Small things that irritate you.....

[Albumen]

My penis.

No wait.

 

[aftershavedave]

Declan Donnelly

 

[looney]

Isn't that one self explanatory? It may well have existed before but I remember it being said by Lisa in the episode of The Simpsons many years ago.



So when Izquierdo bangs in a winner on Saturday should people refer to it as Brighton's only PL goal or 1st PL goal?

Only is correct, first is inaccurate and presumptive.

 

[whitelion]

Your joking !

Do you mean you're joking?

 

[Raleigh Chopper]

The general public going about anything in their day.
I think that has just about thrown a net over most things that annoy me.
The people of this country have changed beyond recognition over the past 30 years or so.
A day hardly goes by when I don't encounter people doing the most selfish, stupid or ignorant thing.
Except me, I'm alright.

 

[Weststander]

Declan Donnelly

Tim Lovejoy. Why?

 

[portlock seagull]

Totally agree. Once had a situation like that around the corner from my house in Liverpool. The cones etc guarding people from falling into it and cars from driving into it kept falling over. I phoned the bloke on Liverpool council so much he threatened to leave the country and live a better life in Spain. After weeks of complaints I threatened to fill the hole in myself. It was only then they took any notice and the next day, sure enough, the council were there sorting the problem out.

Power to the people! Well done Sir, you can be my Minister for Transport!

 

[hitony]

Anyone who moans about small things that irritate them.........

 

[AmexRuislip]

library books that are constantly out on loan

Sounds like Chelsea library books then?

 

[Withdeano]

People who press the button on a pelican crossing when there's only one car approaching and plenty of opportunity to cross once it's passed

 

[AmexRuislip]

Philip 'me me' Schofield, hanging onto his ever receding blue rinse and trying to look cool with the youngsters.
Cannot stand the man!

 

[Whitechapel]

People who use the self-service check-out at a supermarket when they don't have a f*cking clue how to use it.

It is ALWAYS some stupid fat bint who clearly uses words like "holibobs" and thinks dealyboppers are the height of hilarity. She'll trundle her full f*cking trolley up to the self service checkout. The first item out is without fail a copy of Heat or Okay magazine. She won't know how to scan it so she'll just flair her arm around in front of the scanner like an octopus in a washing machine until finally it scans.

She'll struggle through the next 2815 items in her basket as I slowly realise that it would have been much quicker for me to join the 10 person long queue at the normal checkout then wait behind this monstrous c*nt.

Then at the bottom of her trolley will be one loose piece of fruit, that doesn't have a barcode. She'll spend the rest of the week trying to find the barcode before staring blankly in the direction of somebody who works there, waiting for them to notice her and come to help instead of pressing the assistance button. Finally she'll be shown how to input the item and you can start seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.

Nope. Her Fat, Ugly, Stupid kid will now have to scan an item themselves and despite there now being a queue slightly longer than the Great Wall of China she'll stand there beaming at her moronic offspring trying and failing to scan a Kinder Surprise.

Once this is done all you have left to worry about is how long will it take for her to read "how many bags would you like?" before imputing her answer. It should be simple but I've genuinely been stuck behind people who can't figure it out. They type in "2" then stare blankly at the screen, press cancel and then type in "2" again. PRESS OKAY YOU F*CKING RETARD.

And after all of that, and after she's read her recipt at the checkout, and after she's counted her change and double checked it's enough she finally moves on and I can buy my bottle of water and pack of chewing gum.

 

[LowKarate]

Paramecium!

Cunning little #%<$>!

 

[portlock seagull]

People who use the self-service check-out at a supermarket when they don't have a f*cking clue how to use it.

It is ALWAYS some stupid fat bint who clearly uses words like "holibobs" and thinks dealyboppers are the height of hilarity. She'll trundle her full f*cking trolley up to the self service checkout. The first item out is without fail a copy of Heat or Okay magazine. She won't know how to scan it so she'll just flair her arm around in front of the scanner like an octopus in a washing machine until finally it scans.

