Craptastic Joke du Jour

[Soul Finger]

What's green and runs around people's gardens?

A hedge.

 

[¤DãŃn¥ §êãGüLL¤]

 

[Soul Finger]

Fair play Danny Seagull.

It was an exceptionally shite gag. But that's the point

 

[Northstander]

 

[dougdeep]

What's red and blue and slides down the table?

 

[fink]

Mum..." whats a cock" ?

"Its that thing dangling between a mans legs"


Mum...."Whats a C**T

" Thats the rest of him"

 

[smudge]

Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I can see into the future.

Really? When did the symptoms start?

Next Wednesday!

(I thank-you!)

 

[¡Cereal Killer!]

Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I can see into the future.

Really? When did the symptoms start?

Next Wednesday!

(I thank-you!)

LOL!

 

[MidlandSeagull69]

What's green and runs around people's gardens?

A hedge.

I was listening to Chris Moyles yesterday too,

 

[smudge]

Doctor, Doctor. I keep thinking I'm a dog.

Really? How long have you felt like this?

Ever since I was a puppy!!

(Wait, there's more!)

Lie on the couch.

I can't I'm not allowed!

 

[daveyboybhafc2]

How do you give a woman an orgasm?








Who cares?!!!

 

[smudge]

Ah, sexist jokes....a whole different tin of beans there!

Try this old chestnut.

How many men does it take to iron a shirt?

None, 'cos it's a woman's job!

 

[Soul Finger]

Chris Moyles!!

Never listen to that bellend.

Doctor, doctor. I've got a steering wheel glued to my knob.

It's driving me nuts!

Jesus, the old ones are the 'best'.

 

[(was)DBS]

why did the blonde woman crawl across the road?

because the sign said 'don't walk'

 

[(was)DBS]

How can you tell a blonde is having a bad day?


When her tampon is behind her ear and she can't find her pencil!

 

[Soul Finger]

How can you tell a blonde is having a bad day?


When her tampon is behind her ear and she can't find her pencil!

f*** me ragged Dannyboyseagull!

There's 'crap' as in; so bad they're actually funny.

Then there's 'crap' as in: bloody hell that's really shite.

Keep 'em coming!

 

[Soton Seagull]

I saw a man at the side of the road with the hazard lights going on his car. I asked him if he need a lift, he said 'yes', so I said:

'You look great, the world's your Oyster'

And then I went home.

 

[pasty]

Q. What do you get if you turn four blondes upside down ?

A. At least three brunettes

 

[Icy Gull]

What's the difference between PMT and BSE?



















One's mad cow disease, the others an agricultural problem

 

[Soul Finger]

I saw a man at the side of the road with the hazard lights going on his car. I asked him if he need a lift, he said 'yes', so I said:

'You look great, the world's your Oyster'

And then I went home.

That's more like it!!!