[Football] Tyrone Mings Quick Out Of The Traps......

[The Clamp]

The bile being heaped on THPP, for simply openly expressing what many are probably thinking, is ridiculous.

“The thief believes everyone steals”.

I assure you not many people are thinking that the solution to the MH issues of a 24 year old survivor of sexual abuse who lives a hugely pressured life in the public eye is to “switch off Twitter”.

 

[Springal]

.

It is still OK to "believe" that some sports stars are full of sh1t rather than suffering mental health problems, even if they are.

It’s not really though is it ?

 

[Thunder Bolt]

Thank you for this post TB. An almost identical situation to my own. Only difference being that I can't actually afford to be signed off for 5 weeks - even if I need it.

Please try to find people to talk to. Talking helps massively.

 

[Thunder Bolt]

My dad died shortly before Christmas last year. It was non Covid related but owing to Covid restrictions I couldn’t visit him in hospital. Then because of Covid rules we could only have 15 people at his funeral and no wake afterwards to mark his passing, remember the good times and console each other. So after the cremation I just got in my car and drove the 150 mile home on my own.

So I don’t feel like I have mourned him yet. It doesn’t even feel like he’s died. He deserved so much more by way of a funeral. I can’t change any of that now and I’m still waiting for it to hit me, so to speak,

By way of giving him a decent legacy I just try each day to be a better dad myself than perhaps I was previously. If my kids ask to play football with me, or do something or just want some of my time I just say ‘yes’ now where previously I might have said I’m busy or tired. I guess my dad dying like that suddenly made me realise that the most valuable thing we have is time.

Sorry if that sounds a bit shite and sentimental; I’ll revert to my usual throw-away comments now.

It’s not shite nor sentimental. My husband had very similar in November/December although he had me with him. I know he hasn’t really mourned losing his Mum yet. Like you he couldn’t visit her whilst she was dying & drove up to Rotherham for her funeral and straight back home again.
I try to get him to talk about her, laughing at daft things she did, or the kind things she did for others. Please talk to someone, a relative or friend who knew your Dad, just to help accept his passing.

My sister in law is organising a get together in October, for family so we can have a delayed wake.

 

[mejonaNO12 aka riskit]

The bile being heaped on THPP, for simply openly expressing what many are probably thinking, is ridiculous.

"Like Biles, maybe the simple solution is just to switch off your twitter feed?"

If many people agree with the above then that doesn't make it any less stupid.

Lots of people do stupid things sometimes.

 

[razer]

It’s not really though is it ?

Yes it is.

Does a subject matter now automatically become a no go area for negative thought when it includes a reference to mental health?

I don't believe so and before you (or somebody else) ask, yes I do have first hand experience of mental health issues within my immediate family.

 

[Springal]

Yes it is.

Does a subject matter now automatically become a no go area for negative thought when it includes a reference to mental health?

I don't believe so and before you (or somebody else) ask, yes I do have first hand experience of mental health issues within my immediate family.

But why? Why does everything have to be questioned ? Do we not take anyone’s word at face value?

What does Mings have to gain by releasing this today? Is he saying he can’t play, not training, will miss the start of the season? Or just highlighting what has happened to him?

 

[mejonaNO12 aka riskit]

Yes it is.

Does a subject matter now automatically become a no go area for negative thought when it includes a reference to mental health?

I don't believe so and before you (or somebody else) ask, yes I do have first hand experience of mental health issues within my immediate family.

Did they switch off their social media to sort it out as per THPP's advice?

 

[razer]

Did they switch off their social media to sort it out as per THPP's advice?

Yes. She is now no longer anorexic, is happily married and has three delightful kids. And all because her dad persuaded her to dump Facebook.

Simple advice like THPP's works sometimes.

Probably much to the astonishment of those that get on someone's case simply because they may question a subject that they think they shouldn't.

 

[The Clamp]

Yes it is.

Does a subject matter now automatically become a no go area for negative thought when it includes a reference to mental health?

I don't believe so and before you (or somebody else) ask, yes I do have first hand experience of mental health issues within my immediate family.

