[Football] What is the best (and worst) line in football commentary you have ever witnessed?

[Mustafa II]

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

I'd love to be a mole on the wall in that dressing room.

 

[Beach Hut]

Motson Italy v Brazil Spain 1982 World Cup

When Zico did an amazing bit of skill "oh what a turn"

 

[Happy Exile]

"Koch goes in hard" caused much hilarity in my circle during a Leeds game, possibly the FA Cup one against Crawley

 

[Easy 10]

Bryon Butler:
"Maradona, turns like a little eel, he comes away from trouble, little squat man comes inside Butcher, leaves him for dead, outside Fenwick, leaves him for dead, and puts the ball away, and that is why Maradona is the greatest player in the world! "

I've always suspected that line of commentary was added post-match.

 

[Greg Bobkin]

"Not for me, Clive."

 

[sakooshi]

I've always suspected that line of commentary was added post-match.

No, it was done live on the radio.

 

[Easy 10]

No, it was done live on the radio.

OK, I have nothing to contradict that. It just sounded a bit contrived.

 

[Kosh]

I remember one cracker, when describing Les Ferdinand - the striker, then playing for England:

“His only weakness is his finishing…”



Wish I could remember who it was…

 

[Elbow750]

Maggie Thatcher can you hear me? Maggie Thatcher, Maggie Thatcher, your boys took a hell of a beating.!!

 

[sakooshi]

OK, I have nothing to contradict that. It just sounded a bit contrived.

In a way it is contrived to put radio commentary together with video footage. Perhaps that's what you picked up on, since we usually hear it together with the video, although it was originally broadcast on BBC radio, so it's going to be different from how TV commentary usually sounds.

 

[Bodian]

"The crowd goes mad, we go mad - Robbie Reinelt has made it Hereford 1 Brighton 1"

 

[SeagullinExile]

“John Barnes loves getting on the end of Peter Beardsley’s balls”

Brian Moore

 

[Baldseagull]

I liked Ally McCoist describing a missed shot at goal as "high, wide, and not so very handsome"

Bob Booker commentating on BBC Sussex and on the seagulls player loved his slang and made me smile with an "oooooh, he's hit the Holy Ghost!" amongst others

 

[Scappa]

 

[Brightonfan1983]

"The Albanians, they love a moustache!" - Jonathan Pearce (1990s)

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

Tommy: Is Ryan Giggs the new George Best?

Ron Manager: Is George Best the old Ryan Giggs? But Giggsy-Wiggsy. Precocious talent, isn't he? Mmm? Ooh, got it all, you know? Speed, acceleration, sweet left foot, all the tricks - the dummy, the drop of the shoulder, the shimmy, nutmeg, jiggery-pokery, hocus pocus, abracadabra, I wanna reach out and grab ya. Steve Miller Band? Spin Doctors? Ooh, very similar.

 

[Peacehaven Wild Kids]

The 30 minutes are almost up Swindon fans, but you’re not there yet

 

[Klaas]

Wasn't quite commentary but me and a friend still quote Andy Steggall saying, 'Awesome, great stuff!' At the end of some local football match.

 

[DavidRyder]

Years ago, it was ‘he was forced into an unforced error’, can’t recall any more detail than that!

 

[One Teddy Maybank]

Don’t know.

But I’ve often thought that famous Beckham free kick against Greece deserved a really poetic, and subsequently famous piece of commentary, and it didn’t get it at all.

I can’t remember the last time a modern commentator delivered a real cracker, they just aren’t as good. I’m not even sure it’s what they say, but it’s how they say it. I’m all for diversity and inclusion in literally every other industry, but in football commentary I need to hear an old, posh white man tell me what has just happened. And they don’t really get the gigs anymore.

Agree.
It’s almost they have a list of sound bites/quotes in front of them. I find the commentators these days quite irritating.

I did like it after we went 2-0 up against Liverpool when Brian Moore said
“Well, rub your eyes and look at that”…..