There is no mystery about women, Wilko, and I agree we do give out mixed signals. I think a description of "too nice" is on a par with someone describing a man as "sweet" - it usually means they don't fancy the man. Not all women are nice - they like to play one man off against another, but if they are like that they are really not worth bothering about. Its only in the initial stages that you need to be careful about being too keen - its good that you are thoughtful and kind so most women would be glad of your company.
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what do women want?
- Thread starter Braders
- Start date
Safeway
M0DERAT0R
Thing is, Wilko's GOT a bird!! What a CHARMER. 
Curious Orange
Punxsatawney Phil
Spicy said:
Being described as "sweet" is undoubtedly the worst way to be described, you always know you aren't on to a winner!!
Goring Gull
New member
Be yourself , be confident... Very true, that would also follow in the sense, in my experience anyway. Once you have a permanent girlfriend suddenly a load of other girls are intrested in you..Why? When your single couldn't score in a brothel so to speak.... How can women tell?
Stumpy Tim
Well-known member
Spicy said:
So assuming you have a bloke, is your man not "sweet"? You women are a confusing bunch. Don't forget that.
the best thing is be nice at the start and then gradually start to be urself so as not to scare her away! having something in common with them is also a help, the only thing i have a problem with is trying to to shut them up going on about how great arsenal and manure are!
Lush
Mods' Pet
"I'm a woman. We don't say what we want but we reserve the right to be pissed off if we don't get it.
That's what makes us so fascinating...and just a little bit scary."
From "Sliding Doors."
That's what makes us so fascinating...and just a little bit scary."
From "Sliding Doors."
London Irish
Well-known member
I'm losing the will to live reading all this. Is this NSC or an online version of the Tricia Show?
My advice to all lonely blokes out there is to campaign harder for Falmer. It's a scientific fact that more shaggable birds will turn up to a ultra-modern football stadium with world-class facilities than a barely-improvised clearing in the middle of Withdean nature reserve, I'm sure I read that in the council planning consultants report. Even Braders will cop off at Falmer, I guarentee it.
My advice to all lonely blokes out there is to campaign harder for Falmer. It's a scientific fact that more shaggable birds will turn up to a ultra-modern football stadium with world-class facilities than a barely-improvised clearing in the middle of Withdean nature reserve, I'm sure I read that in the council planning consultants report. Even Braders will cop off at Falmer, I guarentee it.
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albiongirl
Well-known member
Yorkie said:
I had to laugh Yorkie as my dad was a complete bastard and I never want to be treated like that!!!
Beach Hut
Brighton Bhuna Boy
Be honest with each other, respect each other, have the same goals, try never to argue - better to be in agreement and finally have a laugh and don't take life to seriously
It is difficult to meet people sometimes. I went to a woodwork class thinking it would full of hot young men - serious mistake it was full of butch women making wardrobes. I only got round to making the leg of a coffee table and then didn't go anymore.
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London Irish
Well-known member
Mr John Prescott,
Deputy Prime Minister
26 Whitehall
London
SW1A 2WH
February 11th 2004
With reference to:
THE APPLICATION FOR A COMMUNITY STADIUM AT FALMER
Dear John,
I know I've already written you on this subject at length this week but pressing new planning matters have since come to light that require your further attention.
It has emerged that there is a group of Albion fans in such a sad and tragic state that they have resorted to seeking advice on the opposite sex from a footy messageboard.
This appalling state of affairs futher underlines the overwhelming need for a lovely new community stadium at Falmer to drag all those fit birds out of Brighton's trendy coffee bars on a Saturday afternoon and down to a game, in the vague hope that these social inadequates might have a chance of getting off with one of them.
Vitally it will mean that North Stand Chat can stop having threads like this that resemble women's morning television and can get back to discussing proper footy matters, such as the disparity between Albion's home and away form, McGhee's preference for 4-3-3 over 4-4-2 and whether Roberts has a more pert bottom than Kuipers.
As you are aware, Planning Policy Guidance Note No14 issued by your department clearly states, I quote, "that development in an AONB may be allowed provided i) there are compelling reasons of national interest, ii) that all alternative locations have been exhausted, and iii) there exists a tragic local bunch of c**** who couldn't cop a feel after falling into a barrel load of tits," end quote.
Please be aware that these desperate men have had more "Dear John" letters from women in their lives than you have had from Albion fans over the past week.
While it is true they have had some flirtatious banter with the opposite sex on North Stand Chat, research has shown that these daft bints are unsuitable candidates for humping because they are: too young; too old; too married; too boyfriended; too scary; or are a 39-year-old truck driver from Croydon called Dave having a laugh with everyone.
Sheepcote Valley of course remains a totally inappropriate site for a community stadium, because I'm sure you can imagine the munters that this will drag in from nearby Whitehawk, I mean I know these guys are desperate, but COME ON.
