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Guinness Boy

Tofu eating wokerati
Helpful Moderator
NSC Patron
Jul 23, 2003
37,340
Up and Coming Sunny Portslade
My league game on Saturday, featured the single most embarrassing behaviour I have witnessed, in 40+ years of competitive cricket.

Title chasing opponents (Trojans CC - one of our very big local sports clubs) won the toss and chose to bat. Their opener (the second highest run scorer in the division, after our own gun) took FOURTEEN off my first over. I was invited to take a rest after going for 34 from 5 overs, and they were rattling along well, at 60 without loss.

Then they lost a couple, and I got to feel a bit better personally, after running out the (other) opener with a quick pick up and direct hit from the covers. They built to 170 or so for 4, and looked set for a challenging total. I had a far more satisfactory second spell, and finished up 9/2/40/2, bringing out the oppo's skipper, batting at nine...

Having scored just one, he slices a ball to gully and is caught. No controversy, but for some reason he completely loses it.
He launches his bat across the square, then proceeds to remove his helmet, and launches that 30 yards. Then he picks them both up, lobs up the helmet, and twats it with the bat, another 30 yards. Then stomps off the field, kicking his helmet the rest of the way. We're confused / shocked / hysterical - and on hearing laughing, he spins around, lets off a stream of expletives and offers us (all) a fight. Then he finally leaves the field and starts arguing with the rest of his team.

They succumb meekly to 190 all out, and we go off for a tense 'tea' interval. No teas provided yet again. Lazy pricks.

Mr Angry skipper (he's their 6'4" opener) comes charging in, and having utterly lost his head, is a complete liability. He bowls (genuinely) about 15 wides, and gets us off to a bit of a flier, leading to a comfortable chase. The winning runs, fittingly involve the clown trying for a pointless shy at the stumps, that gifts us four overthrows.

Funny day. Excellent and unexpected win.

Angry chap very lucky we had no panel umpire on the day, as he'd surely be looking at a significant ban.
It’s good, but it’s no this….

 


hans kraay fan club

The voice of reason.
Helpful Moderator
Mar 16, 2005
62,759
Chandlers Ford
Away to Portsmouth & Southsea on Saturday. Langstone Harbour Sports Ground, is a recreation ground, on the shore of the harbour, next to a sailing club. The game went very well, but it was not a day to be spending 7 hours on a field with zero shade - rather than at an actual club, with a pavilion, etc. I swear I still feel dehydrated now.

Opposition won the toss and put us in. Gun went early (had a few failures now, and he's on 873 for the league season with 3 games left - touch and go for the 1,000), and then the other opener, but a 100 stand at a good rate sorted us, and their set of young bowlers wilted badly. We closed on 255/9 (I added the 5 before being outwitted by a 15 year old, who properly did me, with a slower ball that I looked to launch into the Solent).

Enjoyed myself with ball - 9/0/26/4, and strangely - for the second week in a row (having not done similar in years) - added a direct hit run out, which is always a real buzz. I'm claiming a SORT OF fivefer!

Didn't manage to get the last couple of wickets for the final bowling point, but won by 47 runs, for a good (23 point) win.
 




hans kraay fan club

The voice of reason.
Helpful Moderator
Mar 16, 2005
62,759
Chandlers Ford
Saturday's game was an absolute farce. Home to Ryde CC 2's - over from the IOW in their team minibus. Now Ryde are a couple of places behind us in the league, and we go in as favourites but expecting a game. Turns out to be an utterly pointless farce of an afternoon.

Apparently holidays have hit them hard, and they have a number of players who can't be bothered with the long days travelling, so only play home matches. Their side that turned up Saturday, comprised of ten players - and was really very weak.

We win the toss, and bat. Their teenage girl opening bowler, castles one of our openers in the first over - after which it gets very messy for them. We finish up (45 overs) on a ridiculous 412/3. Our star bat, gorges himself, to plunder 233 not out. He went into the match needing 127 to pass 1,000 league runs for the season, and ends up passing 1,100...

