what would you do?

[Bakesy]

Looks like your "caps lock" needs fixing

hOWS tHAT?aNY bETTER?

 

[Caveman]

Then for a present I would send a book on family values.

Or a picture of Iain Dowie ?

 

[Shropshire Seagull]

Is there another agenda here?

Are there a lot of kids in the family and he doesn't want to shell out for the reception for loads of them?
Is there one particular family who has 'orrible kids and rather than exclude just them has taken the unilateral approach of banning all kids.

Pick the phone up and speak to him, tell him you are very upset your little girl is not welcome and ask him to explain why - its good to talk (although uncomforatable with some subjects I admit).

Don't spoil a lifetime freindship without talking first - you can never go back and change history.

PS I admire your family morals - but please talk it through before its too late.

 

[B.M.F]

Sorry BR but it is your Brothers big day and what he wants he should surely have and you should respect his wishes. I can see your point but it is the same as you wanting to take your missus on the stag do etc.
You should go simple as. I am sure you do not take your daughter out when you go on the beer?

 

[Juan Albion]

Can't you just park your caravan next to theirs and pop between the two?

 

[Biscuit]

Its your brothers wedding. Go.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

brother invited me and my misses to his wedding but he does not want my 3 year old to girl to attend he want an adult only bash.
trouble is i am a big family man and i alway put my kid first and i phoned my brother and told him i would not go to his wedding,the shit has hit the fan and i feel sick for not going but i cannot let my girl down.

have i done the wright thing?

Weddings are family affairs surely, with little kids running around like loons. At least they don't dad-dance or generally make drunken arses of themselves. Your brother sounds like a bit of a scumbag. Suppose you should compromise a bit though, seeing as how he's your brother. Why not tell him you'll go to his next wedding?

 

[Woodchip]

Don't mean to offend Brighton Rock, but your brother sounds like a complete prick!

Why is his missus not having his niece as a flower girl/bridesmaid? Sounds like him and his missus (to-be) need their heads banging together!!!

 

[Gary Stevens Neighbour]

Two brothers I know had the same problem... one got married and didnt want his 2 nieces to go. Not saying its a right decision as I love my niece and nephew to bits, but consider it is his day and you should respect his wishes.

Weddings are not always planned for everyone's personally enjoyment and liking, its for the couple's day. It is their special day and you should respect to some degree...

 

[Silver flying chariot]

brother invited me and my misses to his wedding but he does not want my 3 year old to girl to attend he want an adult only bash.
trouble is i am a big family man and i alway put my kid first and i phoned my brother and told him i would not go to his wedding,the shit has hit the fan and i feel sick for not going but i cannot let my girl down.

have i done the wright thing?

Does it clash with the play off final?

oh no silly me, I forgot about the weekends result!!!

 

[ali jenkins]

I think you have done the right thing, but i can also see his point of veiw if he doesn't want kids running round all night.

I think you should talk to him and find out why he doesn't want kids there and then make a decision.

Good Luck

 

[DJ Leon]

Well I disagree with most of you.

He doesn't want children at his wedding. I can understand why. It's his and his wife's day, they can do what they like. I think you should go, I doubt your little girl will mind.

Saying that, if I was getting married I couldn't ban children because I would want my neices there. Each to their own.

 

[FamilyGuy]

brother invited me and my misses to his wedding but he does not want my 3 year old to girl to attend he want an adult only bash.
trouble is i am a big family man and i alway put my kid first and i phoned my brother and told him i would not go to his wedding,the shit has hit the fan and i feel sick for not going but i cannot let my girl down.

have i done the wright thing?

I think that it's a perfectly valid option for anyone to choose to have a no-kids wedding. It's also a perfectly valid option for you to choose not to attend.

There is no obligation to invite "family" or anyone else to your own wedding and nobody has any right to insist that you do otherwise, or to encourage you to do so.

Act like Adults and encourage your brother and his wife-to-be to celebrate his wedding in whatever way he chooses to do. Respect his wishes, don't criticise him for doing so - and don't fall out over something so trivial.

If you choose not to go, then be adult and politely decline - wish him all the best and remember that he's your brother.

 

[WATFORD zero]

I think shropshire makes a good point that it may not be directed at your daughter specifically.

I would phone him and explain that i was upset he hadn't invited my kids but, if he wants an adult only wedding, i would still go and get a baysitter for my kids. (It really isn't likely to effect your daughter, only you and your brother).

Good luck whatever you decide is right for you


Oh and Up yours palarse pikey

 

[Tom Bombadil]

Surely weddings are about the wishes of the two people exchanging vows. It's their day not yours, can't you just leave your ego to one side and concentrate on helping your brother and his fiance have a great day.

 

[Man of Harveys]

What a load of self-righteous tosh on this thread: having been to a child-free wedding for the last first time last year, it was lovely: parents could chill out rather than sit there permanently besieged by kids as well as stay long into the evening. Plus the happy couple - who PAY for the whole thing - can invite a load more of the people they'd really like to have there, rather than mates plus kids. Nothing wrong at all with stipulating that.

 

[Ding Dong !]

Out of Order !!!!

I re-married last year and because the registry office ( Lyme Regis ) was on the small side we had to restrict numbers. We therefore decided that children (other than immediate family) could not attend. So my kids were there as were my brothers and a few others.

Our friends ( most with children ) were over the moon as they had an opportunity of a weekend away without their children.

 

[Les Biehn]

I do think it is odd he doesn't want his own neice there. You can understand people saying only kids from immediate family but not at all? Very strange.

 

[Parson Henry]

brother invited me and my misses to his wedding but he does not want my 3 year old to girl to attend he want an adult only bash.
trouble is i am a big family man and i alway put my kid first and i phoned my brother and told him i would not go to his wedding,the shit has hit the fan and i feel sick for not going but i cannot let my girl down.

have i done the wright thing?

Disagree. It is his day and his do. I doubt it is a personal vendata against children. There is a time and place for everything.

Myabe he wants a relaxing do without hordes of under 10s charging around everywhere. Maybe your family (wider family) is so large he cannot afford to included all the kids.

 

[Lokki 7]

It's his wedding FFS. He can do what he wants on his "special day". Take your head out of your own arse and cough up for a babysitter, it's not that hard, jeez.
Everyone is always me, me, me these days. He has made his decision (which I'm sure wasn't easy) so respect it. Hopefully he will never have another wedding day, help give him the day he wants.