[Travel] What is the best, and worst, toilets you've ever visited in the UK?

[Mustafa II]

 

[Eeyore]

Not sure. I've got an Excel spreadsheet with all my ratings. I'm doing a tour.

I know what the weirdest thread Ive ever seen on NSC is now.

 

[Chicken Run]

Your mums

 

[Bodian]

Worst = Aldershot football ground (recreation ground) in the 1980s.

 

[The Clamp]

Brighton;

Caught short? M&S cafe toilets. Unsurpassed for cleanliness.


Shoreham;

Caught short?

Medical centre by the library. Individual, clean, well kept cubicles. Please do bear in mind if you are “coming in hot” that there are a few steps to navigate to get up to the health centre. Be careful with your stride.

Or

Shoreham Centre.
Not as swish but roomy and well kept. Great alternative.

 

[Poyningsgull]

We went to China in 1996 and India in 2005, enough said.

 

[Is it PotG?]

Thank God Stains had an 'outside' bog next to the away entrance a couple of years back.
Could have gone badly wrong.

 

[Commander]

Best: Hutong in the Shard.

Worst: I once had a shit at Selhurst Park. Genuinely.

 

[AlbionBro]

I don't have a favourite toilet, but having music and then a splash of Brut 33 from a chap in the corner would rank highly with me. The worst has to be the Vetch Field, tiny, dark, smelly, no running water or a place to dry your hands.

 

[dejavuatbtn]

Corner terrace at Spotland. Pee up against a 5 foot wall and watch the game.

 

[Frutos]

Roll on the start of the season FFS.

 

[clapham_gull]

Well, the worst I have ever seen was the old terraced Kop Anfield in the early 90s, followed by Selhurst.

I'd also have to give a mention to the infamous Bradley's Spanish in the West End. Years ago now, but it was third world.

On the subject of modern Spanish toilets (in Spain) they put us to shame. In the major cities and seaside resorts you could eat your dinner off them.

I stayed in a hotel a few years ago with one of those electronic Japanese efforts.

Remarkable.

If you've never tried one you have a number of settings like a modern washer dryer, each selectable from a touch screen tablet on the wall.

My ring has never been so clean, fresh and polished, even when asked to deal with a heavy soiled load.

 

[BN9 BHA]

I don't have a favourite toilet, but having music and then a splash of Brut 33 from a chap in the corner would rank highly with me. The worst has to be the Vetch Field, tiny, dark, smelly, no running water or a place to dry your hands.

Vetch Field is up there with one of the worst football ground toilets I’ve been in. I couldn’t believe how dark it was in there but when my eyes adjusted I could just make out a large Birmingham City crest drawn on the wall

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

Worst, Clock Tower circa 72. Shit and piss everywhere, and a resident lurching leering old paedopile ready to chase teenage boys into the hell hole cubicle, and grab their arse as they ran out.

Best, any number of posh hotels and conference centres around the world I have had the pleasure....Raffles Singapore?

 

[Baldseagull]

I also had a shit at Selhurst Park, I was in hospitality, which was a really nice portacabin, with a corridor adjoining to a portacabin toilet block. I raised a cheek to do the paperwork, and the seat came off, slid out from under my arse, and under the cubicle wall, and left me wedged in the rim of the toilet.

 

[Is it PotG?]

Roll on the start of the season FFS.

Come on, it beats all the politics drivel!

 

[clapham_gull]

Worst, Clock Tower circa 72. Shit and piss everywhere, and a resident lurching leering old paedopile ready to chase teenage boys into the hell hole cubicle, and grab their arse as they ran out.

Best, any number of posh hotels and conference centres around the world I have had the pleasure....Raffles Singapore?

I'm sorry, but I can point you to a mid range hotel in San Sebastian where your rectum will be treated like a visiting head of state.

 

[Paulie Gualtieri]

London taxi drivers refer to this public toilet in Westminster as the Iron Lung

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

I'm sorry, but I can point you to a mid range hotel in San Sebastian where your rectum will be treated like a visiting head of state.

Paraded in front a fawning crowd? No thanks

 

[wellquickwoody]

Antigallican pub near Charltons ground. Without exaggeration, ‘long wall’ type urinal, blocked and flooded, piss possibly two inches deep, but toilets still in use, left standing six feet plus back from the wall just peeing into the lake.