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[Misc] Things that you've done that could have killed you, making you die to death



Cheshire Cat

The most curious thing..
I ate a meat pie, away at Oldham, right back in the day.

The pies they sold in Halifax at the Shay were even worse. No wonder there was hardly anyone there.
 




jakarta

Well-known member
May 25, 2007
15,738
Sullington
Oooh, that was my racing era - but never did the TT or Manx GP
A 3-speedings totting up 3 month ban in 1979 got me on the track at Lydden with my RD400
This was followed by TZ250 - TZ350 [x2] - RG500 [not the road bike version] - GSXR750 over the next 10 years - I "retired" in 1989 - got to home-international licence level.

I have photos of my big crash at Clearways [Brands Hatch] in 1983 + other spills at Snetterton & Brands

Lost a few good mates during that time and had many a close shave on road bikes myself - count myself fortunate to still be here ....

Bet you wish you'd kept at least one of your TZ's - now going for stupid money IF you can find one. Myself I should have kept at least one of my Yamahas, had a lovely RD400F and bought a 350LC YPVS new in 1987, best part of £20K worth now! Majority of them stacked into walls and telephone poles back in the day means there is a bit of a shortage... :annoyed:
 


Stat Brother

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 11, 2003
73,888
West west west Sussex
The pies they sold in Halifax at the Shay were even worse. No wonder there was hardly anyone there.

The evidence on this thread would suggest eating a meat pie is the most dangerous life threatening thing any Northstandchater has ever done, and is held in the highest esteem among the peer group..


I'd imagine the OP is a tad confused. :lol:
 


Biffer

Active member
Jul 13, 2003
670
It was indeed her pussy. I was required to pull various items out of her lady area with my teeth. Whilst nursing my bloody and broken nose.
She told me that if we don't complete the show she wouldn't get paid so I laid down and did what was required.

Anything for Bozza on his stag do

Sent from my SM-G975F using Tapatalk
 


Birdie Boy

Well-known member
Jun 17, 2011
4,387
It was indeed her pussy. I was required to pull various items out of her lady area with my teeth. Whilst nursing my bloody and broken nose.
She told me that if we don't complete the show she wouldn't get paid so I laid down and did what was required.

Anything for Bozza on his stag do

Sent from my SM-G975F using Tapatalk
Was she a big black lady with a banana, as this is pretty much what happen to me as well? [emoji4]
 




Questions

Habitual User
Oct 18, 2006
25,504
Worthing
I dived into a sandbank head first in Cyprus, broke 3 bones in my neck, I fought back against a barman who had a shotgun in Marseille , I took it off him. 9 people were machine gunned in the same bar, about a month later, part of a drug war.
Over 60 cardiac arrests, pneumothorax, pulmonary embolism.

Some night that was then....
 


Bozza

You can change this
Helpful Moderator
Jul 4, 2003
57,286
Back in Sussex
Was she a big black lady with a banana, as this is pretty much what happen to me as well? [emoji4]

It was a chain of handkerchiefs - the kind you'd expect a magician to pull from a hat. They just kept coming and coming.

It was one helluva show.
 








m20gull

Well-known member
Jun 10, 2004
3,478
Land of the Chavs
O tone night in Estonia I fell in the Baltic sea one October back in the early 1990s, when I was a student and had been drinking. I had been with a group of other people walking around the coast a few miles outside Tallinn, coming back from a bar.

It was very cold and the rocks were very slippery - I went right under and bashed my head on them - but I managed to climb out and eventually found the other people again, none of whom had any idea I'd fallen in.

With age and wisdom I now realise that it's exactly the sort of thing that happens to students every year and a few tend to die: drunk young men and water is not a good combination.
As students 8 of us went boating on the Broads for what was essentially a 14 day slow pub crawl. One night we were back on the boat and nobody noticed there were only 7 of us until the last man turned up soaking wet.
 


Frankie

Put him in the curry
May 23, 2016
4,383
Mid west Wales
-The time I jumped off a 12m bridge and nearly landed on a large boat that was passing underneath.
- Numerous motorbike near misses in Vietnam. In one notable incident, I found myself wrapped in electricity cables while my bike flew off down the road. The two bags of beers I was transporting did not survive.
-The running street battle with the Hanoi mafia which escalated rather quickly from a few choice words to sticks, bricks and knives.