I was doing the scoring for most of the innings, and just sat and felt horrible for their young side. We've all been there, but this was bad. Felt like bullying tbh, and I'm not sure what was gained from it, other than a load of club records getting broken.

I then opened the bowling and removed all three of their grown-up batters in the first four overs, before being removed to try to give others a bit of a game. Even though we kept replacing bowler after bowler with more part-time options, they succumbed to 38 all out, to lose the 'match' by a ridiculous 374 runs. :down:

the only positives I can offer for the opposition, is that the weather was lovely, and we gave them a fabulous TEA:

Tea.jpg
 




Ali_rrr

Well-known member
Feb 4, 2011
2,848
Utrecht, NL
First season in the second division of Dutch cricket and we've survived comfortably. Kampong our city rivals have basically all but won the league, only losing once to us meaning we took the Utrechtse Ashes. A couple of our overseas boys have now left for the season but our leading run scorer has stayed. He's behind Dutch captain Scott Edwards and Dutch opener Max O'Dowd in runs scored.

Some very decent overseas players in our league and the local boys here have also done a great job.
 




Ali_rrr

Well-known member
Feb 4, 2011
2,848
Utrecht, NL
Is that like French Cricket...? :shrug:





:lol:
In all seriousness, Dutch cricket is improving rapidly and the standard is higher every year. More and more overseas players are coming either to here or Ireland instead of England due to tightening of Visa restrictions. People who have played high level in NZ/Aus/SA often have restrictions on getting working holiday visas in the UK.
 






Ali_rrr

Well-known member
Feb 4, 2011
2,848
Utrecht, NL
Good traditional Dutch names there
Yeah unfortunately, the take up of the sport by 'native' has had a huge decrease where it now is slowly increasing again. It used to be a sport where people would play football in the winter and cricket in the summer, but most choose to just take a few months off sport.

The KNCB (Dutch ECB) decided the only way things were going to get better is if they started recruiting players with Dutch heritage, to properly compete in ICC events and thus increasing revenue. So far it's worked well where we're seeing better facilities across the board and more players becoming professional.
 


Mackenzie

Old Brightonian
Nov 7, 2003
34,009
East Wales
The girls beat Monmouth by 102 runs on Sunday, my eldest 4/0/9/1 and youngest 2/0/7/2 had a good day with the ball and our young opener made her maiden club 100. They’re now second in the league and play the top team next. They’re a really young team, the average age is probably 16, and the improvement this season has been amazing to watch. I hope they all maintain their enthusiasm for the game and keep going next season, it could be special.

No game again for my son, still injured. Really frustrating times for him.
 




Audax

Boing boing boing...
Aug 3, 2015
3,263
Uckfield
Hopefully making my return for Uckfield 1sts this weekend. Missed the last 3 due to holiday, but was timed well as my back is feeling much better. Not to mention my bout of covid the week before the holiday...

Anyway, could be a fun one. We play Laughton at theirs, a ground I know rather well. And apparently both my brother-in-laws are playing so it'll be a real family-vs-family affair.

Edit: in my absence the team managed a second win of the season. A 1 run win, after they needed 4 in the final over.
 


Eeyore

Colonel Hee-Haw of Queen's Park
NSC Patron
Apr 5, 2014
25,909
1724455137691.jpeg


Goodrington, Paignton. 1973. My first innings. Intensely focused. Standing slightly outside the crease, aiming to play my Dad's underarm on the full.
 


hans kraay fan club

The voice of reason.
Helpful Moderator
Mar 16, 2005
62,759
Chandlers Ford
I made myself unavailable for tomorrow - my responsibility to get my Mum to the Amex, won out. Not popular with the very intense skipper, as winning the last two probably sees us promoted.

But - after a fair bit of agonising over the decision, looks like the cricket might well be washed out anyway…
 




Eeyore

Colonel Hee-Haw of Queen's Park
NSC Patron
Apr 5, 2014
25,909
1724629196526.jpeg

What an odd badge. Not sure I would fancy that on my shirt.
 




Eeyore

Colonel Hee-Haw of Queen's Park
NSC Patron
Apr 5, 2014
25,909










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