I know it is said that flattery will never get you anywhere in winning a planning battle, but can I just say, Deputy Prime Minister, as a former merchant seasman I'm sure you never had any trouble pulling, and managed to get your leg over in every port of call! Please think of those terrible unfortunates without your legendary charisma, perfect diction and ruggedly handsome features.
Please approve the stadium at Falmer, the continuing struggle of these sad NSC twats to hold on to girlfriends has given pleasure to generations of Albion supporters. Please don't let the social lives of these unfortunate Albion fans die,
FALMER FOR ALL SOCIALLY ISOLATED BLOKES
Deputy Prime Minister
26 Whitehall
London
SW1A 2WH
February 11th 2004
With reference to:
THE APPLICATION FOR A COMMUNITY STADIUM AT FALMER
Dear John,
I know I've already written you on this subject at length this week but pressing new planning matters have since come to light that require your further attention.
It has emerged that there is a group of Albion fans in such a sad and tragic state that they have resorted to seeking advice on the opposite sex from a footy messageboard.
This appalling state of affairs futher underlines the overwhelming need for a lovely new community stadium at Falmer to drag all those fit birds out of Brighton's trendy coffee bars on a Saturday afternoon and down to a game, in the vague hope that these social inadequates might have a chance of getting off with one of them.
Vitally it will mean that North Stand Chat can stop having threads like this that resemble women's morning television and can get back to discussing proper footy matters, such as the disparity between Albion's home and away form, McGhee's preference for 4-3-3 over 4-4-2 and whether Roberts has a more pert bottom than Kuipers.
As you are aware, Planning Policy Guidance Note No14 issued by your department clearly states, I quote, "that development in an AONB may be allowed provided i) there are compelling reasons of national interest, ii) that all alternative locations have been exhausted, and iii) there exists a tragic local bunch of c**** who couldn't cop a feel after falling into a barrel load of tits," end quote.
Please be aware that these desperate men have had more "Dear John" letters from women in their lives than you have had from Albion fans over the past week.
While it is true they have had some flirtatious banter with the opposite sex on North Stand Chat, research has shown that these daft bints are unsuitable candidates for humping because they are: too young; too old; too married; too boyfriended; too scary; or are a 39-year-old truck driver from Croydon called Dave having a laugh with everyone.
Sheepcote Valley of course remains a totally inappropriate site for a community stadium, because I'm sure you can imagine the munters that this will drag in from nearby Whitehawk, I mean I know these guys are desperate, but COME ON.
I know it is said that flattery will never get you anywhere in winning a planning battle, but can I just say, Deputy Prime Minister, as a former merchant seasman I'm sure you never had any trouble pulling, and managed to get your leg over in every port of call! Please think of those terrible unfortunates without your legendary charisma, perfect diction and ruggedly handsome features.
Please approve the stadium at Falmer, the continuing struggle of these sad NSC twats to hold on to girlfriends has given pleasure to generations of Albion supporters. Please don't let the social lives of these unfortunate Albion fans die,
FALMER FOR ALL SOCIALLY ISOLATED BLOKES
NMH
Banned
Freud's dying last words were "what do women want?"
Well who cares what they want? You are a bloke, so it's about what man wants, not the trivial guff and soap-opera lifestyle - that is 'for the birds'.
Never mind what they want. Forget what women WANT completely lads, because even if you give them exactly what they want, they still won't give a shit and then will become 'spoilt' and self-absorbed in the concept that you will do 'whatever they want' ! You'll die young pandering to some precious prima-donna who will put you on a hamster-wheel if you give her a chance while she preens and does her nails in case Sir Gallahad comes riding up to sweep her off her feet.
Now, about what they jump through hoops for;
Men who don't need them at all, are blase' and could care less if they like him or not.
Men who already have a woman in the wings. Women like to screw two people at the same time - the 'other woman' being part of that equation. They will readily become that 'other woman' for a cad who cheats and lies. They throw themselves at some pratt with an awful personality and half a brain - just because he's making the most off any chances to pull.
The smell of money - they won't require that you are generous, as long as they think you have it.
Confidence - even tinged with narcissism and arrogance. They love a bloke who is cocky.
Challenge. Don't agree with every word. Tell her what to think, and never do vice versa. Take command, they NEVER go for a bloke who can't lead the way, and think it's a wimp that says "oh I don't know what to do tonight, what do you want to do?"
Comedy. A sense of humour is absolutely required. Even if you are obnoxious, use bad language, or make fun of her. Better to make fun of her, it completely confuses her and confounds her reading of how to dominate or use power over you.
If you want to be a 'player', take advantage of your cards played - if you like a bird, don't be nervous to get to her best friend first. They hate it when we tell our mates - but they talk like a gossip column to everyone they know! Hypocritical bitches yes, so get among them and dog them around if you want to succeed on a regular basis.
