Putting the 1979 Conservative Government aside for a moment. The UK in 1979 was bust, with huge longterm structural problems. Not the fault of one party, but a perfect storm of huge WW2 debt, weak governments of both parties, inept senior management industry who hadn't modernised and some very strong trade unions with tunnel vision for their interests alone. It wasn't a brief economic storm to be rode out. The country produced poor quality products beaten by an ever increasing list of up and coming nations, big industries such as shipbuilding faced a lack of orders as other countries produced better and cheaper, and 10,000,000's working days were lost per annum in strikes.
The feel of even places such as Brighton and Hove seafront was of things being rundown, due to a lack of public money over decades. Anecdotally, several British music artists in that era, have spoken of Britain being bleak, economically bleak.
The Conservative government was a reaction to all that, with a hard line monetarist ethos initially, then a boom.
In hindsight, I'd say an ideological sledge hammer to crack a chronically sick nut. There could've been a middle ground, but you might not have agreed with that either? What I have in mind is that we should've looked at targeting new niche industries such as specialist shipbuilding in the same way the Germans and Italians have and still do. I do think that over time most coal mines would have shut down. But the transition could have been far more gentle.
British way of life. I'm not sure if you meant the following, but the worst changes IMO have been everything is far more fast paced, 24-7 retail shopping, Sunday's millions have to work, those in SE England spend half their lives now paying huge mortgage payments (due to underlying high land values). To summarise a treadmill of working hard and materialism/consumerism. In fairness, many other countries have had to change too to survive. The French tried a 4 day short working week with collosal holiday leave, and it proved economically unsustainable. Macron is now modernising.
Looking at it dispassionately I agree that we deseperately needed to change and I agree with your diagnosis. But thatcher did it all in such a nasty sneering doctrinaire fashion. And it really was about destroying anything socialist. I still remember her being interviewed about the way the police had stepped out of line (again), and hr response was 'the british police - arent they marvellous' an attitude to oversight that paved the way for the sneering arrogance that allowed Hillsborough to happen. Even her own party stabbed her in the back in the. The picture of her crying for herslf in the back of the car leaving downing street still fills me with pleasure.
I am all for harsh reform, if applied even-handedly. Thatcher and her ilk were no nation savers. The short sharp shock to crack crime; unemployment as a tool to control the proles; the sale of council houses at a knock down price; and the loadsamoney attitude and its associated sneering; no, you can shove thatcher as far as I'm concerned.
All that said, had she been a tough but compassionate reformer she'd have not got in. Alan Clark had some insight, recognising that she appealed to the masochism in many males.