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Craptastic Joke du Jour
- Thread starter Soul Finger
- Start date
pasty
A different kind of pasty
Q. What's pink and wrinkled and hangs out grandads pyjamas ?
A. Grandma
A. Grandma
While vacationing in the hills of Alabama, the big city man discovered that he had no writing paper at all for his personal correspondence. He went into the small town near-by and found only an old-fashioned country store. Behind the counter was a really nice looking young blonde gal, quite obviously a local farm girl.
He asked, "Do you keep stationery?"
"Well," she giggled, "I can... until the last few minutes, then I just go plain wild."
He asked, "Do you keep stationery?"
"Well," she giggled, "I can... until the last few minutes, then I just go plain wild."
Eddie the Seagull
New member
What do you call a woman who throws her telephone bill into the fire?
Bernadette.
Bernadette.
The Large One
Who's Next?
What's invisible and smells of bananas?
A monkey's fart.
(Don't blame me, that was the missus' gag from her bleedin' anklebiting schoolkids).
A monkey's fart.
(Don't blame me, that was the missus' gag from her bleedin' anklebiting schoolkids).
Wardy
NSC's Benefits Guru
What the proper name of a women?
Life support machine for a vignia.
Life support machine for a vignia.
Wardywonderland said:
Que ??
Lammy
Registered Abuser
To gangsters are talking in the pub. One of them is looking a bit down in the dumps.
Gangster1: "What's up there mate?"
Gangster2: "I just don't seem to be able to orgasm! I get right to the point of climax but I just can't go the last bit to push me over the edge! It's beginning to affect my marrage."
Gangster1: "Don't worry mate, this is more common than you think! Infact, I used to suffer from the same thing myself! What I found helped finish me off was to fire off my gun right at the point I'm about to cum. Works everytime for me and the wife loves it too!"
Gangster2: "thanks I'll give it a try"
The next day to two meet up in the pub again. This time the Gangster is looking white as a sheep and decidely unbalance.
Gangster1: "Jesus mate! What happened to YOU!"
Gangster2: "Terrible! I tried out your advice last night!"
Gangster1: "How did you get on?"
Gangster2: "Well I was getting close to orgasm so I fired my gun off. Then my wife shat in my face and bit my dick off!"
Gangster1: "What's up there mate?"
Gangster2: "I just don't seem to be able to orgasm! I get right to the point of climax but I just can't go the last bit to push me over the edge! It's beginning to affect my marrage."
Gangster1: "Don't worry mate, this is more common than you think! Infact, I used to suffer from the same thing myself! What I found helped finish me off was to fire off my gun right at the point I'm about to cum. Works everytime for me and the wife loves it too!"
Gangster2: "thanks I'll give it a try"
The next day to two meet up in the pub again. This time the Gangster is looking white as a sheep and decidely unbalance.
Gangster1: "Jesus mate! What happened to YOU!"
Gangster2: "Terrible! I tried out your advice last night!"
Gangster1: "How did you get on?"
Gangster2: "Well I was getting close to orgasm so I fired my gun off. Then my wife shat in my face and bit my dick off!"
Soton Seagull
Well-known member
Why did Nivea Cream?
Because Max Factor
Because Max Factor
pasty
A different kind of pasty
Blonde rings her garage and syas her car has run out of 710 and she doesn't know what to do.
The mechanic obviously hasn't got a clue so asks her to bring it in. When she does she shows him a cap in the engine and says "There you are see, this is where the 710 goes."
The mechanic turns the cap round and fills it with OIL
The mechanic obviously hasn't got a clue so asks her to bring it in. When she does she shows him a cap in the engine and says "There you are see, this is where the 710 goes."
The mechanic turns the cap round and fills it with OIL
