Bullying at work

[hart's shirt]

Revenge.

A dish best served cold.

 

[glasfryn]

many years ago I went to the hotel M*******E in Brighton to do some work on the bell system in the kitchens and it was like going to another planet I lost count of the younger workers there dodging slaps punches and all sorts of missiles and I don't know whether it was the noise or the heat there but everyone was bad tempered and when one of the chef's started to man handle the guy I was working with (young ....but not to be fecked about with)the chef got a very hard slap and we left them to it

not the sort of place to work if you are of a sensitive nature ..........having said that a smack on the head with the nearest pan normally brings things to a head.

 

[drew]

Firstly, you say he hit him. Well that could be a punch or just a cuff on the back of the head. I would presume it is the latter so before approaching the hotel manager and making enemies, surely he needs to have a quiet word with the chef and tell him that he wants to learn from him but that he doesn't appreciate physical admonishment. In most situations being shouted out would not be accepted but if you work in a kitchen then one would presume you have seen how Ramsay and Pierre White act so you probably have to accept it if you want to get on.

As for the hot fat, tell the guy who did it not to do it. If he repeats it then speak to the head chef.

Take it up with the protaganists firsts otherwise they will instantly be enemies. It could well be they were testing his resolve to see how far they can go. Make a stand now before it gets worse at which point there is normally no going back. Yes, you might be able to sue but if you want to work in the industry you don't want a reputation to follow you around, especially if similar practices go on elsewhere.

 

[Super Perry Digweed]

I would add (and this could be very important if it gets "legal") to make sure your son has noted down exactly what happened and when (ie dates / times). Keep this updated with anything else that happens.

Then if challenged, you can produce a diary of exactly what happened on what dates - this will give you much greater gravitas and is far better than saying "well I think such and such happened sometime in the first week of March but I can't quite remember the exact day" for eg. As another poster says, witnesses might come in handy to corroborate the incidents.

I sympathise with your son as something similar happened to me when I was the same age - it's not nice. My approach, for what it's worth, was to wait until just before my shift at their busiest possible time, and then go in, leave a letter of resignation stating exactly why I had left to the restaurant manager, and walk out again. Let 'em do their own washing up

Best of luck sorting it out!

 

[bhaexpress]

Actually if the Hotel Manager does not act your son can resign and immediately start proceedings for constructive dismissal. As long as the manager knows this unless he's an idiot he will have to act or face paying compensation plus bad publicity which he will have to explain to his bosses. Worth noting that should your son do the natural thing and retaliate he could end up on the wrong side of the law.

 

[Albalbion]

itll be because of his age, ive had loads of experience with people treating you like crap at work because youre much younger. worked in a call centre when i was sixteen and the more i think back to it, the more i realise how out of order that management were to all of the young staff, and because it was my first job and my age, i didnt know any different and let them get away with it, until i told one manager to stick her job up her arse, she then resigned to stopping shouting and asking me politely to carry on working. i also used to work at motherwell fc and found most of the chefs there to be arse holes, egotistical like someone has said on here. i never saw them try to hit anyone but i found that the chefs LOVED to shout at everyone in and around their kitchen, most of the staff found that if you have a go back at them, they back down a bit and calm down lol and at a haulage company i worked for, there was a massive fat prick i couldnt stand, so fat and slobbish, he was called jabba. was always having a dig at me when he could, pleasant enough to the other staff, but i guess being the youngest there, he thought hed get away with it, but again as soon as i stood up a bit and told him where to go, he backed down some. just need to tell your boy not to let them get the better of him, stand up a bit.

 

[Gazwag]

Bullying is rife at the conquest hospital in Hastings but the instigators are in HR so they get away with it and staff are forced to leave

 

[sod1]

That's his problem. Your boy's problem is bullying at work. It's only fair to go to the hotel manager to give him a chance to address your son's complaint. But if that looks like a non-starter, keep a diary, try and get some documentary evidence, then use employment laws.

exactly what i was going to say !

 

[wellquickwoody]

Not nice.

No advice to offer I'm afraid, but some nob will be on at some point to say something like 'grow some balls' or some such crap.

More likely to be said to you I would of thought.

 

[NMH]

It's rife it a country FULL of malcontent failures who need to blame others for their own underdog self-pity - by kicking the nearest other dog they can find.

I had it on building sites, they are obvious in construction too. As I don't go around being bolshy and I look fairly normal...no particular height or tattoo'd muscular intimidating physique - some have made an effort. Turning their own stuff back at them and humiliating them back has been my way, and I didn't mind going back to schoolboy stuff if they ask for it, but it's got me a couple of jobs 'shortened'. I still felt better about everything than kow-towing to some gormless pratt, but unfortunately it doesn't necessarily help keep me or them on the same job for long afterward. I also got barred from an old local for letting another twat know what I thought of him trying to intimidate me, but that's the way it goes - and in the long run they get their come-uppance either from me at another time, or from life in general.

It's surely better to take the high road, maybe maintain a level head and get witnesses etc. rather than fight fire with fire. Employment laws must be the ultimate checkmate if you can apply them with impunity. With phones having video functions on them, it's easy to record or film events - then it's cast iron!

 

[Shropshire Seagull]

My 17 yo daughter was doing pub waitressing - when the pub closed down she went to the one down the road. The chef thought that Gordan Ramsay's effing and blinding style was the norm and my daughter took a load of stick first night. She came home in tears. You can't change that kind of regime [yes, I know its wrong] so we rang up the manager and said she won't be coming back, please have her wages ready for collection. When the manager asked why [cos she was a good little worker] we said the environment was unsuitable [citing examples of the language] Manager laughed and said, thats what kitchens are like. Not where she last worked it wasn't !! Your loss !!