They usually bite hard , hence the nickname , very lucky to avoid anything but death there .
 




Poojah

Well-known member
Nov 19, 2010
1,881
Leeds
I've had a few close calls over the years. The first one was when I was about twelve years old and at school. Me and a couple of mates would club together some of our school dinner money to buy a couple of packs of fags for the week. There was a shop just round the corner from the school that would happily sell them to you, school uniform or not.

On this particular day it was my turn to sneak out at breaktime to go and source 40 Lambert & Butler. The tricky thing was getting out of the school grounds without getting caught, which carried reasonably serious punishment in the context of a 12 year old schoolkid. I was just about out of the school's back gates when I noticed the headmaster, who could be a real nasty piece of work if you got on the wrong side of him, emerge from the main building. I shat my pants (figuratively), and opted to leg it across the 40mph main road which flanked the school.

Without looking. I ran into the road and felt an immediate whoosh as a Ford Mondeo sped by me, missing me by what must have been millimetres. The woman driving wrote a letter to the school that was read out at assembly a few days later, saying that she was certain she was going to kill me and that she'd had to pull over to compose herself and had nightmares in the days following. I never mentioned it to a soul until now, and casually returned with the ciggies. Haven't smoked in nearly 10 years mind, and I don't miss it.

That period was a tough time for me as it happens. I had made the mistake of attempting to buy some weed off a new kid at school. I hadn't really been looking for it, but we got chatting, he said he had some and I thought it would look cool in front of my mates to agree to buy some. Anyway, I was by no means a connoisseur of the stuff and it transpired that what I had actually purchased for my ten English pounds was a small ziplock bag of parsley.

I made the mistake of slagging this kid off to a few people, only to quickly learn he wasn't someone I should be slagging off. Shit escalated, and I spent literally weeks trying to avoid the lad and his mates who had form for dishing out some pretty nasty beatings - one kid had already ended up in hospital with little more than a **** given by the school. I worked out a little route that would lead me the bus stop I needed whilst encountering as few people as possible, and this worked for some time.

One day however I realised that I'd been rumbled and I was being followed. This lad and at least five of his mates were behind me, heckling me, letting me know I was about to get it. I was about to get the beating of a lifetime. And then, lo and behold, there's my dad in his car, waiting for me. This NEVER happened, either before or after. It turned out he'd secretly taken the day off work to get tickets to Grimsby's game against Bournemouth in the 1998 Auto Windscreens Shield final - our first ever Wembley appearance, and had rocked up to bring me the exciting news. I might not have died if he hadn't done that, but I'd have had my ****ing head kicked in, absolutely no doubt about that.

Anyway, that wasn't the end of it. My miraculous reprieve from said head-kicking had not got down well. I heard through a friend of a friend one day that the kid had got hold of a gun and was coming for me. I was nervous, but brushed it off as bullshit. This was 1998, Cleethorpes. There weren't any guns. But no, that wasn't the case, he'd manage to steal his mate's dad licensed hunting rifle and was on the lookout for me. Fortunately, word spread quickly, police were called and the gun was dumped and later retrieved from a lake in a local park.

Whether he'd actually have shot me had he found me in time, I'll never know. I don't like to think about it in truth. The lad in question died from a combination of dodgy Heroin and asthma aged 21, the same day I picked up the keys to my first house. I feel no animosity. I later learned that he had witnessed his own dad's murder by his uncle as a small child, and so without excusing his actions its understandable that he bared his anger.

The other time was much later, I was in my early twenties I think. I was playing a football tournament in Leeds. It's a tournament I played in every year from 2002 until 2013, and the acommodation was some horrendous student digs which have since been demolished. The tournament was always in July, so it was usually hot.

I was pretty tanked up one night when I returned with a kebab and a few tinnies. My bedroom was roasting, so I went to open the window, which was a funny, large single glazed affair which opened vertically outwards on some kind of tilt mechanism. It would only open about an inch, and it was sweltering, and so in my anger I used brute force to try and open it further, not noticing there was a catch preventining it from opening any wider.

