To avoid bed wetting - the staying up tracker 36 - level - WE ARE STAYING UP

[Giraffe]

See below. An easy ready to use "we are staying up" tracker.

In short we all know we are going to get hammered by the big teams, we therefore have to look at those as "just for fun".

Basically to stay up we need 40 points (probably less, but bare with it).

The easiest way is to beat all of the worst ten teams from last year at home and draw with them away.

If we do that we will have 40 points. I am including Newcastle and Huddersfield in the bottom 10 by the way.

If you lose all of the others you end up with the following results.

Bedwetting on NSC as we only get 9 points from our first 10 games.
Talk of Europe when we hit 23 points in mid December.
Talk of relegation gain by the end of January.
Then NSC goes crazy after we reach 38 point with five matches to go
NSC bedwets again as we take just 2 points from the final five matches, players on the beach, not trying etc etc etc etc etc.

As long as are close or ahead of this tracker, it will have been have a good season. Enjoy!!

 

[Bozza]

Great work. Can you factor in a surprise win against one of the big guns at some point though please?

 

[Normal Rob]

Simple. Effective. Genius.

 

[The_Viper]

SPOILERS









We're going to win our opener.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

See below. An easy ready to use "we are staying up" tracker.

In short we all know we are going to get hammered by the big teams, we therefore have to look at those as "just for fun".

Basically to stay up we need 40 points (probably less, but bare with it).

The easiest way is to beat all of the worst ten teams from last year at home and draw with them away.

If we do that we will have 40 points. I am including Newcastle and Huddersfield in the bottom 10 by the way.

If you lose all of the others you end up with the following results.

Bedwetting on NSC as we only get 9 points from our first 10 games.
Talk of Europe when we hit 23 points in mid December.
Talk of relegation gain by the end of January.
Then NSC goes crazy after we reach 38 point with five matches to go
NSC bedwets again as we take just 2 points from the final five matches, players on the beach, not trying etc etc etc etc etc.

As long as are close or ahead of this tracker, it will have been have a good season. Enjoy!!

Can you please add an extra column, ready for the ACTUAL cumulative total, for quick and easy reference through the season, so we know whether to be WETTING or not.

 

[Giraffe]

Great work. Can you factor in a surprise win against one of the big guns at some point though please?

Nope, that needs to be a genuine bonus to make up for our likely failure to beat Stoke and West Brom at home.

Simple. Effective. Genius.

Too kind

Can you please add an extra column, ready for the ACTUAL cumulative total, for quick and easy reference through the season, so we know whether to be WETTING or not.

For sure, will do once we get going. I may even throw in a graph or two just for you. We don't want to be below the bedwetting waterline.

 

[LlcoolJ]

Brilliant.

And as an aside, I need a lie down just looking at the fixtures. It's still not really sunk in......

 

[hans kraay fan club]

For sure, will do once we get going. I may even throw in a graph or two just for you. We don't want to be below the bedwetting waterline.

Perfect.

Perhaps a little RULE applied to the 'actual' column, too, so that the cells fill RED when we're behind the required 'run rate'.

 

[Seagull1989]

No away win all season? You heard it hear first , don't bother getting tickets anyone

 

[Insel affe]

See below. An easy ready to use "we are staying up" tracker.

In short we all know we are going to get hammered by the big teams, we therefore have to look at those as "just for fun".

Basically to stay up we need 40 points (probably less, but bare with it).

The easiest way is to beat all of the worst ten teams from last year at home and draw with them away.

If we do that we will have 40 points. I am including Newcastle and Huddersfield in the bottom 10 by the way.

If you lose all of the others you end up with the following results.

Bedwetting on NSC as we only get 9 points from our first 10 games.
Talk of Europe when we hit 23 points in mid December.
Talk of relegation gain by the end of January.
Then NSC goes crazy after we reach 38 point with five matches to go
NSC bedwets again as we take just 2 points from the final five matches, players on the beach, not trying etc etc etc etc etc.

As long as are close or ahead of this tracker, it will have been have a good season. Enjoy!!

Love it, this should be bounced at the end of season.

 

[burnee54]

Where's the excel file?

 

[Bozza]

Love it, this should be bounced at the end of season.

I think you're underestimating [MENTION=3734]Giraffe[/MENTION] somewhat if you don't think this will be bounced at least 37 times before that.

 

[Notters]

Seriously doubt we won't get an away win somewhere along the line.

 

[Giraffe]

I think you're underestimating [MENTION=3734]Giraffe[/MENTION] somewhat if you don't think this will be bounced at least 37 times before that.

Ouch. But perfectly true

 

[Bozza]

Seriously doubt we won't get an away win somewhere along the line.

Did Burnley get one in the end last season?

 

[Bozza]

Ouch. But perfectly true

It was a compliment as to your thoroughness.

 

[Giraffe]

Seriously doubt we won't get an away win somewhere along the line.

Did you see us play away at all last season? The wins we got were narrow and sometimes lucky against much lesser opposition than we will be playing soon.

I'd like to think one will come at Selhurst though.

 

[moggy]

Is that right? No Sunday games till last game of the season when everyone plays on Sunday?

 

[Official Old Man]

Strange, but looking at the teams listed like that doesn't look so bad. The occasional Arsenal, Man Utd, Chelsea but most of the teams are no less mid table hangers on than we are.

 

[Bozza]

Is that right? No Sunday games till last game of the season when everyone plays on Sunday?

Not until Sky and BT get to grips with us. We're guaranteed at least one.