What piece of furniture would you be?

[AmexRuislip]

In the tradition of @greginbrighton threads
What piece of furniture would you be and why?

I would be a grandfather clock, as I would be around for years and keep my dignity.


 God I must be bored

 

[Paul Reids Sock]

I would probably be that drawer that is in every house, either in the Kitchen or Lounge.

it's full of useless rubbish that has been stored as 'it may be useful one day'. Once a year or so you actually get to use some of the rubbish you have stored up

 

[Hillian1]

The Flatpack thing in my lounge that was made from shoddy materials and is now falling apart at the seams.

 

[spence]

Probably a headboard. I can be quite noisy at times.

 

[Danny-Boy]

ERNEST would be the CUCKOO CLOCK

 

[Gabbafella]

The infamous table with the wobbly leg because my sole purpose is to irritate people.

 

[Bevendean Hillbilly]

I'd be (bizarrely I know) Victoria Coren-Mitchell's bog seat or Connie Huqs bike saddle. I'd even put up with David Mitchell's and Charlie Brookers porridge. In the case of Huq I'd crawl naked through broken lightbulbs just to stick matchsticks in her shit.

 

[The Stout Yeoman]

A nymphomaniac's chair ...

 

[Easy 10]

In the case of Huq I'd crawl naked through broken lightbulbs just to stick matchsticks in her shit.

I didn't really think this thread would be worth opening. Delighted to be proved wrong.

 

[SIMMO SAYS]

A commode

 

[pasty]

In the tradition of @greginbrighton threads
What piece of furniture would you be and why?

I would be a grandfather clock, as I would be around for years and keep my dignity.


 God I must be bored

 

[Dick Swiveller]

I'd be (bizarrely I know) Victoria Coren-Mitchell's bog seat or Connie Huqs bike saddle. I'd even put up with David Mitchell's and Charlie Brookers porridge. In the case of Huq I'd crawl naked through broken lightbulbs just to stick matchsticks in her shit.

I don't know why I find it funny you have such an obsession about a lady but get her name wrong. But I do.

Konnie.

 

[AmexRuislip]

I didn't really think this thread would be worth opening. Delighted to be proved wrong.

Well I must say that I'm honoured to have your approval @Easy 10

 

[el punal]

A tallboy . . . and no smutty comments about pouffes.

 

[Worthingite]

I'd be (bizarrely I know) Victoria Coren-Mitchell's bog seat or Connie Huqs bike saddle. I'd even put up with David Mitchell's and Charlie Brookers porridge. In the case of Huq I'd crawl naked through broken lightbulbs just to stick matchsticks in her shit.

If you take Connie, I'll take Vicky. I would do horrific things to her.

 

[Titanic]

I would love to be the whiteboard in the boardroom at the Amex - I would erase any stupid ideas about charging for access to bars!

 

[Bevendean Hillbilly]

I don't know why I find it funny you have such an obsession about a lady but get her name wrong. But I do.

Konnie.

I pad spell check strikes again.

 

[Dick Swiveller]

I pad spell check strikes again.

You need a more discerning tablet that shares your taste in women then!

 

[gregbrighton]

I would be nice leather chair for anyone who would like to sit on me.

 

[DavePage]

love seat please