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***World's Hardest Creature VIII NOMINATIONS***



Withdean11

Well-known member
Feb 18, 2007
2,908
Brighton/Hyde
The Tardigrade

Can live in boiling water, solid ice, can survive a decade without water, deepest trenches of the sea, and in space when subject to cosmic radiation. Has dagger-like teeth. Here before us, and will be here long after us.


I third the Tardigrade.

Pound for pound, this thing is a beast and can literally fight it's rivals ANYWHERE!

Would like to see that pathetic little shrimp fight in the dessert...
 






fruitnveg

Well-known member
Jul 22, 2010
2,256
Waitrose. Veg aisles
Still #TeamMantis but I nominate Rohan Ince.

This boy is hard as f*cking nails. Quick, tough and powerful, he is the spiritual successor to the now retired hardest creature of football: Patrick Viera. Last season with Incey in the side we lost something only four or five times out of the 30+ games he played. It is no coincidence we have seen an upturn in form following his restoration to the starting XI.

Foot like a traction engine and all.


Seconded. I'd like to see how he fares.

Also, nominating last years champion. The Mantis Shrimp. http://theoatmeal.com/comics/mantis_shrimp
 


Bold Seagull

strong and stable with me, or...
Mar 18, 2010
30,465
Hove
The Tardigrade

Can live in boiling water, solid ice, can survive a decade without water, deepest trenches of the sea, and in space when subject to cosmic radiation. Has dagger-like teeth. Here before us, and will be here long after us.


I third the Tardigrade.

Pound for pound, this thing is a beast and can literally fight it's rivals ANYWHERE!

Would like to see that pathetic little shrimp fight in the dessert...

The Tardigrade is only hard because it exists. It's not aggressively hard, it's passive. It's hard like a germ is hard, or a virus. No vote for me. Hardness is surely about aggression, a willingness to take risks in taking on an opponent bigger and stronger than you.

#teamant
 


SweatyMexican

Well-known member
Mar 31, 2013
4,155
How about the Australian Box Jellyfish? They have 60 tentacles each and be up to 15 feet long, and each tentacle has 5,000 stinging cells with enough toxins to kill 60 humans in one shot.
 
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Mellotron

I've asked for soup
Jul 2, 2008
32,479
Brighton
Talking of which, lets go over hardness qualities. No one thing can alone define hardness. Attitude, strength, hardiness/ability to withstand a battering, adaptability, arsenal of weapons are all important facets of hardness.

It appears the definition has changed.

Previously it was clearly set out that the main criteria was "pound for pound" hardness. i.e. how tough something is FOR it's size and capabilities, and the sort of fights it picks. That's the point. Nothing "hard" whatsoever about a massively strong killer whale eating smaller fish.

Hardness is a mentality. Hardness is asking yourself which animal would most likely walk into a pub (being the smallest guy in there), smash a glass over it's own head, and BELLOW "right, who ****en' wants some then?!!!"

Hardness is having the odds MASSIVELY stacked against you, and simply not giving a shit, and fighting for the sake of fighting.

Hardness is NOT a tooled up superman who can just take out anything it likes, whenever it likes. That's the literal dictionary definition OPPOSITE of hard. That's EASY.

Otherwise, Human wins every single year. Obviously. Nuclear bombs.
 
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Mellotron

I've asked for soup
Jul 2, 2008
32,479
Brighton
Remember, this competition is about POUND FOR POUND HARDNESS. Look at the relative size of the centipede and scorpion in the above videos to the Mouse. Then, consider that they're both extremely poisonous.

You ruined your own argument by mentioning that it's IMMUNE to poison. Therefore, it's prey being poisonous means absolutely **** all and is a moot point.
 


Seagull27

Well-known member
Feb 7, 2011
3,368
Bristol
You ruined your own argument by mentioning that it's IMMUNE to poison. Therefore, it's prey being poisonous means absolutely **** all and is a moot point.

Surely being immune to poison itself makes it HARD? As outlined by [MENTION=286]Garry Nelson's Left Foot[/MENTION] in the OP, the rules state that HARDness means having a range of qualities such as "Attitude, strength, hardiness/ability to withstand a battering, adaptability, arsenal of weapons". I'd say that the Grasshopper Mouse's immunity to poison is a mixture of hardiness/ability to withstand a battering, and adaptability.