You can say whatever is on your mind, of course. But when a person, famous or not, that you (the collective "you") have never met or spoken to discloses that they have experienced mental health issues and you say you don't believe them, you're likely to get a bit of resistance. Because it's an unfounded, unprofessional point of view based on your subjective opinion.

Also, I'm genuinely not sure what you mean when you write:

"Does a subject matter now automatically become a no go area for negative thought when it includes a reference to mental health"?

What subject matter? Do you mean is it a no-go area to accuse someone who talks about their MH issues of being a liar?
Well, I certainly don't think it's our place to call someone a liar for disclosing mental health issues. I'm not sure that makes it "no-go", it's just common sense and respectful to the person who has made themselves vulnerable by discussing it.

For what it's worth, I don't think many people would jeopardise a career or sink their chances of Olympic gold by falsely claiming MH issues. And if they did, then they probably have MH issues.

 

[The Clamp]

Yes. She is now no longer anorexic, is happily married and has three delightful kids. And all because her dad persuaded her to dump Facebook.

Simple advice like THPP's works sometimes.

Probably much to the astonishment of those that get on someone's case simply because they may question a subject that they think they shouldn't.

No doubt social media can greatly exacerbate disorders such as anorexia. And eschewing them can be a great aid to healing. However, I am going to go out on a limb and say it is very unlikely that the act of ditching FB resolved her issues on it's own. I'm gonna take a THPP stance and declare that I don't believe that was the sole cure. Having said that, mental health is a complex and very personal thing so I can't rule it out.
In my professional experience I would say it was unlikely but I couldn't rule it out.

 

[razer]

No doubt social media can greatly exacerbate disorders such as anorexia. And eschewing them can be a great aid to healing. However, I am going to go out on a limb and say it is very unlikely that the act of ditching FB resolved her issues on it's own. I'm gonna take a THPP stance and declare that I don't believe that was the sole cure.

That's akin to saying "only the true Messiah denies his divinity".

I obviously wouldn't have expected you and many others to believe such an unlikely outcome of simply ditching social media. It doesn't fit the correct agenda does it?

 

[Weststander]

That's akin to saying "only the true Messiah denies his divinity".

I obviously wouldn't have expected you and many others to believe such an unlikely outcome of simply ditching social media. It doesn't fit the correct agenda does it?

Without downplaying mental illness in the slightest, ditching social media for some people might help.

In the recent doc about Caroline Flack largely consisting of interviews with her loved ones, they spoke about her addiction to reading what people said about her online including the hatred/trolling/bitching. She knew it was adversely affecting her mental state, but she just couldn’t resist.

(Obviously mental illness was prevalent long before the internet, but just a practical point in this age).

 

[The Clamp]

That's akin to saying "only the true Messiah denies his divinity".

I obviously wouldn't have expected you and many others to believe such an unlikely outcome of simply ditching social media. It doesn't fit the correct agenda does it?

I have no agenda. I’m talking purely from professional experience. We have had quite a few anorexics in our care and it usually takes a multi agency approach to recovery. One single thing would be unlikely to lead someone to recovery from something as complex as an eating disorder. Expunging social media from one’s mental landscape could certainly be a help. And I’d hesitate to rule anything out totally. However no, I don’t believe that alone would lead to full recovery.

But no agenda here, no bad feelings or intentions, just an opinion based on my experience.

 

[Sheebo]

I suffer from anxiety - wakes me up at 3am most mornings. I'm just coming to the end of a two week sign off from work due to depression. I assume you probably think I need to man up and stop my "crybaby [sic] fake virtue signalling" ? Really, pack it in - you clearly know eff all about mental illness and how it affects EVERYONE .... regardless of wealth.

Sorry to hear that mate - get well soon and keep talking…

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

... in this post-Biles era.

'Mental Health' set to replace VAR as the EPL issue of the upcoming season.

Didn't it used to be called what it was? IE the pressure that naturally comes with having to perform at the level of 'elite' sport that pays your million quid wage?

Like Biles, maybe the simple solution is just to switch off your twitter feed?

Too Old School for me. I'm out

 

[BadFish]

It was never going to be simple tho eh? Doesn't necessarily mean those people who earn millions in the process should be always treated as walking on eggshells. Else where does high- pressure highly-paid 'elite' sport begin and end?

