Your Valentines Day

[Starry]

f*** Valentine's Day. Just an excuse for the greetings card industry to con gullible people out of money. f*** 'em.

I love my missus every day, anyway. I don't need some wet behind the ears card writer to tell her that.

i made my own card. whipped it up in paint at about half eleven last night.

 

[Beach Hut]

Beachy, Beachy. You didn't fall for that old chestnut did you.

Yep, however just had a very pleasant lunch in Nia at Shoreham so now in her good books again

 

[Mrs Coach]

If you want a great Valentines evening, follow this advice from one who knows the psycho workings of the female mind. Get the dinner and washing up out of the way as quickly as possible, bath the kids (or the dog if you dont have kids - or yourself, if you smell whiffy from the day's work) and get the kids to bed on the promise of a fiver if they stay in bed for the rest of the night.

Turn down the lights, shut the tv off and and put 'Liberian Girl' by Michael Jackson quietly on the stereo and beckon your women towards you seductively with the lure of a cadbury's wispa bar, with an eyebrow raise that would put the Rock to shame. Using 'Patrick Swayze' style knee sways (as in dirty dancing, or roadhouse) as you hold her in your arms hum quietly to the song, then when it finished, take her hand and head towards the bedroom (if it's got a lock on it, or the bathroom if not!)

Idiot-proof! Mrs Coach five star guarantee! That song (which I used to think was called 'Librarian Girl' in my youth!) was made to hypnotise women with seductive harmonies! Heheheheh.

 

[The Wookiee]

Yep, however just had a very pleasant lunch in Nia at Shoreham so now in her good books again

Did you bury the beef bayonet ?

 

[Fourteenth Eye]

I shall woo mrs Eye with dinner & then make her do the washing up whilst i watch Ashes to ashes

 

[Beach Hut]

Did you bury the beef bayonet ?

Not yet but planning to tonight thanks...........................

 

[Mrs Coach]

Turn down the lights, shut the tv off and and put 'Liberian Girl' by Michael Jackson quietly on the stereo and beckon your women towards you seductively with the lure of a cadbury's wispa bar, with an eyebrow raise that would put the Rock to shame. Using 'Patrick Swayze' style knee sways (as in dirty dancing, or roadhouse) as you hold her in your arms hum quietly to the song, then when it finished, take her hand and head towards the bedroom (if it's got a lock on it, or the bathroom if not!)

Did you bury the beef bayonet ?

Please note the subtle differences between the male and female mind!

 

[Beach Hut]

If you want a great Valentines evening, follow this advice from one who knows the psycho workings of the female mind. Get the dinner and washing up out of the way as quickly as possible, bath the kids (or the dog if you dont have kids - or yourself, if you smell whiffy from the day's work) and get the kids to bed on the promise of a fiver if they stay in bed for the rest of the night.

Turn down the lights, shut the tv off and and put 'Liberian Girl' by Michael Jackson quietly on the stereo and beckon your women towards you seductively with the lure of a cadbury's wispa bar, with an eyebrow raise that would put the Rock to shame. Using 'Patrick Swayze' style knee sways (as in dirty dancing, or roadhouse) as you hold her in your arms hum quietly to the song, then when it finished, take her hand and head towards the bedroom (if it's got a lock on it, or the bathroom if not!)

Idiot-proof! Mrs Coach five star guarantee! That song (which I used to think was called 'Librarian Girl' in my youth!) was made to hypnotise women with seductive harmonies! Heheheheh.

OK I've got the CD ready and the Wispa Bar so what time shall I call round

 

[Mrs Coach]

BH, you just made me splutter tea all over the screen! lol!

I tell you though...... if you've really got a wispa bar........

No, no, no, I love Mr Coach........

Mmmmnnn. Cadburys.....

 

[Mrs Coach]

And unless you've got some fetish for a lobster handed girl?........

Lol!

 

[Beach Hut]

And unless you've got some fetish for a lobster handed girl?........

Lol!

Explain - what does a lobster handed girl do then ?

 

[ben andrews' girlfriend]

BH, you just made me splutter tea all over the screen! lol!

I tell you though...... if you've really got a wispa bar........

No, no, no, I love Mr Coach........

Mmmmnnn. Cadburys.....

Mmmmm Wispa!!! I haven't had one of those in years!

 

[federicoed-up]

Mmmmm Wispa!!! I haven't had one of those in years!

Would you like me to give you one?

 

[Pretty pink fairy]

Mmmmm Wispa!!! I haven't had one of those in years!

just stick to your mochas 650 cals

 

[The Wookiee]

Please note the subtle differences between the male and female mind!

Did you read my post about what I am doing tonight ?

Gave flowers and card this morning.

I am off for a five course meal this evening with an overnight stay here:

http://www.stanhillcourthotel.co.uk/

She knows nothing about it.
I have packed her overnight bag and will pick her up from work as normal and drive straight to the hotel !!

 

[Pretty pink fairy]

If that makes you both happy then bollocks to what people say. You keep doing it if it's what you both like.

just been sick!

 

[bright1064]

Would you like me to give you one?

oooooooooooh saucy!

 

[csider]

got a card from an ex who stayed over week or so back, she hid it and called me yesterday to say where it was. nice jesture, only problem is she lives in france....for now!!

Probably get a hooker round later.

 

[Pretty pink fairy]

Did you read my post about what I am doing tonight ?

have you got a blow up doll in that bag??

 

[federicoed-up]

Romantic evening in for me.. dinner, bottle of wine, session then football manager 2008 8.0.2 update for HOURS!