In any case, it's one of the arguments used by many Honey Badger supporters to show how hard it is that it eats snakes - it is immune to their venom.
 






Kazenga <3

Test 805843
Feb 28, 2010
4,870
Team c/r HQ
It appears the definition has changed.

Previously it was clearly set out that the main criteria was "pound for pound" hardness. i.e. how tough something is FOR it's size and capabilities, and the sort of fights it picks. That's the point. Nothing "hard" whatsoever about a massively strong killer whale eating smaller fish.

Hardness is a mentality. Hardness is asking yourself which animal would most likely walk into a pub (being the smallest guy in there), smash a glass over it's own head, and BELLOW "right, who ****en' wants some then?!!!"

Hardness is having the odds MASSIVELY stacked against you, and simply not giving a shit, and fighting for the sake of fighting.

Hardness is NOT a tooled up superman who can just take out anything it likes, whenever it likes. That's the literal dictionary definition OPPOSITE of hard. That's EASY.

Otherwise, Human wins every single year. Obviously. Nuclear bombs.

100% spot on. A condensation of this should be posted underneath every poll with a reminder not to vote until you know the rules religiously.

On that note I'd like to endorse the Cassowary, it's an absolute f*ckmentalist of a bird who is so consumed by its desire to prove its hardness it will take on CARS. The velociraptor of the Pacific really couldn't give two shits and this "behemoth of a bird has a face perpetually frozen in an expression resembling that of a frat bro who just challenged you to a bar fight. A bar fight for your life. "

fbeb4f1e9b3dae5ca842c0d220b4acfe.jpg
 


Bold Seagull

strong and stable with me, or...
Mar 18, 2010
30,465
Hove
100% spot on. A condensation of this should be posted underneath every poll with a reminder not to vote until you know the rules religiously.

On that note I'd like to endorse the Cassowary, it's an absolute f*ckmentalist of a bird who is so consumed by its desire to prove its hardness it will take on CARS. The velociraptor of the Pacific really couldn't give two shits and this "behemoth of a bird has a face perpetually frozen in an expression resembling that of a frat bro who just challenged you to a bar fight. A bar fight for your life. "

I'll second the Cassowary. Hard.
 




Kazenga <3

Test 805843
Feb 28, 2010
4,870
Team c/r HQ
Surely being immune to poison itself makes it HARD? As outlined by [MENTION=286]Garry Nelson's Left Foot[/MENTION] in the OP, the rules state that HARDness means having a range of qualities such as "Attitude, strength, hardiness/ability to withstand a battering, adaptability, arsenal of weapons". I'd say that the Grasshopper Mouse's immunity to poison is a mixture of hardiness/ability to withstand a battering, and adaptability.

In any case, it's one of the arguments used by many Honey Badger supporters to show how hard it is that it eats snakes - it is immune to their venom.

Ah see that's the thing. Common myth perpetuated by those who would see the noble Ratel fall once again. The People's Champion is NOT actually immune to snake venom, or indeed bee stings. It has exceptionally tough skin, minimising the impact, yet still fights through the pain, Honey Badgers have been known to die from venom but this does not deter them one bit- nails. Evidence of its hardness in this regard is that often the HB is knocked clean out by the venom, no matter though, he just has a little lie down then wakes up and GOES AGAIN because he just couldn't care less. That my learned friend is what this competition is all about.

Much respect to the grasshopper mouse though, a worthy adversary.
 


Seagull27

Well-known member
Feb 7, 2011
3,368
Bristol
Ah see that's the thing. Common myth perpetuated by those who would see the noble Ratel fall once again. The People's Champion is NOT actually immune to snake venom, or indeed bee stings. It has exceptionally tough skin, minimising the impact, yet still fights through the pain, Honey Badgers have been known to die from venom but this does not deter them one bit- nails. Evidence of its hardness in this regard is that often the HB is knocked clean out by the venom, no matter though, he just has a little lie down then wakes up and GOES AGAIN because he just couldn't care less. That my learned friend is what this competition is all about.

Much respect to the grasshopper mouse though, a worthy adversary.

Fair enough, I stand corrected. But I still consider immunity to poison to be an attribute of hardness, and not something that counts against the Grasshopper Mouse. In any case, I fully believe it carries many other HARD attributes that are similar to, and rival, the honey badger, pound for pound of course.
 


