[Football] Zaha watch - *** The SEGW finally managed to escape***

[Easy 10]

"Martin Tyler here, excited to be reporting from the Stade De Clad where the Bolly Eyed Turf Magnet will be falling over today for the Jesters. The coked up chavs in black are banging their drum and Alan Smith has just dodged a falling piece of masonry. What a shithole..... AND IT'S LIVE!"

Marvellous.

 

[Triggaaar]

The lack of a release clause being negotiated by Judicael (sic) Zaha when Wilf returned from his abject failure in Manchester to achieve anything more than an alleged bunk up with Moyes’ daughter the phrase “beggars can’t be choosers” applies. I imagine the bolly eyed turf magnet was pretty embarrassed with himself and keen to take whatever shitty deal on offer.

Yes I wouldn't have expected him to have a release clause then, but that was years ago. I would have expected a release clause to be part of any contract renewal, after he'd proven himself in the PL with Palace. Particularly given that he's wanted out both last summer, and the summer before.

 

[Papa Lazarou]

While that might happen at a normal club with some self respect, Palace wouldn't take £25m in an effort to pay their bills, they'd carry on as if nothing was wrong until they could no longer afford to pay the cleaners, at which point they'd enter administration number 3. Even then, they'd do everything they could to avoid selling players, choosing to screw over others instead.

Well exactly. Their pride is more important than balancing the books. All it takes is one injury and their £100m asset is worthless.

 

[Postman Pat]

Cheers Easy. I'd seen it on this thread I think so I was wondering about it. The only logical argument I could think of against the 'sometimes they are trying to offload a high wage earner' was that the selling club would use some of the funds to cover the contract pay out. But in many cases in the lower leagues, it probably wouldn't cover it. It does make you wonder why Real are pushing back on the China offer for Bale - surely they want rid of the eye-watering wages and they aren't likely to get a massive fee for him simply due to his wage demands etc. Maybe it's as simple as Zidane not wanting him to be a £1m per week player and blocking him solely based on that.

I thought the impact of handing in a transfer request was that the player forfeits any 'loyalty bonus' that is in the contract, which can be a hefty sum, especially for someone like Zaha I suspect. Mind you he loves the club so much he probably is doing it for love anyway.

 

[CPFC G]

"Martin Tyler here, excited to be reporting from the Stade De Clad where the Bolly Eyed Turf Magnet will be falling over today for the Jesters. The coked up chavs in black are banging their drum and Alan Smith has just dodged a falling piece of masonry. What a shithole..... AND IT'S LIVE!"

Martin Tyler here, not particalrty excited to be reporting from the AMEX, a new build with no soul,history or atmosphere. I'm here to report on probably the most dull football team in the league, winning just 1 game at home this year. The north stand is half empty as Chelsea are on TV later. AND IT'S LIVE! if I can manage to stay awake.

 

[SIMMO SAYS]

Martin Tyler here, not particalrty excited to be reporting from the AMEX, a new build with no soul,history or atmosphere. I'm here to report on probably the most dull football team in the league, winning just 1 game at home this year. The north stand is half empty as Chelsea are on TV later. AND IT'S LIVE! if I can manage to stay awake.

Oh oh the schools have broken up

 

[LlcoolJ]

Martin Tyler here, not particalrty excited to be reporting from the AMEX, a new build with no soul,history or atmosphere. I'm here to report on probably the most dull football team in the league, winning just 1 game at home this year. The north stand is half empty as Chelsea are on TV later. AND IT'S LIVE! if I can manage to stay awake.

Lol!!! Is that the best comeback you can manage? [emoji23]

1/10 and that's being generous. "Must try harder".

 

[LlcoolJ]

I thought the impact of handing in a transfer request was that the player forfeits any 'loyalty bonus' that is in the contract, which can be a hefty sum, especially for someone like Zaha I suspect. Mind you he loves the club so much he probably is doing it for love anyway.

Love and God. Don't forget God, he's great. Apparently.

 

[schmunk]

Martin Tyler here, not particalrty excited to be reporting from the AMEX, a new build with no soul,history or atmosphere. I'm here to report on probably the most dull football team in the league, winning just 1 game at home this year. The north stand is half empty as Chelsea are on TV later. AND IT'S LIVE! if I can manage to stay awake.

Oh, where would I prefer to be...?

I imagine poppy-based products can be found nearby the Stad to take the edge off the EXCITEMENT.

 

[Springal]

Martin Tyler here, not particalrty excited to be reporting from the AMEX, a new build with no soul,history or atmosphere..

CPFC2010
No atmosphere once the bongo brothers and hoodie gang got split up
Ramshackle shit hole located in the toilet of South London

 

[lawros left foot]

Martin Tyler here, not particalrty excited to be reporting from the AMEX, a new build with no soul,history or atmosphere. I'm here to report on probably the most dull football team in the league, winning just 1 game at home this year. The north stand is half empty as Chelsea are on TV later. AND IT'S LIVE! if I can manage to stay awake.

Ah, bless.

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

 

[super-seagulls]

Agreed.

BETM and SEGW both highly welcome additions to our vernacular. Add in the Stad de Clad, and we truly are living in a golden age.

There is also;
The Googley Eyed Swan Diver
&
The Bug Eyed Blade Tripper

 

[Garry Nelson's Left Foot]

Martin Tyler here, not particalrty excited to be reporting from the AMEX, a new build with no soul,history or atmosphere. I'm here to report on probably the most dull football team in the league, winning just 1 game at home this year. The north stand is half empty as Chelsea are on TV later. AND IT'S LIVE! if I can manage to stay awake.

Hey G, don't listen to the naysayers. That's a wonderfully acerbic piece of writing you've produced there. Don't let their negativity get you down, they're just jealous.

 

[LlcoolJ]

Ah, bless.

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Or it would be if his effort wasn't so pathetically shit. [emoji23]

You have to worry about someone who wrote that, read it back and thought "yep, I'll post that, that'll get one over on those Brighton *****!".

I know Palace don't do self awareness, but still. Why embarrass yourself?

 

[LlcoolJ]

Hey G, don't listen to the naysayers. That's a wonderfully acerbic piece of writing you've produced there. Don't let their negativity get you down, they're just jealous.

*spits tea over keyboard* [emoji23]

 

[miffy6]

Martin Tyler here, not particalrty excited to be reporting from the AMEX, a new build with no soul,history or atmosphere. I'm here to report on probably the most dull football team in the league, winning just 1 game at home this year. The north stand is half empty as Chelsea are on TV later. AND IT'S LIVE! if I can manage to stay awake.

 

[papajaff]

Martin Tyler here, not particalrty excited to be reporting from the AMEX, a new build with no soul,history or atmosphere...

How CAN we compete with that?

 

[BBassic]

How CAN we compete with that?

We could nab another 6pts off them next year. That'd work for me, in a competetitive sense.

 

[Triggaaar]

Hey G, don't listen to the naysayers. That's a wonderfully acerbic piece of writing you've produced there. Don't let their negativity get you down, they're just jealous.

He's given you a thumbs-up

 

[Sheebo]

And another Nigel makes them self look very silly and gets ‘owned’ - oh dear blud!