[Misc] Sayings your old mum or dad said.

[NooBHA]

If you asked my mother to do something for you and she thought I was being too lazy to do it myself, she would say. " Away and pee up ma kilt "

 

[NooBHA]

When we drove past a tramp, dad would say 'I wonder how Ken is?' (his brother)

Talking about walking past tramps in the street. My mate and I were walking past a bloke in his sleeping bag sleeping in a doorway and he asked my mate if he had a spare cigarette. To which my mate responds. " No, and you shouldn't be smoking in bed anyhow "

A bit dated but it was funny at the time it happened

 

[chickens]

One my gran used to say (if something broke) “Well, that’s gone for a burton.”

 

[DavidinSouthampton]

If you asked my mother to do something for you and she thought I was being too lazy to do it myself, she would say. " Away and pee up ma kilt "

Reminds me of “what did your last servant die of?”

 

[PILTDOWN MAN]

One my gran used to say (if something broke) “Well, that’s gone for a burton.”

Interestingly there's two very different versions of the meaning.

1. WWII training aircrew in Blackpool if they failed the exam, Morse code in particular, they would be reassigned to rear gunner (life expectancy as we know poor). The training for this was done at a billiards hall in Blackpool called Burtons.
2. Literally going down the pub to get drunk with reference to Burton being the brewery town.

I used to have a book of old phases and how they have changed, normally by people not understanding the original correctly.

Jack of all trades, meant just that, a person competent to carry out many tasks. Master of none was a later addition in the 19th century. The second part which obviously means the opposite to the original is now not said often so "Jack of all trades" alone has become a criticism of someone's ability.

 

[Wozza]

"What's for dinner then?", my dad, whilst rubbing his stomach immediately after finishing lunch.

Excruciating at home - even more so when in a restaurant, and the table is being cleared by a confused, foreign waitress.

 

[Silverhatch]

“You’ve only got your cock to keep”

My dad pointing out what the No responsibility of living at home (really) looked like

 

[Saladpack Seagull]

As black as Newgate's knocker - Mum describing dark clouds or a very overcast day.
Never go North of the Downs between October and May - Dad's rather impractical advice meaning the weather would be worse there.
Dangle me dick in a dustbin! - Dad expressing surprise, usually followed up with "and somebody slam on the lid!"
Mind your P's and Q's - Mum warning me to behave prior to us having visitors.
He's found some lead in his pencil - Mum's phrase when a couple announced a pregnancy (usually after years of trying).
Don't bring trouble home here - Mum advising me not to impregnate any new girlfriend.

 

[theboybilly]

My gran used to say to me “I know you are fibbing, I can see your eyes spinning round”
But Gran (RIP), it really wasn’t me who ate all the biscuits!

A bit like me dear Old Dad, we could all tell when he was fibbing or had been caught out because he would rub his nose between his thumb and forefinger. It was brilliant to watch him trying to convince my Mum. Such happy days xx

 

[DavidinSouthampton]

I can remember back in the late 1960s being amazed when my mother said something rude!
my parents ran a shop, and one day she was talking to one of the “ travellers” - remember them - and she said in the course of conversation “every little helps………”. They then talked about how that expression ended, and my mother said “…… said the old woman who peed in the sea”.

pretty tame by todays standards, and travellers was travelling salesmen, not people who move around the country in caravans.

 

[METALMICKY]

Reminds me of “what did your last servant die of?”

Slight variation on what I constantly find myself using with my young kids is " what did your last slave die of?" Trying to explain to an 8 year old proved to be challenging

 

[WATFORD zero]

There are loads on here I remember

Hollow Legs
Wood in the hole
All fur coat, no knickers
Born in a barn ?
Nowt as queer as folk
'Sod' being a really bad profanity
Whose she ? The Cat's mother ?

And unintentional racism/homophobia etc from elderly relatives more recently

My mum (in her 90s) about my Son's partner 'She is lovely, where's she from'
Me 'Southampton'
My mum 'Southampton ?'
Me 'Born and Bred'
My mum 'but where's she really from'
Me 'Do you mean what's her ethnicity ?'

My mum about my Son's flatmate 'He's a lovely boy, does he have a girlfriend ?'
Me 'No Mum, he's gay'
My mum 'What, he's one of them ?'
Me 'No Mum, he's one of us. My goodness, you're not one of them, are you ?'

It's their age

 

[Norman Potting]

".....What's for tea? - Catchmeddlers...." was my dad's frequent response. Kent/Sussex border expression?

 

[METALMICKY]

I'd nearly forgotten this really annoying self explanatory one from my mum's repertoire

" children and idiots shouldn't see things half done "

 

[Questions]

My old mum would always day, Gawd that’s a bit of a mooch” to any walk over 400 yards.

 

[FamilyGuy]

I can remember back in the late 1960s being amazed when my mother said something rude!
my parents ran a shop, and one day she was talking to one of the “ travellers” - remember them - and she said in the course of conversation “every little helps………”. They then talked about how that expression ended, and my mother said “…… said the old woman who peed in the sea”.

pretty tame by todays standards, and travellers was travelling salesmen, not people who move around the country in caravans.

Off topic a bit, but I can remember my shock when my granddad said something rude when he first told me "a dirty joke", he always seemed so "polite" until then.

Aformentioned joke (told to me in a Watneys pub at lunchtime):
What's the connection between Watneys Red Barrel and making love in a Punt?
They're both F***ing near water.

You can tell how long ago it was by the beer in question.

 

[cloud]

When behind a slow driver - "He's got nowhere to go and all day to get there"

 

[Scoticus]

Interestingly there's two very different versions of the meaning.

1. WWII training aircrew in Blackpool if they failed the exam, Morse code in particular, they would be reassigned to rear gunner (life expectancy as we know poor). The training for this was done at a billiards hall in Blackpool called Burtons.
2. Literally going down the pub to get drunk with reference to Burton being the brewery town.

I used to have a book of old phases and how they have changed, normally by people not understanding the original correctly.

Jack of all trades, meant just that, a person competent to carry out many tasks. Master of none was a later addition in the 19th century. The second part which obviously means the opposite to the original is now not said often so "Jack of all trades" alone has become a criticism of someone's ability.

Another possible explanation is that it stemmed from a 1930s Advertising campaign by a brewery, but no actual proof has been found

World Wide Words: Gone for a Burton

We seek, with some success, the origin of the British expression 'Gone for a Burton'.

www.worldwidewords.org

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

Interestingly there's two very different versions of the meaning.

1. WWII training aircrew in Blackpool if they failed the exam, Morse code in particular, they would be reassigned to rear gunner (life expectancy as we know poor). The training for this was done at a billiards hall in Blackpool called Burtons.
2. Literally going down the pub to get drunk with reference to Burton being the brewery town.

I used to have a book of old phases and how they have changed, normally by people not understanding the original correctly.

Jack of all trades, meant just that, a person competent to carry out many tasks. Master of none was a later addition in the 19th century. The second part which obviously means the opposite to the original is now not said often so "Jack of all trades" alone has become a criticism of someone's ability.

People just don't know how to tow the line anymore.

 

[PILTDOWN MAN]

People just don't know how to tow the line anymore.

Agreed the bitter end is nigh