[Misc] Things your parents said that surprised you

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

This is a problem easily solved... no ITV = no Ant & Dec.

It's a policy that solves many, many other similar problems too

Not wishing to derail the thread but I occasionally watch ITV because football is on. Christ, what a culture shock. Phone this number and be charged a quid plus local rates to decide which of the following players scored the most exciting goals for England in the Euros:

A David Beckham
B Chrissy Ronaldo
c Chrissy Waddle

Then adverts for things like Iceland, and The Sun.

Back on thread topic:

"Upset? Making myself upset? A man's not going to make himself upset! It's sitting here, listening to you buggers!"

Not the most extraordinary thing the old man said, but one example. I remeber it because I had it on a cassette tape. He started one of his rants and I decided to capture it for posterity.

Tragically I am only a smidgeon less bonkers :facepalm

 

[Lindfield by the Pond]

M & D visited a buffet restaurant in Ontario called Mother Tuckers Food Experience years ago. Whilst recounting the trip at a Dinner Party with some esteemed guests, and plenty of booze, when back in the UK, Mum described it as Mother *uckers Tood Experience. Surprised a few.

 

[Weststander]

Surprisingly, my Dad told one of my brothers not that far back, that he regretted his parenting of me when I was in my teens/early 20’s.

I wasn’t big trouble for him at all, I shone academically (no thanks to them, they had negligible interest).

But being an aggressive control freak with a temper, he simply didn’t like someone else having a differing opinion on things or having teenage moods. In hindsight, I realise he didn’t like me at that time.

The penny dropped for him when he saw how we’d reacted the other way and were far better parents with our kids.

 

[lawros left foot]

I was round my Mum’s fairly recently and something about HMS Hood came on the telly. As we were watching she said “ My cousin died on the Hood”
I asked her his name , as , to be honest, she’s 90 and sometimes gets a bit confused now, anyway, she told me his name, and that he lived in Dover. I looked it up when I got home and sure enough, there he was.
The suprising thing was , he was a cook, and I had spent 15 years in the RN as a cook.She had never mentioned him before.

Another thing she came out with recently is that her father was born in the cottages ( ex Coastguard cottages) at Cuckmere Haven. We had been there many times as a family and she’d never mentioned that, either.

 

[zefarelly]

When I was sixteen in the early seventies(very early seventies) my father said to me"This country has had it boy piss off abroad. That is the only advice he ever gave me.

He was spot on.

 

[zefarelly]

I was round my Mum’s fairly recently and something about HMS Hood came on the telly. As we were watching she said “ My cousin died on the Hood”
I asked her his name , as , to be honest, she’s 90 and sometimes gets a bit confused now, anyway, she told me his name, and that he lived in Dover. I looked it up when I got home and sure enough, there he was.
The suprising thing was , he was a cook, and I had spent 15 years in the RN as a cook.She had never mentioned him before.

Another thing she came out with recently is that her father was born in the cottages ( ex Coastguard cottages) at Cuckmere Haven. We had been there many times as a family and she’d never mentioned that, either.

Older generations don't talk, or tell unless prompted, sometimes forced . . . . My Dad ****ed off when I was 6 . . . . Saw him every other Sunday, just enough to not forget but never enough to forge anything. By the time I was 12 I'd given up. It wasnt until my step dads best mate told me, in my late teens, he was good mates with my Dad, they went to college together and he's a good guy, you should make the effort. . .I did and it was worth it. He died in his mid 50's, I was 33. Sorry, diverged, never got any advice.

EDIT- Dad never got any advice. His old mand was gone and a total **** by all accounts . . .Well, my Nans. Dad got marched off to boarding school

My step Dad on the other hand, extremely well travelled in the 1970's, a lap of the Med. . . . Over 4 years , After boot camp and Army, inc 3-4 years in NI 68-72 . . . . Amongst other comments on travels ' Never trust an Arab'

I think it was a bit tongue in cheek, in my limited personal experience of dealing with them in business, he's got a valid point.

 

[Papak]

When I was sixteen in the early seventies(very early seventies) my father said to me"This country has had it boy piss off abroad. That is the only advice he ever gave me.

It looks like you got as far as Newhaven! Where did you start?

 

[zefarelly]

I got the drugs lecture from my mum /step dad when I was 16, I think I was smoking roll ups by then, and drinking a bit, not sure I'd really smoked any dope by then . . . . Anyway, got the lecture, detailed explanations actually . . . . My step Dad went on about 'Charles' and my mum piped up with 'If you get some good COke, its fantastic, but don't make a habit of it' I laughed, excitedly!!!

To her credit she then stated I know you'll try things and experiment but be careful, and made a massive issue about the fact we should never touch opiates.

 

[Rinkmaster]

It looks like you got as far as Newhaven! Where did you start?

Hitchin really have travelled the world

 

[phoenix]

Doctor to my Mum. Are you constipated ? she replied "no church of England!" ffs .

 

[studio150]

My father never talked about his career in the Royal Marines apart from one sentence. During the Falklands War while watching the news together there was an interview with one of the top Royal Marine commanders, and he just said 'I trained him' and that was it. No other comment whatsoever about his 25 year career.

I never knew what he did at all, which caused a problem in junior school where in one of the lessons we were required to write about what our father's did for work. I managed one sentence which was my father is a Royal Marine. It still haunts me over 50 years later, but it was a different time and the code of silence was ingrained.

 

[ozzygull]

My mum when I was about 15 said to me “Make sure you enjoy life before settling down. always be able to stand on your own two feet and be able to look after yourself, and don’t be surprised when you find out the majority of men are total w@nkers” it came out of the blue while I was eating my Frosties as I had never heard her use that word before or use swear words at all. Best bit of advise I was ever given though.

 

[DavidinSouthampton]

Before I went to University, an uncle said to me (my parents both died when I was 16/17) “always use a sheath”.
I genuinely didn’t know what he was talking about and wondered why he assumed I would be interested in fencing.
If he had used a different word - Johnny or Condom for example - I would have understood!

 

[dadams2k11]

When I was about five my Dad said he wanted me to learn an important lesson. He got me to stand a chest of drawers and told me to jump because he would catch me. So I jumped, he stood back, and I crashed to the floor.

I cried and asked him why he didn't catch me when he said he would.

'That's your lesson,' he said. 'Trust no-one'.

 

[Yes Chef]

My Mum, quite out of the blue, once told me about the night I was conceived

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

First family package flight to Benidorm, we were just crossing the France-Spain border. Mum caught her first glimpse of the majestic snow-capped peaks of the Pyrenees, and yelled excitedly 'Look everybody! There's the Andes!'

 

[father_and_son]

This is a problem easily solved... no ITV

Corrected for you. Something of a mantra for life that!

 

[Westdene Seagull]

Back in 1983 my brother and I were in the Scouts and one particular Saturday were booked for a Troop day out. The night before around the dinner table our Dad (RIP) said that he'd been offered some tickets to that weekends match ( he was a bank manager at the time and got offered lots of freebies from business customers ) but had turned them down. When asked why he'd turned them down he said he thought we'd rather go on the Scout trip. The match the tickets were for was our FA Cup Semi-Final !

 

[Green Cross Code Man]

We were sitting at the dinner table, guests included, for Sunday roast. My Father, a church Pastor, in a lull in the conversation, asked loudly 'What is buggery?' The words hung in the air, resonating uncomfortably.

 

[acrossthepond]

"Who the **** are you?"
Thanks Dad....