She'll struggle through the next 2815 items in her basket as I slowly realise that it would have been much quicker for me to join the 10 person long queue at the normal checkout then wait behind this monstrous c*nt.

Then at the bottom of her trolley will be one loose piece of fruit, that doesn't have a barcode. She'll spend the rest of the week trying to find the barcode before staring blankly in the direction of somebody who works there, waiting for them to notice her and come to help instead of pressing the assistance button. Finally she'll be shown how to input the item and you can start seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.

Nope. Her Fat, Ugly, Stupid kid will now have to scan an item themselves and despite there now being a queue slightly longer than the Great Wall of China she'll stand there beaming at her moronic offspring trying and failing to scan a Kinder Surprise.

Once this is done all you have left to worry about is how long will it take for her to read "how many bags would you like?" before imputing her answer. It should be simple but I've genuinely been stuck behind people who can't figure it out. They type in "2" then stare blankly at the screen, press cancel and then type in "2" again. PRESS OKAY YOU F*CKING RETARD.

And after all of that, and after she's read her recipt at the checkout, and after she's counted her change and double checked it's enough she finally moves on and I can buy my bottle of water and pack of chewing gum.

Quality rant! Splendid in fact and oh so true!!

 

[ArfurW8]

Trendy celebrities on television who don't pronounce the letter T in the word artist.

Overweight blokes over the age of 25 wearing skinny jeans. Just get a better/bigger fit fatty.

 

[biddles911]

Totally agree. Once had a situation like that around the corner from my house in Liverpool. The cones etc guarding people from falling into it and cars from driving into it kept falling over. I phoned the bloke on Liverpool council so much he threatened to leave the country and live a better life in Spain. After weeks of complaints I threatened to fill the hole in myself. It was only then they took any notice and the next day, sure enough, the council were there sorting the problem out.

Knowing Liverpool, it was probably a job creation scheme and it worked....!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[Diablo]

Do you mean you're joking?

You`re correct,Your decision..whether I`m joking or not.

 

[Driver8]

People who use the self-service check-out at a supermarket when they don't have a f*cking clue how to use it.

It is ALWAYS some stupid fat bint who clearly uses words like "holibobs" and thinks dealyboppers are the height of hilarity. She'll trundle her full f*cking trolley up to the self service checkout. The first item out is without fail a copy of Heat or Okay magazine. She won't know how to scan it so she'll just flair her arm around in front of the scanner like an octopus in a washing machine until finally it scans.

She'll struggle through the next 2815 items in her basket as I slowly realise that it would have been much quicker for me to join the 10 person long queue at the normal checkout then wait behind this monstrous c*nt.

Then at the bottom of her trolley will be one loose piece of fruit, that doesn't have a barcode. She'll spend the rest of the week trying to find the barcode before staring blankly in the direction of somebody who works there, waiting for them to notice her and come to help instead of pressing the assistance button. Finally she'll be shown how to input the item and you can start seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.

Nope. Her Fat, Ugly, Stupid kid will now have to scan an item themselves and despite there now being a queue slightly longer than the Great Wall of China she'll stand there beaming at her moronic offspring trying and failing to scan a Kinder Surprise.

Once this is done all you have left to worry about is how long will it take for her to read "how many bags would you like?" before imputing her answer. It should be simple but I've genuinely been stuck behind people who can't figure it out. They type in "2" then stare blankly at the screen, press cancel and then type in "2" again. PRESS OKAY YOU F*CKING RETARD.

And after all of that, and after she's read her recipt at the checkout, and after she's counted her change and double checked it's enough she finally moves on and I can buy my bottle of water and pack of chewing gum.

Serves you right for buying chewing gum. Revolting stuff.

 

[atfc village]

Nicholas Andrew Argyll Campbell

 

[Green Cross Code Man]

Knowing Liverpool, it was probably a job creation scheme and it worked....!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

You are most probably correct! [emoji1]