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Followed through....



crodonilson

He/Him
Jan 17, 2005
13,917
Lyme Regis
Someone in my office has just followed through and had to be sent home, I wouldn't like to be her when she comes back to work tomorrow or Monday.

:dunce:

Anyone else got any cringy things that have happened in their office??
 




Gritt23

New member
Jul 7, 2003
14,902
Meopham, Kent.
Could she not have just sneaked into the loos, and disposed of her undergarments for the rest of the day?
 












One of my colleagues used to work in a small office where one chap used to enjoy a good rocket polish at his desk every now and then. His work mates got sick of the sight of his todger, so to appease them he brought in a long wooley sock which he would place over the offending member. Unfortunately he never washed it, and kept it on his desk.
 






Ned

Real Northern Monkey
Jul 16, 2003
1,618
At Home
crodonilson said:
Someone in my office has just followed through and had to be sent home,

Had the same thing happen in the factory a couple of years ago.
this chap did his ring so badly he had to be sent home in one of those white paper overalls and his clothes in a bin bag
 








Tubby Mondays

Well-known member
Dec 8, 2005
3,101
A Crack House
One of my mates worked with a women who had a bit of a problem with the stingo (she couldnt get enough of it). One day she disappeared to the bogs and didnt come back for quite some time. Then she rang the office from her mobile and asked one of the females to go to the bogs to help her as she had had an 'accident'. One of the women went in there and reported back, whilst vomitting at the same time,that there was shite everywhere, bar in the toilet. Walls, systern, floor, sink, and the pisshead.

They both had to be sent home.
 


Man of Harveys

Well-known member
Jul 9, 2003
18,801
Brighton, UK
Lokki 7 said:
One of my colleagues used to work in a small office where one chap used to enjoy a good rocket polish at his desk every now and then. His work mates got sick of the sight of his todger, so to appease them he brought in a long wooley sock which he would place over the offending member. Unfortunately he never washed it, and kept it on his desk.
What the f*** is your work like?! Were any of the protagonists involved in the "feeding the junior trader dogfood" incident? :lolol: :nono:
 






Meade's Ball

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2003
13,647
Hither (sometimes Thither)
I haven't plopped myself in the office, but, around 6 weeks ago, i had a couple of pints after work and found myself a bit wobbly on the tube home. My stomach began to rumble, junglewise, and the sudoku i was working on sat less still than my eyes did, so i had to run from the train and hit the streets again. Something was on it's way no matter what i said or corked, so i just needed a venue to expound it. A quick walk for about 7 minutes then found me trousers and pants down in a closed shop doorway in Camden. Squirt, i went. I thought i was somewhere quiet, but within seconds a man was running for a bus straight past me.
I wiped my bum with the crossword i had partly failed at, and hoped no one would see the poo-paper, pick it up for a stare, and recognise my handwriting under the splatty acid the crumpled papyrus unhappily held.
Not a wise evening.
 


Simster

"the man's an arse"
Jul 7, 2003
54,763
Surrey
Meade's_Ball said:
I haven't plopped myself in the office, but, around 6 weeks ago, i had a couple of pints after work and found myself a bit wobbly on the tube home. My stomach began to rumble, junglewise, and the sudoku i was working on sat less still than my eyes did, so i had to run from the train and hit the streets again. Something was on it's way no matter what i said or corked, so i just needed a venue to expound it. A quick walk for about 7 minutes then found me trousers and pants down in a closed shop doorway in Camden. Squirt, i went. I thought i was somewhere quiet, but within seconds a man was running for a bus straight past me.
I wiped my bum with the crossword i had partly failed at, and hoped no one would see the poo-paper, pick it up for a stare, and recognise my handwriting under the splatty acid the crumpled papyrus unhappily held.
Not a wise evening.
*wipes tear from eye*
 


Mr Blobby

New member
Jul 14, 2003
2,632
In a cave
On our flight back from Kenya in January a rather large lady had a bit of an accident on the plane. The crew had to remove all her clothes (she was dressed in Kenyan traditional clothes, so once they had unwrapped the many layers they filled about 10 carrier bags). The toilet was out of use for the rest of the trip! The smell was not too good, then the same woman decided to collapse, tut, some people are just attention seekers ;) she even went on to pass out and they had to ask if a Doctor was on board :(

She was due to get on a flight to Toronto at Gatwick - as the Crew said "no chance"
 


Meade's Ball

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2003
13,647
Hither (sometimes Thither)
Simster said:
*wipes tear from eye*

I had to do something similar in the £12 cab i then got home.
I was so damn desperate and it was after 11.30, so i couldn't be sure i'd find a pub to unlimit my bowels in. I thought a park might be nearby or a small trip down the canal might be for the best. I had no time for sight-seeing, so a nearby doorway was the only answer. I also had the thought of showing any catcher the prescription i had in my back pocket, seemingly an excuse for any careless act i carried out.
I certainly don;t remember everything, but i know i had a hot bumcrack in the morning. Don't wipe your anus with an inky Independent, i would say.
 




TonyW

New member
Feb 11, 2004
2,525
scooter1 said:
I guess its not so easy to hide if you're wearing a g-string, and ideally a white skirt..

Right, that's made my decision on dessert this lunch time. Apple, I'll save the chocolate mouse for later:lolol:
 




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