Seriously, how THICK are West Ham and Millwall fans?

[coventrygull]

I went to school with a bloke who's apparently now got a crap tattoo on his hand that he did in Prison.

I win.

Even toffs end up in prison

 

[coventrygull]

I was born in the Elephant and Castle, proper GEEZER country, so I win

Don't think so Coventry is proper hardcore

 

[Buzzer]

Fair point.

Okay then, i used to go out with a girl who shopped at Argos.

What do I win?

 

[Dick Knights Mumm]

What do I win?

A loaded nappy thrown at the back of your head I believe.

 

[El Presidente]

I can trump you now too Cov as I currently reside in...........

Stockport

Amenities: The actor who plays Frasier Crane’s dad in the American sit-com Frasier once owned a house here.

Stockport is a small town in South Manchester. Much of Engels’ research for Marx’s Communist Manifesto was based on the apalling working conditions in the town’s hat mills. And to be honest it’s gone down hill ever since.

The overiding ‘look’ for Stockport’s locals is a shaven head with optional Fila cap / visor perched on top, a Reebok shell suit the legs of which are tucked into a pair of overpowering patterned socks and a pair of Rockport, Timberland or Kicker boots. Gold jewellry is popular, usually incorporating sovereigns and / or Marijuana leaf motifs. The male uniform is fairly similar.

Anyone deviating from this universally accepted look faces daily verbal and physical abuse.

Entertainment includes avoiding being glassed in one of the town’s many pubs, avoiding being stabbed on the infamous “192″ bus and avoiding leaving your house as much
as possible.

Merseyway precinct is the town’s heart. If you do wish to buy anything from Woolworths, Argos or “Everything
For £1″, avoid walking within stone’s throw of the 2nd floor balcony edge or you face a shower of gob, McDonald’s fries and of course stones from the gangs of youths above.

Recent attempts to open an Amsterdam-style cannbis cafe were thwarted by local police.

For more information for tourists wishing to visit Stockport please log onto http://www.stockport.gov.uk.

Charlie Hungerford

A KIND LETTER

I was only made aware of your magazine, by reading an article in the local Stockport paper, which expresses it’s outrage at your comments on the town, and decided to look you up on the net. I, myself, am Stockport born and bred, and can assure you that your comments were absoloutely spot on. It’s shite. Well Done.

Our local MP, Ann Coffey, alleges that she doesn’t know the town from your description, and thinks you must mean Southport ! She has obviously never glanced at someone, accidentally, in Luckies on a Friday night and then got filled in, in the car park afterwards.
I’ll be writing to the “Letters To The Editor” part of the paper, this week, (anonnymously) commending your article. I’ll let you know how I go on.
Regards.
Anon

 

[Simster]

Fair point.

Okay then, i used to go out with a girl who shopped at Argos.

What do I win?

I have three pound shops within 1.5 miles of my house, so I'm afraid you win nothing.

 

[coventrygull]

Coventry Crime Statistics Stats | UpMyStreet

Beat that El Pres.

 

[Jahooli]

I heard a brown skinned, skinny chap tell his white skinned, fat girlfriend that she was "vexing 'im 'ard". His trousers didn't fit properly and her make up was badly applied, I duly reported them to the police.

 

[El Presidente]

Coventry Crime Statistics Stats | UpMyStreet

Beat that El Pres.

Those stats were only AFTER you moved there though mate!

 

[The Spanish]

I can trump you now too Cov as I currently reside in...........

he has fallen on hard times since Bergerac.

 

[Pretty pink fairy]

No he doesn't, he comes accross as a daft racist.

blinkered or what

 

[The Spanish]

I have three pound shops within 1.5 miles of my house, so I'm afraid you win nothing.

at the end of your drive then?

 

[Pretty pink fairy]

I have three pound shops within 1.5 miles of my house, so I'm afraid you win nothing.

how would you know

 

[coventrygull]

Those stats were only AFTER you moved there though mate!

 

[southwickseagull]

Forgive me if i'm wrong, but i thought this was a thread about the violence at West Ham the other night. What the f*** has all this racist shit got to do with that?

 

[El Presidente]

I have a funny feeling this thread is descending into the Python four Yorkshiremen sketch.

 

[Pretty pink fairy]

Forgive me if i'm wrong, but i thought this was a thread about the violence at West Ham the other night. What the f*** has all this racist shit got to do with that?

oh dear.........

 

[Simster]

how would you know

How do you think I know, you dossing simpleton?

:dasreich:


(Spelling it out for the board moron: There are three pound shops in Redhill, and I live a mile and a half away)

 

[Buzzer]

how would you know

I think he was being ironic, Das. Either that or the au pair told him.

I've actually been in one of those pound shops before. What is it with those places and wholesale packs of Bombay Mix? Do the working classes eat a lot of that stuff then?

 

[Dick Knights Mumm]

at the end of your drive then?

blimey - that was funny. Good man.