- Jul 7, 2003
- 47,546
1) Waving imaginary cards at the referee
2) Casually running across the ball just as your opponents place it for a free kick. Pretending you're just walking back, but making damn sure they can't take it
3) Doing any of the following goal celebrations (a) kissing the badge (b) that rocking the baby thing (c) anything that's really obviously contrived and pre-rehearsed, like certain dance routines
4) Having your kids names sewn into your football boots
5) Blowing snot out of your nose by closing one nostril
6) sweating as much as Zidane does
7) Smugly applauding the ref when he sends an opponent off (see Batistuta, Gabriel)
8) Jumping up and down celebrating, in a team hug, when you're awarded a penalty. Celebrate when you score it, you overpaid idiots, not before.
2) Casually running across the ball just as your opponents place it for a free kick. Pretending you're just walking back, but making damn sure they can't take it
3) Doing any of the following goal celebrations (a) kissing the badge (b) that rocking the baby thing (c) anything that's really obviously contrived and pre-rehearsed, like certain dance routines
4) Having your kids names sewn into your football boots
5) Blowing snot out of your nose by closing one nostril
6) sweating as much as Zidane does
7) Smugly applauding the ref when he sends an opponent off (see Batistuta, Gabriel)
8) Jumping up and down celebrating, in a team hug, when you're awarded a penalty. Celebrate when you score it, you overpaid idiots, not before.