Following on from the Butters thread

[Billy the Fish]

When was the last time you shat yourself?
A couple of years ago for me, when I was ill. Went to let rip when I was in bed but it turned out to be a squirter

 

[Hampden Park]

many moons ago onboard ship whilst having a shower. had to push the big bits down the plug hole with my toes

 

[Race]

Urrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!

 

[Les Biehn]

Can't remember it happens so often.

 

[Trigger]

Well, it was abo.... Oh f***, just off to change my pants.

 

[Uncle Buck]

Well, it was abo.... Oh f***, just off to change my pants.

The curry after the cricket?

 

[Faldo]

I often have ro 'revisit' or have a 'courtesy wipe' an hour or so after dropping the kids off at the pool. I dont think this constitutes pooing ones self, but is probably an unhappy middle ground.

 

[Brighton till i die]

i shit myself at school once during a science session. (only interesting thing of the whole of my schooling life! )

 

[Billy the Fish]

I often have ro 'revisit' or have a 'courtesy wipe' an hour or so after dropping the kids off at the pool. I dont think this constitutes pooing ones self, but is probably an unhappy middle ground.

I'm quite glad you said that 'cos I get that sometimes, I thought I might have something wrong with my bullet hole. I also rekon I might have the shitting form of touretts syndrome. Whenever I go to a pub that I know has dirty toilets, the need for a dump just pops up out of nowhere and I just have to go. It still happens even if I make a point of crapping before I go out.

 

[Caveman]

Billy your not alone.

 

[Napper]

not shit myself for years but Im forever running out of toilet paper so have to remove the shower head and use it as an elaborate BDAY.
Strangely satisfying

 

[Hampden Park]

not shit myself for years but Im forever running out of toilet paper so have to remove the shower head and use it as an elaborate BDAY.
Strangely satisfying

i hope you asked for permission first from the person having a shower

 

[Northstander]

In my drunken stupors, I often Leave my deposits when breakin wind, or when breaking wind I piss m'self at the same time!

Do I win a fiver?

*need to cut down on drunken nights out*

 

[Caveman]

Never soiled myself, however I once (after an all-dayer) went to bed and dreamt I was standing at the toilet....

Unfortunate wet bed, boxers and hall way followed.

 

[SJ's Love Monkey]

Cant remember actually cacking myself but i have had to suck up a stray turd when farting. Usually when you are with your mates in a pub and trying to show off in a farting competition by forcing the issue when its not quite ready!

 

[Caveman]

Usually when you are with your mates in a pub

You found some then


Not to sure if they'll be impressed with this little number.

 

[SJ's Love Monkey]

You found some then


Not to sure if they'll be impressed with this little number.

They are obviously imaginary thats why i always win Cavey!

 

[clippedgull]

Shat myself at school once. (primary not secondary!!)

I had to take my pants home wrapped (by the school secretary)in newspaper like a little parcel of fish and chips.

Mum thought I had won a prize in a raffle

 

[Billy the Fish]

Never soiled myself, however I once (after an all-dayer) went to bed and dreamt I was standing at the toilet....

Unfortunate wet bed, boxers and hall way followed.

We've all done that before, in fact you're not normal if you havent pissed the bed after the age of 18. My brother was the worst, he used to go in his sock draw all the time and has even been known to stand at the top of the stairs and make a river.
Alcohol is great kids.

 

[Les Biehn]

Also used my socks once to wipe my arris. Was in Alley Cats one New Years Eve off my tits and there was no bog roll. The particularly tricky part was turning them inside out to double the usage.