[Technology] Things designed specifically to annoy and frustrate people.

[Baldseagull]

QWERTY keyboards. Designed to slow you down (so the keys on a typewriter don't jam), according to myth anyway.

No going back now.

It was to stop typewriters jamming, but not by slowing you down, by avoiding having keys that would frequently be used one after the other, next to each other, so there was more clearance between the arm that was dropping back and the one that was flying up.

 

[Baldseagull]

Blow up dolls

Exhausting, blistering, completely one way, absolutely nothing in return, plus every single one I purchased didn't even last a week.

If you take one back to the shop and tell them it went down on you, they charge you another fiver.

 

[Baldseagull]

Chastity Belts.

 

[Megazone]

If you take one back to the shop and tell them it went down on you, they charge you another fiver.

Does the same apply if you say it the other way round?

 

[Westdene Seagull]

On new toilet cisterns and basins.

Yep!

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I know it won't match your tough macho plumber images but nail varnish remover is your friend here. And as a bonus it will help you remove your nail varnish when you get home

 

[Bevendean Hillbilly]

Golf clubs that don't hit the ball where it should go.

The two minute recap on a weekly TV thriller from last week.

There’s an unexpected bonus here. When using Sky+ To see which one of the 400 episodes of Eastenders that my other half clogs up the Sky planner memory with. There’s a handy recap, usually a one line description, reading something like “Phil Mitchell falls off the wagon again. Kat Slater regrets sleeping with Ian Bleale.” Which saves one the trouble of actually watching that shit.

 

[Greg Bobkin]

Twitter.

 

[Brovion]

Stuff that comes in sealed plastic packaging like this. Requiring a moderately dangerous hack round with a bread knife or a pair of scissors.

Especially when the package contains scissors. Is someone having a laugh ?

Ha! Yes! We went camping once and we'd bought a new knife which cam in a sealed pack just like that. It was SO sealed that we had to ask the people in the next tent if they had a knife so we could open our knife!

 

[el punal]

Oh, just the world in general and everyone that lives in it . . . .

 

[Super Steve Earle]

Rubber Johnies!
They should provide a natty applicator.
Unless you are expert at snapping one on, you get to that moment, trying to get it out with your teeth and then fumbling around trying to roll it down, even worse if you have a todger like a grand national winner.
By the time you are sure it's not going to ping off you are flaccid.

My uncle had a todger like a cat - he called his cat Todger!

 

[Super Steve Earle]

BG fits the thread title perfectly.

 

[Lower West Stander]

Those plastic seal things that are supposed to clip together on top of cheese packets to make it stay fresh.

They never work. I’m sticking with cling film.

Oh and my new Callaway driver.


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[Garry Nelson's teacher]

most things that need keys to make them open or work.

 

[happypig]

If it's got tits or an engine it will give you trouble.

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

I remember seeing an advert on US TV about 15 years ago advertising a little gadget to cleanly open these packages. I thought it was a great idea but never found them for sale in this country and eventually forgot all about it. I wonder if I can get ownership of the patent?

The problem was the gadget came in heavy plastic packaging that was extremely difficult to remove.

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

Washing machines. Fine for washing clothes.It's moving them I can't stand. Why do they not put grips or a handle cavities on them? Why?

Same reason that paving stones don't have handles. They aren't designed to be portable.

Of course, you have my sympathy if your job involves installing washing machines. Or laying paving stones.

 

[rippleman]

Self-service checkouts

 

[Tokyohands]

On new toilet cisterns and basins.

I shit you not, there was a sticker on my brand new toilet that only said 'do not remove this label'. Of course I tried to remove it as it was the most pointless sticker ever, now left with a feckin yellow square on my toilet.

 

[sussex_guy2k2]

Other people.

 

[The Clamp]

Same reason that paving stones don't have handles. They aren't designed to be portable.

Of course, you have my sympathy if your job involves installing washing machines. Or laying paving stones.

I’ve paid the odd patio and moved my fair share of washing machines but don’t have to do it for a living thankfully . I get that they have to be solid and stable, concrete blocks in them etc but surely a couple of grips on them would help come moving days?

Basically if you had to design the most awkward thing to shift, you’d come up with the Washing machine ( or Theresa May). Boxy, heavy and nothing to grip onto and if you’re lucky it’ll drip a lovely dribble of grey water on you as you go up the stairs