The entire pane of glass dropped out on me. It left me with hundreds of tiny cuts, except for a large piece of glass in the pit of my forearm. I removed the glass, and boy did I start pissing blood. At this point, my mates who had heard the smash had arrived and managed to tournaquet the arm. Not wanting to make a big deal of things, got myself a taxi and went off to Leeds General Infirmary. The bleeding had more or less stopped by this point, however after a thorough investigation I was told pieces of glass has travelled millimetres from my brachial artery at which point the bleeding would have been unstemmable.

Here but by the grace of God.
 


Questions

Habitual User
Oct 18, 2006
25,504
Worthing
....
 
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rogersix

Well-known member
Jan 18, 2014
8,202
This is the first time I’ve seen this 70s footage.

What in the name of bloody hell were they thinking?

Ok it was the 70s and all that. But the lack of common sense and concern for wellbeing is unreal.

the sound engineer with him fugged up and made him do the plinth again!
 




ForestRowSeagull

Well-known member
Jan 6, 2011
976
Now Brixton
Most recently Canyoning in Bovec, Slovenia with 9 of my mates in September 2019. Basically climbing to the top of a gorge and then jumping into rock pools, turning rocks into water slides, and abseiling to get down. My mates had been before in Switzerland, I never had, so they had picked an "intermediate" course that also involved being lowered down a 50 metre high waterfall. I nearly shit myself.



That afternoon we took giant scooters down another mountain after two pints of craft beer.

One of the most annoying things about 2020 was our planned trip for this year getting binned off, though there was a day when i thought the virus was going to finish me off less glamorously.


Canyoning is great fun. Done it a few times in France in the summer - what a buzz
 


The Clamp

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jan 11, 2016
26,182
West is BEST
Fighting a guy who pulled a gun on me at work.
Fighting a pikey who was trying to stab my neck with a screwdriver. He took a few good goes at my knee cap too before I got him restrained. At work.
Countless knives and needles pulled on me. At work.

I no longer do that job and I spend my free time hiking, watching SCCC, drinking ale in country pubs and generally avoiding fuss.:drink:
 


Shropshire Seagull

Well-known member
Nov 5, 2004
8,787
Telford
Bet you wish you'd kept at least one of your TZ's - now going for stupid money IF you can find one. Myself I should have kept at least one of my Yamahas, had a lovely RD400F and bought a 350LC YPVS new in 1987, best part of £20K worth now! Majority of them stacked into walls and telephone poles back in the day means there is a bit of a shortage... :annoyed:

Yeah, I had 3 x 350LCs over the years - the black one with the bikini fairing was the best. I kept a scrapbook of all the bikes I have owned [worked in the bike trade for 10 years] - over 50 at last count ...

TZ's were great race bikes but my ex John Newbold RG500 was a delight to race - got expensive throwing that up the road with two magnesium carbs hanging off each side ....
And crank rebuilds [4 individuals] at £200 each every 1000 race miles made me very appreciative of the sponsorship I had at the time.

Happy days ....
 


sydney

tinky ****in winky
Jul 11, 2003
17,965
town full of eejits
all sorts of silliness in the African bush / jungle , vehicle roll overs , brushes with local wildlife both 2 and 4 legged.

breaking both legs in a rock climbing incident and getting airlifted out 3 months hospital .

systemic speptaceamea (sic)........5 months in hospital , lost 28 kg's body still ****ed.

run in with bikie gand in Auckland , 5 weeks hospital.
 




B-right-on

Living the dream
Apr 23, 2015
6,722
Shoreham Beaaaach
Bet you wish you'd kept at least one of your TZ's - now going for stupid money IF you can find one. Myself I should have kept at least one of my Yamahas, had a lovely RD400F and bought a 350LC YPVS new in 1987, best part of £20K worth now! Majority of them stacked into walls and telephone poles back in the day means there is a bit of a shortage... :annoyed:

'Back in the day', Yam RD250, air-cooled version, 17 years old on L plates, copious amounts of alcohol (long before ID was required) on a night out, decided to ride my bike home because I was too pissed to walk the 10 miles.

One stone wall later, I got home though other methods.

Managed to get the bike back on the road again, new forks, front wheel, headlight. Only for it to get nicked about 6 months later.
 




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