As long as you diffuse her powers, you are gaining some of your own with her. *Nice guys finish last* - aka not at all. Don't be 'too nice", you get no points while someone who is a bastard to them gets full marks and his name enscribed on the toilet door. (better to sneak into the ladies and put it there yourself; "so and so is a bastard"!)
Don't issue ultimatums. Some blokes do it right from the off - and given a choice of taking or leaving....will leave. Make the choice sublime. Don't be easy to pin down either - and if she takes a stroll - even just to the toilet - don't always wait in the same spot like a puppy on a leash for her return. Be gregarious, keep your own options open.
Don't hold out for that 'special woman' while there are chances to have fun with a semi-attractive lass to pass the time with company. You pull a couple of those and very soon your phone-book is full of new numbers, and you can weed out the roughest ones as you choose, moving onto the higher ranking beauties with surprising speed.
Trust NMH
p.s. women will revel in the concept that they are fascinatingly complex creatures, that we men are constantly working hard to decypher them. Sod that, most of them are dumb as rocks and think about peurile and trivial shite...... and it's not their mind we're after anyway!
Well who cares what they want? You are a bloke, so it's about what man wants, not the trivial guff and soap-opera lifestyle - that is 'for the birds'.
Never mind what they want. Forget what women WANT completely lads, because even if you give them exactly what they want, they still won't give a shit and then will become 'spoilt' and self-absorbed in the concept that you will do 'whatever they want' ! You'll die young pandering to some precious prima-donna who will put you on a hamster-wheel if you give her a chance while she preens and does her nails in case Sir Gallahad comes riding up to sweep her off her feet.
Now, about what they jump through hoops for;
Men who don't need them at all, are blase' and could care less if they like him or not.
Men who already have a woman in the wings. Women like to screw two people at the same time - the 'other woman' being part of that equation. They will readily become that 'other woman' for a cad who cheats and lies. They throw themselves at some pratt with an awful personality and half a brain - just because he's making the most off any chances to pull.
The smell of money - they won't require that you are generous, as long as they think you have it.
Confidence - even tinged with narcissism and arrogance. They love a bloke who is cocky.
Challenge. Don't agree with every word. Tell her what to think, and never do vice versa. Take command, they NEVER go for a bloke who can't lead the way, and think it's a wimp that says "oh I don't know what to do tonight, what do you want to do?"
Comedy. A sense of humour is absolutely required. Even if you are obnoxious, use bad language, or make fun of her. Better to make fun of her, it completely confuses her and confounds her reading of how to dominate or use power over you.
If you want to be a 'player', take advantage of your cards played - if you like a bird, don't be nervous to get to her best friend first. They hate it when we tell our mates - but they talk like a gossip column to everyone they know! Hypocritical bitches yes, so get among them and dog them around if you want to succeed on a regular basis.
As long as you diffuse her powers, you are gaining some of your own with her. *Nice guys finish last* - aka not at all. Don't be 'too nice", you get no points while someone who is a bastard to them gets full marks and his name enscribed on the toilet door. (better to sneak into the ladies and put it there yourself; "so and so is a bastard"!)
Don't issue ultimatums. Some blokes do it right from the off - and given a choice of taking or leaving....will leave. Make the choice sublime. Don't be easy to pin down either - and if she takes a stroll - even just to the toilet - don't always wait in the same spot like a puppy on a leash for her return. Be gregarious, keep your own options open.
Don't hold out for that 'special woman' while there are chances to have fun with a semi-attractive lass to pass the time with company. You pull a couple of those and very soon your phone-book is full of new numbers, and you can weed out the roughest ones as you choose, moving onto the higher ranking beauties with surprising speed.
Trust NMH
p.s. women will revel in the concept that they are fascinatingly complex creatures, that we men are constantly working hard to decypher them. Sod that, most of them are dumb as rocks and think about peurile and trivial shite...... and it's not their mind we're after anyway!
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Lush
Mods' Pet
London Irish said:
Meade's Ball
Well-known member
I'm ever-so-slightly odd. And i tend not to be on the lookout for women. This leads me into a series of ludicrous encounters with females who seem to be rather unstable. I receive diatribes called <Meade's Ball's> Faults written carefully (you can still admire the penmanship of your death warrant) on 4 sides of A4 paper. I get described as the embodiment of male evil.
So, perhaps stay away from being odd or artistic. Like things. Seem positive. Enthuse.
So, perhaps stay away from being odd or artistic. Like things. Seem positive. Enthuse.
BrightonBird
New member
I WANT FALMER 
:falmerspi :falmerspi :falmerspi 
:falmerspi :falmerspi :falmerspi 
NMH said:
deary me - you must have met a few shockers in your time??
