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Worst Pitch you every played on



piersa

Well-known member
Apr 17, 2011
3,155
London




One Love

Well-known member
Aug 22, 2011
4,488
Brighton
ditchlin road the pitches just by the entrance to the golf course....on a slope and hell in teh winter

Played on there with a gale blowing down the hill once.

Our goalkicks were reaching the 18 yd box and then lifting in the wind and being blown back over the bar.

Cue goalie running down the hill to fetch the ball so the same thing could happen again.
 


One Love

Well-known member
Aug 22, 2011
4,488
Brighton
Before Health & Safety came into force, I played on a pitch at Greeleas, probably 80 or 81 that was frozen solid. Most of us back then had screw in studded boots, made for an interesting game!

Can remember a game for the school where the pitch had been covered with a layer of ice. It had thawed sufficiently to crack the ice so it was like playing on a pitch with broken panes of glass strewn everywhere. Sliding tackles were fun!
 


PILTDOWN MAN

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Sep 15, 2004
19,597
Hurst Green
Pitch at Hamilton Rd Horsham. Looks great, flat not a problem but and a huge but it used to be an old brick yard and bricks were for ever appearing when the pitch become muddy. I used to play in goal and was forever getting cut legs, arms and torso from diving. Unfortunately it was our home pitch for 3 years.
 


The Spanish

Well-known member
Aug 12, 2008
6,478
P
Played on there with a gale blowing down the hill once.

Our goalkicks were reaching the 18 yd box and then lifting in the wind and being blown back over the bar.

Cue goalie running down the hill to fetch the ball so the same thing could happen again.

could be brutal up there. if northerners ever think southerners are soft they should try playing up there in winter. like something out of kes except looking down on a seaside town rather than a a mill town.
 




Guinness Boy

Tofu eating wokerati
Helpful Moderator
NSC Patron
Jul 23, 2003
37,342
Up and Coming Sunny Portslade
Played schoolboy football at Wish Road in the 70s and away games in Sunday junior games at Plumpton and can attest to the dogshit and tractor marks though I never minded playing at Plumpton as it meant you were playing Bridgeview which in those days was a guaranteed 5-0 win or better.

I hate old skool astroturf, worse if like at PCC it sometimes has 'interesting' debris on it.

However, for just over 2 years, I played for an ex pat team in Taiwan when I was working there. One day our regular pitch was double booked so a few of us bunked in to what we thought was a local turn up and play 5-a-side pitch in the middle of a traffic intersection. It had 2 goals, no markings and was pitted with sticks, stones and stuff that smelled distinctly unpleasant. We played for 10 minutes and then went for a beer.
 


SIMMO SAYS

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2012
11,749
Incommunicado
Wivelsfield Green used to be like a bog in the winter. I remember having a shot at goal and the ball stopped dead on the goal line only for my mate to slam it in from 1". I meanwhile was running off up the pitch celebrating the strike of the season!
Our Home pitch at one time was Knoll Rec. We used to drain the puddles of water with buckets before the ref arrived so he didnt call it off.
We would see people let their dogs crap all over it while waiting to get fecking changed!! :sick:
 


wehatepalace

Limbs
NSC Patron
Apr 27, 2004
7,332
Pease Pottage
i'm gonna plump for plumpton as well, but the rugby club. pitch was in the middle of the racecourse and one of my team actually broke his ankle cause he ran into a divot and got his foot stuck.
Played on that too, truly shocking as are their very poor excuse for a changing room :lolol:

Also Cranleigh RFC the pitch that is set down the road from the clubhouse, an absolute quagmire and it stank !
Remember playing at our ground in Crawley when the pitch partially flooded at one end, running across the try line for a try diving and aquaplaning through the water and straight out across the dead ball line ! f*** me that was cold !
 




chrissyboy01

New member
Sep 24, 2011
471
East Brighton Park in about 2000. Total quagmire of a pitch resulting in a compound fracture for one of the opposition. Can still hear the snap of his shin followed by an eerie silence before the screaming kicked in. Grim
 


Barrel of Fun

Abort, retry, fail
A little pitch on the coast of Lake Malawi. The ground was like sandpaper. I was in goal and lost most of the skin on my legs. We lost 3-1 to the delight of the 3,000 strong and partisan crowd.

The Dyke fields at Lancing were pretty dire. They appeared to be below sea-level, judging by the pools of water come winter. Although they were great for slide tackles and Klinsmann dives.
 
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loz

Well-known member
Apr 27, 2009
2,482
W.Sussex
Does anyone remember the Uckfield pitch that used to run up the other side of the high street..if you wernt 5-0 up at half time you would lose 6-5 it was that steep.

Also there was a pitch in front of east court house in East grinstead called the Cup and saucer, if you know were I mean you cant believe anyone put a pitch there. In fact we were asked to play a semi final there in the late 80s and both teams refused!!
 






Raleigh Chopper

New member
Sep 1, 2011
12,054
Plymouth
When I lived in T Wells I played for Matfield on a pitch in Brenchley. If you stood on the goal line at one end you could only see the crossbar at the other end, but the slope from touchline to touchline was twice as bad. No grass always ankle deep in mud, and when it froze the lumpy mud was lethal. No wonder I have one leg shorter than the other.
 










TS90

New member
Jan 26, 2011
818
Braypool about 6 years ago, in a game just after new year. There were two, 10 yard wide channels on either flank that were maybe just about playable where as the rest of the pitch was ankle deep mud. Can't believe we talked the ref into letting us play on it.
 








One Love

Well-known member
Aug 22, 2011
4,488
Brighton
The worst thing for me, being of the weak ankle ligaments type was the tendency for the groundsman to make the lines on the pitch a few feet below sea level compared to the rest of the pitch. I mean was is that all about?

If your not looking where you are putting your feet which is often bearing in mind you should be keeping your eye on the ball you tend to trip down the line on the six yard box.
 


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