Statement from the Arsenal and Torquay manager, BAG

[ben andrews' girlfriend]

Good day people.

I would just like to announce that I am on holiday as of about 11 o clock tomorrow, so i will be unable to look after my team for the next 2 weeks, up until the 9/8/04.

Artois has agreed to look after my team as caretaker manager - who will look after everything while I am away.

I would like to say to my fans that I remain totally dedicated to these teams, and am confident that Artois will keep the team in a positive focus.

Thankyou,

BAG

 

[Artois]

So I have two weeks to:

a) Sell off all the good players
b) Sell the ground to a property developer
c) Pocket all the cash and sell my shares in the club.

 

[Gazwag]

Thought you were caretaker manager not the chairman

 

[Artois]

That's what she thinks.

 

[CHAPPERS]

It doesn't matter, the title is MINE anyway.

 

[The Great Cornholio]

So I have two weeks to:

a) Sell off all the good players
b) Sell the ground to a property developer
c) Pocket all the cash and sell my shares in the club.

That's a lot to expect from my dice! I should be able to pick up again tonight when I finish my tour of the West Country.