Garry Nelson's Left Foot

Well-known member
Jul 7, 2003
13,528
tokyo
It appears the definition has changed.

Previously it was clearly set out that the main criteria was "pound for pound" hardness. i.e. how tough something is FOR it's size and capabilities, and the sort of fights it picks. That's the point. Nothing "hard" whatsoever about a massively strong killer whale eating smaller fish.

Hardness is a mentality. Hardness is asking yourself which animal would most likely walk into a pub (being the smallest guy in there), smash a glass over it's own head, and BELLOW "right, who ****en' wants some then?!!!"

Hardness is having the odds MASSIVELY stacked against you, and simply not giving a shit, and fighting for the sake of fighting.

Hardness is NOT a tooled up superman who can just take out anything it likes, whenever it likes. That's the literal dictionary definition OPPOSITE of hard. That's EASY.

Otherwise, Human wins every single year. Obviously. Nuclear bombs.

No, it's the same criteria as always and we're still going for pound for pound. The criteria I set out are what goes into being hard. It's not just one facet that decides hardness. There are a number of things that should be considered including those set out in my o.p and indeed, your mentality point above.

I think if you rely purely on what you've argued above, you'd actually be arguing for humans. We fight for fun, for money for anything. We invent weapons so we can fight anyone, anywhere, anytime. We fight with our fists, with rocks, with anything to hand, with knives, with guns, with bombs. We invent things to create more death and destruction. We have fights that cover the entire globe and last for years.
 






Baldseagull

Well-known member
Jan 26, 2012
11,839
Crawley
Surely being immune to poison itself makes it HARD? As outlined by [MENTION=286]Garry Nelson's Left Foot[/MENTION] in the OP, the rules state that HARDness means having a range of qualities such as "Attitude, strength, hardiness/ability to withstand a battering, adaptability, arsenal of weapons". I'd say that the Grasshopper Mouse's immunity to poison is a mixture of hardiness/ability to withstand a battering, and adaptability.

In any case, it's one of the arguments used by many Honey Badger supporters to show how hard it is that it eats snakes - it is immune to their venom.

The Honey Badger isn't immune to snake Venom or bee stings, but it tolerates them. The Grasshopper mouse receiving a scorpion sting apparently doesn't have to tolerate it as it metabolises a pain killer from it, clever, but not hard.
 


Guinness Boy

Tofu eating wokerati
Helpful Moderator
NSC Patron
Jul 23, 2003
37,348
Up and Coming Sunny Portslade
The Tardigrade is only hard because it exists. It's not aggressively hard, it's passive. It's hard like a germ is hard, or a virus. No vote for me. Hardness is surely about aggression, a willingness to take risks in taking on an opponent bigger and stronger than you.

#teamant

Like a HELICOPTER you mean?

#TeamShark
 


Seagull27

Well-known member
Feb 7, 2011
3,368
Bristol
The Honey Badger isn't immune to snake Venom or bee stings, but it tolerates them. The Grasshopper mouse receiving a scorpion sting apparently doesn't have to tolerate it as it metabolises a pain killer from it, clever, but not hard.

Then you could say the same about the Honey Badger's thick skin. Clever. Not hard.
 




dazzer6666

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Mar 27, 2013
55,580
Burgess Hill
It appears the definition has changed.

Previously it was clearly set out that the main criteria was "pound for pound" hardness. i.e. how tough something is FOR it's size and capabilities, and the sort of fights it picks. That's the point. Nothing "hard" whatsoever about a massively strong killer whale eating smaller fish.

Hardness is a mentality. Hardness is asking yourself which animal would most likely walk into a pub (being the smallest guy in there), smash a glass over it's own head, and BELLOW "right, who ****en' wants some then?!!!"

Hardness is having the odds MASSIVELY stacked against you, and simply not giving a shit, and fighting for the sake of fighting.

Hardness is NOT a tooled up superman who can just take out anything it likes, whenever it likes. That's the literal dictionary definition OPPOSITE of hard. That's EASY.

Otherwise, Human wins every single year. Obviously. Nuclear bombs.

The Tardigrade is tiny, and basically indestructible. Pound for pound that makes it officially well hard as a minimum. Frankly it would smirk at a nuclear bomb, and just carry on doing what it does.
 




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