.......... as a ..........

[culvers]

As dry as gandhi's sandle.

Actually that ones pretty damn poor

 

[Lammy]

Tight as a camal's arse in a sandstorm!

As welcome as a horny dog in a miss lovely legs competition!

As tight as a Knat's chuff!

 

[CHAPPERS]

As sweaty as a paedophile in a nursery.

 

[Everest]

As enlightening as a NIMBY village visit.

 

[Bluejuice]

Funny as f***

in fact how come 'as f***' works for pretty much anything?

Drunk as f***

Ugly as f***

Tired as f***

Bored as f***

I really need a f***

 

[dougdeep]

As poor as Palace.

 

[Virgo's Haircut]

Camp as a row of tents

 

[The Wookiee]

Bent as a nine bob note