[Help] Tom'll Fix It

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

I'm still waiting. This really is preposterously bad service.

The service you require is no longer available - please see post #65

 

[pearl]

Thank you for your queries, which are invaluable to us. Unfortunately, since checking my inbox this morning, I have received a message from Camelot. Apparently I have won £105m. So there is good news and there is bad news.

The good news is that funds are being made available to Tony Bloom to purchase Ashley Barnes in the January transfer window. £105m should just about cover it.

The bad news is that NSC user [MENTION=17913]Falmerfourtickets[/MENTION] has agreed to take over this invaluable advice service due to having large amounts of unexpected free time available. Please contact [MENTION=17913]Falmerfourtickets[/MENTION] by PM, or write to him direct at:

TIM'LL FIX IT
CONSERVATIVE PARTY HQ
WITHDEAN

Thank you and goodbye

Dear Tom
I wish to draw your attention to a cause close to my heart .....The Blessed Sisters of Albatoss Leaking Monastery Roof Fund.
These sisters spend every waking hour praying for the souls of wretched sinners, just like you Tom.
I am trying to raise enough cash to get their roof fixed and take them on a much needed retreat to sunny Barbados .
Of course their beliefs do not allow bank accounts so if you could transfer your generous donation to my account it can rest there until the target is reached.
Thank you in advance
Pearl

 

[Dick Head]

�� Acme Ombudsman Inc. ��

Formal Complaint​

Dear Tom,

I am writing to make a formal complaint against you on behalf of my client, Mr. Dick Head. His complaint is that you failed to provide him with satisfaction when he was charged for the free service 'Tom'll Fix It' on Tuesday November 26th 2019.

I am seeking compensation of £105m in loss of earnings and damages because of the stress, depression and anxiety caused to my client which has meant that he will never be able to work ever again.

You are legally required to respond formally to this complaint and I shall follow up this letter if I do not hear back from you.

I look forward to hearing from you in the very near future.

Yours sincerely,

Paul Goodman.

 

[AmexRuislip]

Dearest Tom

Were are travelling down to Sussex this weekend,
How does one avoid the M25 with all those lower class types that keep cutting me up.
Its outrageous, how these people are allowed to drive these days.

Yours sincerely

A concerned ROSPA driver

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

�� Acme Ombudsman Inc. ��

Formal Complaint​

Dear Tom,

I am writing to make a formal complaint against you on behalf of my client, Mr. Dick Head. His complaint is that you failed to provide him with satisfaction when he was charged for the free service 'Tom'll Fix It' on Tuesday November 26th 2019.

I am seeking compensation of £105m in loss of earnings and damages because of the stress, depression and anxiety caused to my client which has meant that he will never be able to work ever again.

You are legally required to respond formally to this complaint and I shall follow up this letter if I do not hear back from you.

I look forward to hearing from you in the very near future.

Yours sincerely,

Paul Goodman.

 

[AmexRuislip]

View attachment 117599

Don't start all that sh!te Tom Hark, we all know you live in Preston Park!!!

 

[Saladpack Seagull]

What a great thread this has been! Cheered me up no end! Of course if Tom loses the damages case he will still be in Preston Park but from then on occupying one of the benches.

 

[half time scores]

Dear Tom
I have a problem with the radiator in my bedroom.
Keep this to yourself, but I know it listens to everything that goes on in the said room.
Who does it report to?
What would be the best action plan?
Yours sincerely
HTS

 

[marlowe]

Having trouble with your central heating? Boiler packed up? Electrical appliance not applying itself?

Post your technical mechanical queries here, for prompt invaluable advice

You will not be charged for this service.

I had to smile today. I had to take my car to our mechanics as it was over heating.
While one of the mechanics (who happens to be called Tom) was assessing the problem his business partner's wife joined us and started chatting and with reference to the problem with our car uttered the words, "Tom'll fix it".