell her that your previous girlfriend bought an identical set of table and chairs when you were together, that you regularly had passionate sex on/over it, and that you just can't look at it without thinking about her.

She will hate that.

Then, take it back for a refund and get a nice one from Ikea.

PS. Buy her a copy of More Than Ninety Minutes and make her read it until she admits the error of her ways.