 

[Barrel of Fun]

Actually if the Hotel Manager does not act your son can resign and immediately start proceedings for constructive dismissal. As long as the manager knows this unless he's an idiot he will have to act or face paying compensation plus bad publicity which he will have to explain to his bosses. Worth noting that should your son do the natural thing and retaliate he could end up on the wrong side of the law.

Not true. You need to have worked somewhere for a year or over when suing for constructive dismissal.

 

[gullshark]

I was a kitchen porter for a few years whilst at Uni and yes, there is a bit of banter but it wasn't anything like what he's going through (hell, my head chef was ex Navy!). I think the worst I copped was when someone chucked mashed potato or cornflower at me - but we got him back by locking him in the fridge!

I cannot stand it when people openly abuse and are physically intimidating but immediately label it as banter.

 

[Billy the Fish]

Firstly, you say he hit him. Well that could be a punch or just a cuff on the back of the head. I would presume it is the latter so before approaching the hotel manager and making enemies, surely he needs to have a quiet word with the chef and tell him that he wants to learn from him but that he doesn't appreciate physical admonishment. In most situations being shouted out would not be accepted but if you work in a kitchen then one would presume you have seen how Ramsay and Pierre White act so you probably have to accept it if you want to get on.

As for the hot fat, tell the guy who did it not to do it. If he repeats it then speak to the head chef.

Take it up with the protaganists firsts otherwise they will instantly be enemies. It could well be they were testing his resolve to see how far they can go. Make a stand now before it gets worse at which point there is normally no going back. Yes, you might be able to sue but if you want to work in the industry you don't want a reputation to follow you around, especially if similar practices go on elsewhere.

This is sensible advice. ^

It always makes me laugh when people post a situation on NSC and everyone instantly says "citizens advice bureau" or "go to the police". My favourite was when Kev the ape got a death threat on facebook and some people said to dial 999 Get in the real world

 

[NMH]

I was a kitchen porter for a few years whilst at Uni and yes, there is a bit of banter but it wasn't anything like what he's going through (hell, my head chef was ex Navy!). I think the worst I copped was when someone chucked mashed potato or cornflower at me - but we got him back by locking him in the fridge!

I cannot stand it when people openly abuse and are physically intimidating but immediately label it as banter.

Yes, agreed.
Too bad the 'banterer' often has the upper hand of authority so can get away with their advantage. Otherwise, if you got the chops you let them have some of that banter with all and sundry witnesses laughing at their expense, and watch them get dead shirty at the 'banter'. If they pronounce it's all "banter" then they have to take what they dish out

 

[PILTDOWN MAN]

Thanks for all your replies. Sorry I would have got back quicker but only just got home after the game and visiting mates.

As I have stated I've owned 4 pubs and have worked in all as the chef at some point. I know that the environment is somewhat fraught at times and it can get a bit heavy shall we say.

As someone mentioned about my sons's work ethic and having had him work for me I can honestly say it wasn't always that great, however the abuse is not warranted and never is. If he's not up to the job then they should just say but it appears he's the whipping boy.

The problem I have is that he is an adult and if I was to turn up to fight his case this could truly undermine him. Added to this there are very little jobs in the Rye area.

Becoming a "problem" to the management/owner by complaining could make his life even worse. Perhaps is better for us to draft a letter of resignation stating the issues and why the position could never be resolved due to the working environment and let our solicitor have a gander at it. And then sue them.

 

[tedebear]

Thing is though, whoever this areshole is that is dishing it out, needs to be stopped. Whilst some "celebrity" chefs think it is acceptable, I can assure you that bullying both physical and mental is unacceptable whether you work in Claridges or in a pub in the back of beyond.

If it were me - I'd work along minding my own business and the next time it happens, make a statement, short and sweet such as " Dont touch me". Make it loud enough for a few others to hear, but not loud enough to sound hysterical. He should be shocked that someone has actually decided to stand up to him. If it happens again, make the same statement. Third time, add the comment - thats the third time you;ve done that and now I'm going to ask for advice from senior management - and then it goes legal.

It is inappropriate in any workplace, and this thug (who probably has self esteem issues) needs to be corrected!

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

My 17 yo daughter was doing pub waitressing - when the pub closed down she went to the one down the road. The chef thought that Gordan Ramsay's effing and blinding style was the norm and my daughter took a load of stick first night. She came home in tears. You can't change that kind of regime

Yes you can. But only if you refuse to take shit from some fucktard pub chef.

 

[Seagull over Canaryland]

The advice given in reply #10 appears sound, especially the need to act promptly. No excuse that it is a pressured environment such as a commercial kitchen. Make a written contemporaneous note of what occurred sticking purely to objective facts. In any case of workplace harrassment it is most important to tell the harasser that their behaviour is not acceptable - unless there is a fundamental breakdown in relations. A newly appointed employee is most vulnerable especially if there is no evidence of workplace induction or training. Most important to report the matter to senior management ASAP and ask for a formal interview and be accompanied by an accredited rep or workplace advocate or at least a trusted colleague or friend to act as a witness. The are some helpful Solicitors or legal advisers who will give free initial advice on employment related disputes and how to proceed, particularly if the employer fails to treat the matter seriously. Ultimately the individual may not feel able to continue in this job but at least those responsible for harrassment will feel the heat themselves and hopefully their behaviour will change. If not there are potential grounds to apply to a tribunal for harrassment and/or constructive dismissal. Good luck.

 

[Barrel of Fun]

He'd only have a case if he were sacked. Constructive dismissal would need employment of a year or more.