This question is probably best answered by medical professionals who work with and interact with said players.

Anyone else is really just judging people without having a clue what they are taking about.



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[Harry Wilson's tackle]

The early morning attacks are scary.

I'm so lucky with my employer. They were good with me when anxiety issues returned. The reason I don't have a season ticket at the AMEX anymore is because of panic attacks- and that's before the team start letting leads go..

I envy folk for whom it's not a problem. But until they are stuck in the middle of Bruges one afternoon, and experience feelings of absolute dread, akin to the symptoms of a heart attack, and all this lasts for three hours during which you are found cowering in the corner of a cafe, they will never know.

I used to travel the length and breadth of this country and now I barely leave the area. I have been abroad once in the last 15 years with the help of copious amounts of sedative. I wish I could be 'normal'.

The trigger, a parent's death in 2008. Up until then I didn't know what anxiety was. I kept it quiet until one night I had the worst attack imaginable until I was so desperate I put it in my Facebook feed. A 'coming out' or so to speak. Even then I tried to not be too much bother and not make it too 'look at me' for fear of being seen as an attention seeker. Thankfully a lot of folk, including [MENTION=616]Guinness Boy[/MENTION] , just posted nice messages and it eased off. But you don't forget stuff.

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I will admit I get afraid sometimes because I worry that if paranoia was replaced by an actual devastating event that it could send me over the edge. You just don't know this stuff. It's been mild for a while and I hope it stays that way.

I've had the confidence, although in a reserved way, to tell folk around me that I am a bit odd and to let me be so and not worry. It's more of a compromise as I don't want sympathy just a reaction that doesn't make things worse. I had to leave a match at Chelsea after twenty minutes (probably for the best that time...) because my body was like jelly and my pulse rate twice what it should be.

So, yes, seeing a thread like this makes my stomach churn, so I'll throw my story at it and hope that others don't go back into their shell. I'm sure there will be a few folk who buy the badge to attention seek. But that's always going to be the case. Most folk are genuine, and Tyrone Mings has been dealing with stuff for ages. It's those who hurl abuse who are the issue. And if someone thinks it's the other way round then just look at folk who don't have the public profile. How much someone earns is not the issue.

The reason why it seems so common now is because folk ARE opening up. And seeing people concentrate on a few here and there who might take the piss is dangerous. I'm glad I let it all out a while ago because seeing a thread like this started would have sent me back into my shell again.

And before I leave this room, thank you for posting that. I think the OP needs to give his head a wobble. He's not shy at coming forward when he wants to teach me a lesson but I think I'll leave it there, and hope he has time for some quiet reflection. Best wishes to you

 

[BadFish]

Personally I hope that this season does have a mental health theme. Let's get this shit out in the open, of players and others in football male it easier for the rest of us to talk about it then where is the downside.

The OP might even learn a thing or two.

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[Eeyore]

It isn’t mockery or social media pressure causing the mental issues.

Simone Biles suffered from twisties, trying to complete a 2.5 somersault. A twistie is not knowing exactly where you are in the air, so as to complete the move safely, ie a mental block.

You don’t understand it, because you’ve never experienced it, but feel qualified to mock it on social media, whilst blaming social media for their problems.

It happened to me in cricket. We call it the Yips. It occurred in a match in May 1998. I remember the day. I have only bowled an handful of overs since. I may try to bowl a couple of overs in a game every two or three years. It's pointless and I only do it when there is nothing on the game because I can barely land the ball.

Up until that point I had been the most successful bowler in the club that decade. But I ran in and lost my release on the ball and it landed in front of me. That was it, gone.

I've never worked it out. When I try to bowl the ball my brain goes to mush and all I can think of is the point of release. A part of my brain that wasn't in play before suddenly starts interfering. I did some research and found out that some cricket careers have been ruined by it. So the same would apply in other sports.

I just don't get why some folk issue judgements without thinking or asking questions. I don't get asked anymore why I don't bowl in games and I know some folk are just bemused by it. But thankfully I wasn't a professional so I could slip away without Twitter setting its diseased primates on me.